Imagine being Grunkle Stan’s oddly beautiful and young wife:
You’re married to Stan Pines and no one understands someone with such a bright future would do such a thing.
You have a likable aura around you, a calming one, while Stan is a bit prickly. (Not to mention you can make anyone blush with just a smile.)
You’re so charming that some people actually believe you’re a witch……because you are a witch.
Stan came looking for you when he was finding ways to being Ford back and some people told him about this fortune teller aka you.
He thought you were a phony because he knew a con-artist when he saw one but when you turned him into a frog and stole his money he knew you were the real deal (Also that he needed to have you as his woman.)
You declined not because he was ugly (you found him scumbag personality quite entertaining.)
You enjoyed your life scamming people but there were people in town who were religious and believed you were a demon. (They tried reporting you to the mayor yet without proof he could do nothing….until an anonymous tip sent in photos of you do real magic.)
The town chased you out and who come to be your knight in a Cadillac? Stanley Pines.
With nothing left and in need of a hiding place, you agreed to stay with Stan in helping him return his brother.
You both settled down in Gravity Falls and opened up the Mystery Shack.
You had to change your name to Katherine to which Stan loves calling you Kit-Kat (He can snap you like one, whether it’s your back or your patience.)
While he’s the main man of the shop, you have your own section of fortune telling and since Gravity Falls residents aren’t the brightest they believe everything you tell them despite it being a lie. (You once told a woman to wear red shoes everyday and she’ll find her husband which did eventually happen.)
Speaking of marriage, Stan convinced you that it was more family friendly for the shack’s image for you to fake marry.
He wore you down to where a fake marriage turned into a real marriage.
The reason you agreed to marry him was because how much effort he put into showing he loved you through actions.
You knew Stan wasn’t the type of man to talk about his feelings but you knew from the protective hand on your lower back, the flowers stolen from someones yard, saving you the last piece of pie, the temple kisses, and so much more.
He was a grump, yet you were his soft spot.
Sure you were smoking hot and that was a plus to him, but no that’s not what got him about you. (It was the way you took care of him.)
Yes, he grew up in a time when the woman’s job was to care for her husband yet you cared for him out of love. (He’s a touch-starved man for sure so your little pecks on the lips, playful cheek slaps, and the smile on your face when he hums in delight at your new recipes were just a few things.)
You guys didn’t have any kids yet, but it wasn’t impossible since you were only 32. (Stan was pushing 50 so either way he’d just be an old dad.)
You had brought up the idea of children lately and Stan always found a way to avoid it since he was a bit uncertain about the idea until Dipper and Mabel came to spend the summer with you both:
“Ah, summer break. A time for leisure, recreation, and taking 'er easy. Unless you're me.” A boy in a hat decorated with a pine tree narrates, “My name is Dipper. The girl about to puke is my sister Mabel.” Camera pans to a sick Mabel holding onto the golf cart they were speeding on. “You may be wondering what we're doing in a golf cart, fleeing from a creature of unimaginable horror. Let's rewind. It all began when our parents decided we could use some fresh air. They shipped us up north to a sleepy town called Gravity Falls, Oregon, to stay at our great-uncle's place in the woods.”
“This attic is amazing. Check out all my splinters!” Mabel shows Dipper her hand covered in tiny wooden pieces.
Dipper cringed at this along with the barn animal in their new room. “And there's a goat on my bed.”
“Hey, friend.” The happy girl coos, “Oh! Yes, you can keep chewing on my sweater.”
“My sister tended to look on the bright side of things.” Dipper continues to narrate, “But I was having a hard time getting used to our new surroundings.”
“Boo!” Stan pops out of no where, scaring the poor boy.
“And then there was our Great Uncle Stan.” Dipper pokes out as the camera films a choking Stan that was laughing too hard. “Yeah that guy.”
“Hahahaha-ow!” Stan rubs his sore shoulder, “What was that for Kat?”
“For scaring the poor thing. He’s suffering enough having to spend his whole summer with you, so don’t make it worse.” You scold your husband, “Now stop laughing before you choke.”
“That’s our Aunt Katherine, who is really cool and pretty, which is why everyone wonders why she’s with someone like our uncle.” The scene stays on you and Stan with him trying get back into your good graces with a kiss. “Our uncle had transformed his house into a tourist trap he called “The Mystery Shack.” The real mystery was why anyone came. Then again it could be because my aunt is a “witch” and tells fortunes, if you believe that.”
“Ladies and gentlemen, behold! The Sascrotch!” Stan pulls away the curtain to show a self-made, stuffed creature.
“Oh my it says here that you will meet your soulmate wearing those red shoes.” You gasp, offering a woman a pair of red shoes with a price tag on them.
“But guess who had to work here.”
“Ooh!” Mabel gets excited and starts touching everything.
“No touching the merchandise!” Stan barks, hitting Dipper who only touch one thing unlike Mabel.
“And no hitting the kids with the cane.” You scoff, giving Stan a taste of the cane by hitting him in the shin. While he hopped in pain you pulled out a plate of freshly baked cookies for the kids. “Here sweetie.”
“Cookies! Thanks Auntie Kat!”
“Of course.” You coo at Mabel’s cuteness, “Here Fun Dip, have some too.”
“You know buying their love with treats won’t work.” Stan rolls his eyes, low-key jealous that he now had to share your cookies with these kids.
“See what did I tell you, super cool with super grump.” Dipper describes to the audience, “It looked like it was gonna be the same, boring routine all summer. Until one fateful day…”
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