in the works...

[saamchu]

These are the oldest and most recent pictures I could find of us. There a thousands of thoughts and emotions going on in my mind, and even more things that could be said. Andrew mentioned that it’s supposed to be helpful to write letters, so here I am.

You are dearly missed. Your death has brought everything I believed about life and faith to the surface, and I can gladly say that Christ is truly the Rock on which I stand. Though I am saddened beyond any words can describe, I am thankful and filled with joy knowing that you have entered into the loving arms of our Father. You have entered into the promise. 

You were always honest, and always earnest in any endeavor you committed yourself to. Spending time with you was a riot, and no matter the circumstance we always had a good time. 

Thank you for being you and for being a friend to me and many others.

Farewell Charles.

[saamchu]

The return. #missionaryterri

[saamchu]

The Living God

“It is always shocking to meet life where we thought we were alone. “Look out!” we cry, “it’s alive.” And therefore this is the very point at which so many draw back—I would have done so myself if I could—and proceed no further with Christianity. An “impersonal God”—well and good. A subjective God of beauty, truth and goodness, inside our own heads—better still. A formless life- force surging through us, a vast power which we can tap—best of all. But God Himself, alive, pulling at the other end of the cord, perhaps approaching at an infinite speed, the hunter, king, husband—that is quite another matter. There comes a moment when the children who have been playing at burglars hush suddenly: was that a real footstep in the hall? There comes a moment when people who have been dabbling in religion (“Man’s search for God”!) suddenly draw back. Supposing we really found Him? We never meant it to come to that! Worse still, supposing He had found us!”

-C.S. Lewis, Miracles.

[saamchu]

Anywhere.

Jesus I believe in You And I would go To the ends of the earth To the ends of the earth

[saamchu]

You have never had it. All the things that have ever deeply possessed your soul have been but hints of it—tantalising glimpses, promises never quite fulfilled, echoes that died away just as they caught your ear. But if it should really become manifest—if there ever came an echo that did not die away but swelled into the sound itself—you would know it. Beyond all possibility of doubt you would say ‘Here at last is the thing I was made for.’ We cannot tell each other about it. It is the secret signature of each soul, the incommunicable and unappeasable want, the thing we desired before we met our wives or made our friends or chose our work, and which we shall still desire on our deathbeds, when the mind no longer knows wife or friend or work. While we are, this is. If we lose this, we lose all.

[saamchu]

Take me choose me use me. I'm like a coin in your pocket - spend me as you will.

[saamchu]

at National September 11 Memorial & Museum

[saamchu]

This is the art of celebration

Knowing we're free from condemnation

Praise the One, Praise the One

Who made an end to all my sin

[saamchu]

You have kept count of my tossings; put my tears in your bottle. Are they not in your book? Then my enemies will turn back in the day when I call. This I know, that God is for me. In God, whose word I praise, in the Lord, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I shall not be afraid. What can man do to me? I must perform my vows to you, O God; I will render thank offerings to you. For you have delivered my soul from death, yes, my feet from falling, that I may walk before God in the light of life

Psalm 56:8-13

[saamchu]

Behold, I go forward, but he is not there, and backward, but I do not perceive him; on the left hand when he is working, I do not behold him; he turns to the right hand, but I do not see him. But he knows the way that I take; when he has tried me, I shall come out as gold. ...I have treasured the words of his mouth more than my portion of food.

Job 23:8-10, 12b

[saamchu]

...but the righteous gives and does not hold back.

Proverbs 21:26

[saamchu]

Letting go

In preparation for my first apartment (home) move in 4 years, I am clearing out and throwing away a lot of old things I've gathered over the years.

It's strange how it's still a tiny bit painful to throw away those old, meaningful things... As I prepare to recycle my laptop that is approaching it's 9th year of existence, I cannot seem to get rid of that nagging feeling that I am loosing something personal or a part of me - some old school paper or picture that I forgot to backup. As my pile of old pictures, gifts and trinkets continues to grow, I am forced to face the reality that things must either be thrown away or stored away in a compact, dark box that will likely never be opened again. (The latter is more likely.)

It's as if these items from the past both validate my experience and give weight to the history of my humanity. What was once a faint memory is transformed into vivid images and emotions with the slightest glance at a picture or note. It's also strange that this seems to come as a surprise to me every time I glance back at anything from over four years ago; but perhaps this is because the lag in between each look is so long.

While it is good to remember where I came from, getting rid of these things gives a sense of letting go of the past and pressing on to the future. Press on, Sam!

[saamchu]

Son, you are always with me, and all that is mine is yours.

[saamchu]

at Washington Square Park

[saamchu]

One year! Photo from 5/10/14

[saamchu]

To bear the cross is to wear the crown

The valley of vision

[saamchu]

Though Balak were to give me his house full of silver and gold, I could not go beyond the command of the Lord my God to do less or more.

Numbers 22:18