no church in the wild

rogue ross. 22

[rxgueross]

A derisive sort of laugh let him. “Responsibilities? No. You’re talking to someone who’s life revolves around dealing. The word responsible doesn’t belong next to me. It’s more like an obligation. I don’t want to get fucked over, so I don’t fuck around.” he shrugged. It made sense to him. He could spend his days out of it, but where was the logic in it. It was fun sure, but that was maybe two out of ten times. The rest you didn’t necessarily remember. He let out a little laugh, it was short and not filled with much emotion, but it was still a laugh. “You don’t strike me as the sort to be professional, ever.” he joked. His dark eyes looking back up at her, he took in the features of her face. A slight curiosity sinking back in once again, it always seemed to creep up around her. “So since, you’ve delved into this area of trying to be…” he was going to say friend, but he wasn’t sure if that was even what she was really doing. “…well friendly, can i ask you a question?” He didn’t wait for an answer, instead just leant his head back once more as he voiced it. “Why do you do this stuff? Not just the ones from tonight. I mean, everything.” he ventured. “I mean, what drove you to it? You seem like someone who could…..make something of yourself.”

His words made a little sense. Then again, she wasn’t in a position to really comment on how he chose to live his life. He had his methods it was clear. Maybe that was what he needed to do. Everyone had methods. Her eyes glistened with something resembling actual glee for a brief moment. “No, I suppose I don’t strike that idea with anyone really.” she agreed. “Downside of being so....well I don’t know how to describe what exactly I am.” she shrugged. Rogue wanted to look away from the gaze he was now landing her with. There was something in it that, didn’t scare her, but made her feel like maybe she was venturing down a bad road. This vague idea of getting to know him, it was a whim, like most of her curiosity driven excursions. But she couldn’t. Instead she found herself watching the way his eyes moved along her face. Swallowing at the question he had set before her. How did she answer that. Be honest? Lie like she normally did? She shuffled, a little awkwardly, trying to get comfortable. The rising sensation of being uncomfortable with the question was sinking in. “I wasn’t born to be something.” she finally spoke. “I was born a something.” she shrugged. There was no emotion in her words, she didn’t care for feeling anything on this matter any more. She’d given up that on the inside a long time ago. “I do them for a lot of reasons. To sleep, to stay awake, to stay sane, to shut them out, the let them in.” she rambled. “My head’s sort of a fucked up place to be. I only stay alive because of how I medicate myself.” she admitted. “I drown the truth in whatever I can get my hands on. Because feeling nothing is better for me then feeling anything. Especially with my head.”

[cockygomez]

[rxgueross]

He’d put together a fire. There was no sense in freezing his ass off out here, then again with Atlas there was never a reason needed to make a fire. The silver lighter clicked open and closed in his hand. The hotel was in an exceptionally wild mood tonight and he figured being in the solitude of the woods beat staying there, which would only end in someone getting a bloody nose from him, or worse. So here he was sat with the light of the flames casting shadows on his face. A bottle of Jack Daniels and his black journal his only company.

Being in the woods in the middle of the night. It could almost be a book written by her. She’d always done this, even back home. There was something comforting in being surrounded by trees. With no one around. At least that was how the night had begun. A flickering light in the distance had caught her attention and of course, Rogue being Rogue, she had to investigate it. What she found however was something she never could have predicted. He looked the exact same. Almost. There was something different about him, but of course there would be. It had been years since Rogue had walked out on him. She was a little lost of the ability to move, or even think. Atlas was here? At the one place she thought she was free.

[rxgueross]

Fletcher grumbled as he shook his head. “Nope. Maybe I’ll tell you on your wedding day or something. Check out the groom you’ll actually have… Or bride.. I don’t remember your preference,” he chuckled, shaking his head. He watched her expression drop, gnawing on his lesser lip. “Well maybe we can make it uncomplicated?”

She full on pulled a pout at him. “Seriously? That’s all I get. That sucks, what’s so bad about it that you just can’t tell me.” she toyed before shrugging. “My preference is whoever knows how to work there shit enough to make me scream.” she rambled. No filter. Not that she’d really ever had one. Her head nodded a little aimlessly. “Trust me, if we could, I’d have done so years back. Unfortunately me and things being uncomplicated never really work out.”

[rxgueross]

Elijah shook his head at the girl, trying to erase the thoughts that tried to manifest in his mind. “No, I don’t though. Dean has every right to throw me away. Hell, anyone that sleeps with me has the right to throw me away. I’m asking them for something, it gives them a hold over me. Honestly, it’s fine.” He sighed as Rogue still sat on him, the fork sitting close to his lips. “I always look like hell,” he corrected her, grumbling softly. Elijah looked between the fork and Rogue before he took the food from the food in one bite. She was right, his taste buds were dancing but he didn’t show it. He let it sit there for a second, to try and brand the flavor on his tongue before he swallowed. “Happy?”

She frowned as he tried to tell her he didn’t. “How can you believe that? No one owns you, but you. No matter how shitty the situation you may be in. Whatever someone’s got on you, it’s always semi-permanent. The side effects might not be but their “claim” on you sure is.” she rambled. Rogue felt like she was only mildly lying. She liked that people actually believed it, but with the shit in her head growing up, she didn’t think that she herself had even an ounce of her own control. “Well, be that as it may, right now you look extra hell, and I don’t mean that in a way to put you down, it’s just a fact.” she pointed out. A grin graced her features as he finally ate the piece of cake. “I mean, it’s better. Now you’re a little sweeter by default.”  she teased, leaning in and placing a brief kiss on his lips. “...but you should still half this thing with me. Maybe then I’d be happy.”

[lookathernow]

[rxgueross]

jasey almost snorted while she nodded her head. “yeah, but i’m sure other’s do as well.. what were your parents like?” she asked softly, not wanting to pry too much into the girl’s life. “sometimes.” she nodded her head at the other. “yeah, tall, piercing blue eyes. like i said, he’s a lawyer. probably pretty bitter,” she chuckled, remember his sense of humor. jasey sighed as she ran a hand over her face. “thanks anyways. i’m going to have to start a search for him anyways.”

rogue shrugged as she thought about it. “my well..... my dad is amazing.” she finally spoke out. “he was the best thing a kid could have asked for....but sometimes the best thing can be suffocating.” she continued. rogue nodded. “ah, business type. not something i go for.” she grinned. “then again, by that, i’m sure he’s brilliant.” she added. “well, maybe giving a call to the front desk could be a good start. check out the check in book, see if he’s on there.”

[rxgueross]

Elijah bit into his lip as he nodded. “Yeah… And I’m sure you know some of them already,” he mumbled, looking down at his hands. “See, I know that’s right. I want that to be right. But he always gets under my skin. Makes me believe that… I deserve someone to care about me or some shit like that even though it will never be him.” Elijah shook his head, hoping to drop the subject. But all of a sudden Rogue was in his lap, his eyes widening at the picture in front of him. His head tilted back in his shock but his mouth snapped shut before she could get close with the fork. “Why are you trying to force me to eat?”

Her head tilted to the side as she listened to him speaking. There was something familiar in his words. Something that took her back to a time when a brown eyed boy made her feel like maybe she wasn’t so alone in everything. “You do deserve that sort of thing.” she told him. “Everyone does. Sometimes we just...we end up in situations where we think it’s what we’ve been looking for but....well it’s not.” she shrugged after her musings. Rogue paused with the fork halfway to his mouth, a pout of sorts forming as she thought about how to word her reply. She didn’t want to outwardly say she suspected he was on some of the same stuff as her. Accusing anyone of being a drug user, even if you were one yourself, it never went down well. “I just....your stomach sounds like it hasn’t had anything for days, and you look like hell, no offence.” she shrugged. “At least let me think I’m doing something good by feeding you. Even if it’s just sugar. It tasted amazing.”

[rxgueross]

“Nope,” Fletcher told her again. “I’m not going to finish it. I would rather face your wrath from this side then the other.” He knew it wasn’t a bad thing that he imagined but still. Apparently her type was not what he thought. “Maybe next time?” He asked, raising an eyebrow. “Why do I get the feeling you don’t like me around here that much, Rogue?”

“Oh come on. Give me something to laugh about, because I’m sure that’s all I’m going to do.” she shrugged, nudging him gently. Her expression dropped however as his next words came out. She had known he’d get suspicious eventually, she’d just counted on it taking longer than it apparently had. “NO, of course I want you around Fletch....it’s just.....I....” she didn’t know what to say. Didn’t know how to say anything. “It’s complicated....”

[rxgueross]

“no they didn’t. amd we weren’t even that religious, my parents are divorced. it was the idea of my step-mothers. thought it would cleanse me.” jasey scoffed as she shook her head. “i don’t need them anymore. they obviously can’t see that i was happy. they don’t get to see me happy anymore.” she sighed as well, giving the girl hopeful eyes. “kai. kai vincent. he’s a lawyer.”

“wow, when it comes to fucked up families, yours sure does meet the requirements.” she mused with a light laugh. she nodded as she spoke about not needing her parents. she could relate to that. “sometimes we’re better off.” she nodded. “kai?” she repeated the name before shaking her head. “nope haven’t come across him. if he’s around this place he’s new enough that i have no clue.” she shrugged. “sorry.”

[rxgueross]

I miss you more than I thought I would…

She didn’t want to interrupt the singing. The sound was soothing, something she didn’t feel very often these days and so she just sat there listening. A smile on her face.

[rxgueross]

Elijah chuckled as the girl explained Dean to a t. “Tell me about it. I don’t understand how someone could be that chiseled. It makes me…” want to melt, he finished to himself. but he couldn’t let himself feel that. Dean was so untouchable, it was like trying to tame a lion. a piece of meat trying to tame a wild lion. “never mind,” he chuckled, trying to keep his voice light. “It’s just the principle of the thing,” Eli sighed, shaking his head. “Trust me, you don’t see what I see.” All he saw was the bags under his eyes and the feeling of hundreds of hands crawling over his skin. There always seemed to be a layer of dirt he could never get off, no matter how hard he scrubbed. “Honestly, I shouldn’t,” he told Rogue, his stomach betraying him once more. “There is so much sugar in that, I’m going to into coma with even a small piece.”

She watched his eyes as he spoke, not finishing his sentence. Part of her felt like she could almost guess his thoughts. “Yeah. A lot of things could go at the end of that.” she shrugged. “But it’s better for everyone when Dean isn’t a part of your life when it comes to all things.....bedroom and romance.” she frowned slightly, not really knowing how to phrase it properly. Romance was the wrong option, Dean wasn’t anything to do with romance, but she figured he’d get what she meant. She gave him a look that said ‘seriously’ before in a few swift movements she was sat on his lap, straddling him, fork in hand and a piece of the cake stuck to it. “Shut up about sugar levels, you sound like a mom. Your stomach is practically begging for it so eat some before I have to make you.” she told him as she tilted his head upwards a little.

[rxgueross]

Fletcher chuckled as he shook his head at his sister. “Seriously? I would have figured you for a more… No wait, I’m not going to go there. Don’t to have an angry sister on my hands,” he teased, reaching out to move a strand of hair away from her face. “Why didn’t you invite me over? We could have binged watched together.”

“What?” she asked, eyebrow raising in a daring tone. “C’mon, you can’t leave your sentence hanging like that. Though I was more of a what?” she asked with a grin. “You’re going to get an angry sister if you don’t finish your words.” She smiled as he pushed the hair out of her face keeping it there as she thought back to how she’d spent it. “Yeah....” she sighed. Inviting Fletch over while she was high as hell wasn’t exactly her first thought. “..maybe next time.”

[rxgueross]

“I love television marathons. Spencer Reid is pretty attractive, I must agree.”

“Ugh 100%.” she grinned. “We should catch one together some time if you’re up for it.” she offered. Rogue figured maybe it couldn’t help to try make some actual friends. It had been long enough of kicking it on her own. “Got any favourites?”

[rxgueross]

“I’ve might have been locked away at a convent when I told my parents about him…” Jasey ran a hand through her hair nervously. “Oh god no, trust me, he’s sex on a stick,” she chuckled, thinking back to their times together. “I have no idea. This was the first place I found after I ran away.”

“A convent? Shit, your parents don’t throw around.” she mused, eyebrow raising slightly, thinking of the lengths her parents had, almost, gone to when it came to her. “Parents are always the bane of everyone’s lives. Until we need them..” she sighed before shrugging. “Well hell, maybe he is around here. Guy got a name? Been here a good few years myself maybe I’ve heard of him.”

[rxgueross]

"You are looking at the future Mrs. Spencer Reid.” she grinned. “Well, I mean, I wish. I stayed up all night with a marathon of Criminal Minds and honestly he has become the true love of my life. How can you not love him, it’s crazy.” she rambled on. “Imma find me a Spencer Reid of sorts. You watch.”

[rxgueross]

“Tell me about it, I literally feel like I’ve been going insane. Especially because my boyfriend… fuck, I need to find him.”

“Wait, you have a boyfriend but you haven’t had some?” she remarked without really thinking the sentence through. “I mean not that I’m judging if he wants to wait or whatever but....y’know what forget it. Is he at the hotel too?”