[sadwhitegirl666]

i caught my dumbass bf responding to some chick he used to talk to and he kept mentioning she was a regular and was being vague. i thot it was weird and put it together that it was probably this chick named paige. so i was like ok what’s this regs name cause like why is he mentioning them so often i thot it sus and he mentioned the name and it was this person he used to fuck or something which i only know from that time i read his messages a few months ago cause i like burned these chicks names into my brain permanently.

so then this bitch asks him if he can be her sober buddy for this formal event we’re going to as a couple and he said something like “idk that i’ll really be there long” like doesn’t go nope my gf and i are coupling but xyz cause if they needed a sober buddy i wouldn’t mind but he didn’t do any of that or mention me just said he didn’t know that he would go and then this bitch was like “ok i guess i won’t go either” and i was on one when i read that message

anyways like 2 days ago we got in this horrible fucking fight and he comes into my job afterwards and apologizes etc then randomly drops that he had a regular not be able to pay their tab like their card got declined and shit and i was like… who tf did that why aren’t you pissed and it’s this fucking bitch again

so anyways i was like my guy if i ever CATCH you slipping on someone you used to fuck and not owning up to it again/being sketch i will throw ur shit outside and light it on fire and go to jail deadass foreeal i am done with this bullshit bc i’ve asked him so many times to just introduce me/prep me for shit bc of my trauma and he doesn’t and instead makes everything sketchier and this lil baby straight up went on his gram unrequested and deleted like 15 chicks post this convo which then he left his fucking phone at home so i checked that shit and his inbox is full of dms with these specific chicks nothing bad but like then heart reacting his selfies and i’m just like why is this man a fucking idiot

[sadwhitegirl666]

it just feels like way too much like everything with him is hard and idk if i should do it anymore

i almost left a few months ago from the other girls all over his inbox thing but now i just feel completely dead inside

[sadwhitegirl666]

i was having bad depression this morning and my bf drove us to the bagel store and drove up on the curb and ripped off the front of my car (which just got fixed from an accident last month) and in response i just started sobbing like truly couldn’t hold it in and asked him to just give me a min and go inside by himself

and then i cried the entire time he was inside about a lot of stuff and he came back out and got in the car and was silent and i didn’t mind tbh bc i had just cried so fucking hard but he didn’t say anything the entire time we’re on the way to his job where i was then gonna have to drive myself home and tbh i was kind of stressed bc i legit couldn’t stop crying the entire time my eyes were still running beyond my control (but i wasn’t like sobbing or anything) and i was concerned about being able to drive

then we get a few blocks from his work and he goes “you kNOW I DON’T WANT TO DRIVE YOUR CAR ANYMORE BECAUSE…” and i cut him off and just started yelling. like i never yell but i yelled so hard i hurt my throat and i’m not proud of it but i was like 1) don’t you ever yell at me when you know i’m already upset and having a bad depression day 2) don’t you dare turn this or my feelings into something about you i’m not mad about the car it just pushed me over the top and i wasn’t yelling or getting mad at him and not once did he even acknowledge or say sorry!! and then he tried to act like i was steamrolling him and his feelings and i was like BRO WTF WHEN DO I GET A CHANCE TO BE HEARD??? I HAD TO YELL FOR HIM TO GIVE A FUCK ABOUT MY FEELINGS. he didn’t even ask if i was ok or anything he just bought me a bagel threw it at me then started yelling at me for no damn reason refusing to take responsibility for scraping my car on every single side and idk i have done nothing but cry all day long

[sadwhitegirl666]

so anyways now i am super done with her and i called our owner and he was kind of like ok this seems like a professionalism thing but straight up it has been so annoying and she has been making me feel uncomfortable bc she doesn’t respond well when i give her critique

[sadwhitegirl666]

ok so i promoted this chick a month ago and as soon as i promoted her she also started a relationship and completely stopped gaf and slacking off/exhibiting prohibited behaviors (i.e. not working and being on her phone, closing 40 mins late when it was slow and her only response was her friends were hanging out, etc.) and kind of acting up. i assumed that’s what was happening but i proceeded to start critiquing behaviors and try to discuss/ask how i could help and it was wasn’t going anywhere

anyways on friday i took her outside and was like a) how is managing going and after listening was like well here’s some behaviors you’re doing that you’ve repeatedly engaged in despite commentary from me and like honestly maybe now is not the time in your life to be manager and it’s gonna be a longer process to get you there which i’m happy to work on with you. but it was a super frustrating convo and she ended up admitting she slacking but then kind of acting like she could turn it around and i was like im just gonna be frank with you do you want to be the person who comes in early because somebody is shitting themselves like do you want to call the cops on the crazy person do you want to tell someone their avo toast looks bad to remake it bc i felt like she just wants to good parts and she smirked and acted all silly goofy about it so i told her we could discuss this after the weekend and she should ask herself if this is what she wants

anyways she was scheduled one closing shift this week and and she didn’t adjust lighting, didn’t let me know they had no ice, straight up didn’t do the important prep thennnnnnnnnnnnnn she fucking has in her bf come in right at close and she comps his tab 50% almost $100 so when i go to check sales and see if they clocked out at 10 she a) did not clock out and had to be reminded to leave b) i texted her and was like yooooooo employee discount is for employees and she didn’t respond

[sadwhitegirl666]

this week has been really bad relationship wise for me and nik is causing me a lot of stress because he’s avoiding doing things to move in and now he’s stressed/couldn’t pay me the money he promised to help me with bills and he’s just being super negative and i told him that while we were on the way to his job because he was being dramatic etc. and i just was like dude you’re being negative af please stop and then he started yelling and it made me have a panic attack while i was driving and it was super shitty and i’m only now feeling better one hour later

[sadwhitegirl666]

sometimes nik does stuff that is super reminiscent of horrible behaviors from men and i can’t shake it off

[sadwhitegirl666]

like idk i have a lot of stress lately and nik is adding so much to it and he’s being super weird about me going to his house

like he’s never let me go to his house but he’s supposed to move in with me in a few days and he hasn’t planned or organized his shit and keeps avoiding it and on top of that he’s doing a lot of stuff that is triggering to me

like he kept throwing all his stuff on the ground so you couldn’t walk in my room and then was being super demanding about having space in the house but he doesn’t pay any bills and i had to harass him to give me $36 for water but my roomie moved out a month ago so i had to pay $1300 in rent by myself plus every other bill and nik has been living in my house and he never cleans which was triggering to me bc every guy i’ve lived with has made me be the sole housekeeper and not helped out and it sucks bc i make way less than nik but i also work way more/have a ton of responsibilities so when i was having a rough week he was adding to it by being dirty as fuck/then expecting me to pay him $20 if we went and got something from the grocery store for dinner and idk there’s not clear cut boundaries

then i went on his computer which i have done every once in awhile when he’s being weird bc of what happened before it just makes me feel better to make sure he is not using his horny twitter and he reactivated it after we had spent all day together cuddling etc. and it upset me bc i know that but he doesn’t but like it’s always after we have a good day or something he’ll randomly reactivate it and he was being a real freak this week saying he was nervous etc. and i just feel ominous like something bad is gonna happen

[sadwhitegirl666]

im genuinely truly gonna leave my bf if he doesn’t stop fucking with this twitter fucking bullshit

[sadwhitegirl666]

nik and i keep getting in dumb fights about the same thing and small stupid shit and i’m really tired this week and now my family is in town and i think nik thinks this is gonna be some romantic fun thing to meet them but it exhausts me

[consecuences]

[sadwhitegirl666]

idk whats wrong with me but its a lot

[animatedtext]

[sadwhitegirl666]

i’m having a depressive episode and it sucks

[sadwhitegirl666]

my roommate finally moved out and i’ve never been happier it feels so good to finally have my house to myself

also he fully just took some of my stuff that i let him use when he moved in like lol why, he took this $70 wire rack that i let him use because he had no furniture when he moved in

and i figured out that this man was so dumb he physically super glued things to the wall like he broke my command strip off the wall and SUPER GLUED it onto the wal

[sadwhitegirl666]

but also there is no reason to trust men they are dumb

[sadwhitegirl666]

i did something so dumb lol