Assorted Salts and Clown Seasonings

Former Little Miss Underpass Trashfire 2017, current menace (They/Them Latin American)

[saltedclowns]

I'm being queer at 3 AM and I've had disappointingly few influencers try to break into my house.

[soundoftheirwings]

Gotta tell you guys something wild in the Chinese fan sphere

So some fanartist drew a “sexy” (read: booby) version of a (cartoon) character who is traditionally very non-sexualised. Fans of the character got mad about it because it’s kind of groundbreaking how that character is written and portrayed and this art totally ignores the entire point of the character. They demanded the art be deleted. In response to that other people said, well what the fanartist did may be distateful but they have every right to draw what they’re into. The two sides fight for days and each starts a harassment campaign and even report their “opponents’” accounts.

So far so typical. But things eventually come to a head and they decide that this will be settled by votes - not through a poll. Through donations to a children’s education charity via each side’s portal. Whoever can get the highest amount of donation wins.

And that is how this charity received over 1 million in donations in three days lol. Oh btw the “freedom of expression” side won by a landslide (960k to 40k)

[tlbodine]

From now on this is how all petty fandom disputes should be settled.

[flagellant]

[mellifexfarm]

bring your ugly to work day

[saltedclowns]

I'd just like to take this time during Pride Month to shill for big oil with a little off-the-cuff statement.

"Hello fellow [APPROPRIATED SLANG]: Buy plastic. Consume plastic. Become plastic. Feel it in your bones. Return to the Earth and remain untouched for eons. Praise be to Exxon Mobile."

[cranberry-branflakes]

which heart did you get when you liked this post?

rainbow flag

lesbian flag

gay flag

bisexual flag

pansexual flag

asexual flag

aromantic flag

transgender flag

non binary flag

intersex flag

Voting ended onJun 8

when reblogging, please add the pride tags I've included! if not, anybody liking your reblog will only see regular tumblr hearts :)

[saltedclowns]

That one evangelical spam bot is working HARD to make sure I never go anywhere NEAR a church in the replies.

[the-muppet-joker]

I am in despair from losing my son. I cannot accept that he would just run away to be a little circus boy. I am enraged. Whatever. Who needs him. I was a terrible father anyway

[saltedclowns]

I am fully convinced that US Republicans just hate anyone else's happiness. I say this not as a leftist, but as someone with eyes and a functional memory.

[pukicho]

I’m literally in my beast form going to bed

[pukicho]

[pukicho]

Stop calling the crumbs shit. None of you realize how hard it is to photoshop crumbs falling mid-air via a birds-eye perspective. They don't just have 'mid-air granola crumbs' on google, no one has ever thought of photographing that before. I had to color a bunch of boulders brown. I had to find images of various boulders and color them brown, whnich yeah, when I say it out loud, does make it sound like a funny euphemism for shit, but it's really more of a light brown color and it took a lot of time and effort, so stop.

[twentychildreninawashingmachine]

i thought they were bees.

[pukicho]

oh my fucking god. oh my god. it can't possibly look like that to you

[saltedclowns]

Why is it a vertical blur and not radial

[the-muppet-joker]

My ex wife and I are devastated. Every day we wake up at 5am and search for him in the streets. Our son. We search all day, looking for him in bushes, under cars, in the neighbors' garages. I always feel like he's right around the corner. I keep thinking he will come back home. We set humane traps for him all around my apartment complex, using a giant lollipop as bait, as that is the snack children like the most. I feel fucking hollow. Come home, my son. Come home.

[saltedclowns]

Should have sprung for the inhumane traps smh

[theabigailthorn]

I made a Mii of you hope that's alright

hell yeah

i do like mozzarella lemonade and honey!

[strange-aeons]

I'm very tired and briefly considered the possibility that British people enjoy a weird delicacy called "mozzarella lemonade"

[mangled-by-disuse]

get a load of this guy who's never had mozzarella lemonade

[strange-aeons]

[atuats-sidechick]

make mozzarella lemonade

mozzarella

lemon juice

lemon peel

water

sugar

honey

Voting ended onMay 18

[saltedclowns]

Team Lemon Peel, let's really fuck this shit up

[the-tenth-arcanum]

ever since I was a little girl I knew I wanted to be into shit no one cares about

[395nm]

Fuck Meyer-Briggs whatever typology. This INTFP shit is only for redditors up their own asses to substitute for a personality. Use my new typology instead!

Your ideal environment is:

Hot/Cold

Wet/Dry

Bright/Dark

Loud/Quiet

[395nm]

Fuck Meyer-Briggs whatever typology. This INTFP shit is only for redditors up their own asses to substitute for a personality. Use my new typology instead!

Your ideal environment is:

Hot/Cold

Wet/Dry

Bright/Dark

Loud/Quiet

[revoltingchild]

[mxlabradorite]

I will reblog this every Christmas season I’m on tumblr.

[drunkygoesonadventures]

It’s beginning to look a lot like shit scram

[saltedclowns]

Not even five minutes into the DLC and the rival has already boasted about how helpful they are immediately before instigating a completely unnecessary conflict in which they were less than useless.

I was really hoping Urbain/Taunie would just take a backseat for the DLC, they're just so painfully unlikeable.

[purpleisdebeste]

I’m sorry Orpheus i was too harsh on you…

[purpleisdebeste]

i was in the physics lab today and we were working with lasers, so the Lab Freaks (legal name) were being very careful to stress that we Do Not Turn Around or Look Behind Us because we’ll get extremely blinded by the power of high strength lasers

and i’m not gonna lie it was actually extremely hard to resist turning around. i misjudged orpheus it turns out this isnt extremely easy actually

[purpleisdebeste]

okay i’ll be honest i 100% looked back at the lasers. actually multiple separate lasers multiple different times. they were pretty

and i didnt get blinded. so clearly lab safety isnt real and you should always risk it cus taking risks is awesome #gambling

but uh. my ass is NOT making it out of the underworld 🔥🔥🔥

[overnightshipping]

[notmusa]

🚐 van man