Description: All the medical training in the world couldn’t prepare Ethan for a terminal brain cancer diagnosis.
Preview: The confession rolled from her lips before she had a chance to think twice. “I… showed Harper your scans to get her opinion. She thinks it could be partially operable.”
Ethan’s expression faltered, his brow furrowing in anger. “You showed Harper my charts after I asked you not to?”
Warning: Terminal cancer and eventual major character death. Read with caution.
Previous Chapter
Olivia rapped her knuckles against Harper’s door. Her breathing shallowed with anxiety in the moment that passed before Harper called, “Come in!”
Taking a deep breath, Olivia gained some sense of composure and let herself into the office. “Dr. Emery… Harper, may I ask a favor?”
“Of course. What do you need?”
Olivia’s face heated with worry as she handed Harper the envelope. Even if she’d taken any trace of Ethan’s name off of them, she couldn’t suppress the guilt she felt for going behind his back. “These are some scans and test results. Glioblastoma multiforme, right frontal lobe.”
Harper’s smile faded as she took the charts and studied them. “I don’t remember a patient being admitted with this condition.”
“It’s… not one of our patients. It’s a friend of mine from school. He reached out to me but wants to keep it to himself until he knows anything. I promised I’d get him a second opinion as a John Doe,” Olivia lied, guilt gripping her heart.
Whether Harper suspected something or not, Olivia didn’t know. She watched nervously as Harper scrutinized the films.
“I’m sure you know that this is the most aggressive type of brain tumor. They grow quickly and new ones can develop in other regions of the brain.”
“I know. I just… I thought maybe you’d know more than I do. I know it’s probably inoperable, but…”
“GBMs are usually inoperable because of the way the cells develop in the brain tissue,” Harper confirmed. “Even if there’s a chance of removing a portion of it, it’s not possible to remove every trace. The tumor would inevitably return.”
“What would you do?”
“If this were my patient… I’d start with targeted radiation and chemo. If the tumor shrunk after a few weeks, I’d remove as much as possible and follow with another course of treatment.”
Olivia nodded. “And what prognosis would you normally give? I know the usual prognosis is five to seven months without treatment, twelve to eighteen with.”
“That’s right. The five-year survival rate is less than five percent. I think you were right to ask for another opinion, but… you know that with or without treatment, this cancer is brutal.”
Olivia inhaled sharply and managed another nod. “I know. I just… I guess it’s harder to think when it’s a friend. I know to watch for worsening pain, personality changes, cognitive and emotional problems…”
“Those are all to be expected. As the condition worsens, expect problems with balance and coordination, vision problems, emotional and cognitive problems… almost every function suffers.” Harper glanced at her curiously. “Whatever your friend needs… you know where to refer him.”
“Yeah.” Olivia’s heart stuttered as she hoped Harper didn’t see through her lie. She felt guilty enough for going behind Ethan’s back and lying to Harper, but she knew Ethan would be livid if anyone found out before he was ready. “I’ll let you know if we need anything. Thank you.”
“Any time, Olivia.”
Olivia turned and left Harper’s office. As she walked down the hall, Harper’s words rang in her mind.
Six to eight months without treatment, twelve to eighteen with treatment.
An involuntary shudder went through her. Whether to accept treatment or not would be Ethan’s decision, but she knew that Harper was right. Regardless of which decision Ethan made, whatever lay ahead would be excruciating.
In the hours that passed, she saw little of Ethan. Olivia tried to concentrate on her patients, pouring her focus onto her rounds and clinic duty. Still, nothing was enough to pull her attention away from Ethan’s diagnosis.
“Dr. Winchester? Did you hear me?”
Olivia startled, blinking and forcing an apologetic smile for their patient. “I’m sorry, Tyler. I didn’t. But you have my attention now.”
“Tyler was just telling us that the headache started suddenly in the past few days. He had a brief episode of blindness in one eye yesterday,” Tobias supplied, glancing at her curiously.
“Right.” Olivia nodded and flipped through the patient’s charts. “Your scans from Mass General all came back clear. “How long did the blindness last?”
“About six hours. I just said that.”
Olivia sighed. “I’m sorry. Migraines can cause pain localized to one side of the head and visual disturbances, but not total blindness. I think we should run another set of scans to make sure they didn’t miss anything at Mass General. If they come back clean, we’ll start with some labs.”
Their patient looked skeptical. “Is there really any point in doing more scans?”
“We have the best equipment on the market. It may catch something that they missed at the other hospital. Even if everything comes back normal, we don’t want to risk missing a tumor.”
“I guess so.”
Olivia nodded, relieved. “We’ll be back in a few minutes to get you prepped.” She closed the patient’s folder and quietly followed Tobias out of the room.
“You seemed a little distracted in there. Everything okay?”
“Yeah. I just have some stuff going on outside of work. I’ll be fine,” she lied, suspecting Tobias didn’t believe her even if he dropped the issue.
She didn’t see Ethan until the end of their shift. She found him in his office, his attention on his computer screen. “Hi.”
Ethan startled, looking up from the journal he’d been staring at until the words blurred. “Oh. There you are. Ready to go?”
“Yeah. What are you reading?” she asked as she shrugged out of her white coat and replaced it with her jacket.
Ethan hesitated for a long moment. “An article about the average prognosis for glioblastoma multiforme.”
“Oh.” The flat tone to his voice told her everything she needed to know about what he’d read. She fell silent, letting her gaze fall on him. “Ethan, I…”
“What is it?”
The confession rolled from her lips before she had a chance to think twice. “I… showed Harper your scans to get her opinion. She thinks it could be partially operable.”
Ethan’s expression faltered, his brow furrowing in anger. “You showed Harper my charts after I asked you not to?”
She didn’t know why, but Olivia felt her defenses go up. “I took your name off of them. As far as she knows, it’s one of my friends who reached out to me. I know I shouldn’t have gone behind your back, and I’m sorry. But I didn’t think we should just accept that there’s absolutely nothing we can do.”
Visibly frustrated, Ethan pinched the bridge of his nose. “I said that I would tell people myself when I was ready. Getting a second opinion won’t change a thing.”
“But maybe it would give us some ideas. And it did. Harper described a treatment plan that she’s seen some success with. It’s… it’s not much, but it’s something.”
Ethan shook his head and let out a sigh. “With any course of action, the five-year-survival rate is still in the low single digits. I need time to decide what to do. I’m not making a decision based on false hope.”
Her eyes stung with the threat of tears. Refusing to let them fall, Olivia hesitated before speaking again. “I know. But… just think about it. Please?”
Ethan didn’t react right away. After a moment, he nodded so faintly that she almost missed it. “I need some time to think.”
Olivia’s frown deepened when he handed her his car keys. “Where are you going?”
“For a walk. You can take my car home. I’ll be there later. Don’t be worried if I’m late.”
Her expression gave way to one of frustration. “How am I supposed to go home and not worry about you?”
“I don’t know,” Ethan sighed, refusing to meet her eyes. “But I’ll be home later. I need some time to myself.”
“Ethan, just-“ she stopped when he left the room without another word.
This is honestly about to become a full time Bob’s Burgers stan blog because even though I’ve loved that show for years, the hyperfixation I have on it now is REAL
@rookie-ramsey I don't know if you had saw/read what I had submit in @choicesfandomappreciation cause it including with many others name. But anyway your content are all awesome from fics, hc, everything. Wish you all the best. They make my day, provide so much joy and laughter.
Hi. I remember seeing posts during the summer of your struggles to secure a teaching position. I lost track of your profile, but rediscovered it now.
I hope things did improve for you in the last several months. If not, I wish that 2022 is a productive year for you, personally and professionally.
Things actually have improved! I’m still in the same job but a change to my duties has lessened the stress. I haven’t gotten back into Open Heart writing yet so I’m not super active on here, but thank you so much for this message. Happy holidays. 🥰
