ruined

Sasha Parker. 16. broken

[bruelarson]

[sashaxparker]

nathan-douglas:

“Mm, being an actual real life adult sucks. I’m glad I’ll never officially be one.” He muttered offhandedly before reaching out to grab more snow in his hands. He didn’t know if he could handle being ordered around by people who didn’t know how to deal with him. The only career he could see himself having was a career criminal, maybe a serial killer. That thought made him stiffen slightly before swallowed pushing it away from his mind when Sasha asked how old his brother was “Oh, we are twins. I don’t know who is older.”

“You won’t?” Sasha wondered if you could really just decide a thing like that. She had this idea in her head about the years going by and becoming older and wiser and more boring as they did. Ageing didn’t seem appealing. Though some days she did feel older than her years. “Oh, cool.” She smiled when they said they were twins. “I always thought that would be fun, to have a twin.”

[sashaxparker]

perfectingfailure:

Nodding at that he glanced away before smiling a little at a thought he had. When she went on he tossed his head slightly “Don’t we all kind of wish for that at one point or another, several times in our lives.” Turning away this time he started to walk again “Well, have a good day. I have to go meet someone for dinner, I don’t think chatting up a teenager is going to fly with them, if I am late.”

Sasha nodded, feeling quite deflated at the thoughts that started to enter her mind. She wished she could just have normal thoughts but it seemed too hard these days. As he turned away, she nodded. “Oh... oh, um... I...” She babbled, folding her arms as she shuffled a few steps backwards, feeling annoyingly uncomfortable. “Yeah, you too.”

[sashaxparker]

nathan-douglas:

He shook his head, feeling a bit bad for her. Or maybe just everyone in general, who got older. Most people let themselves be fooled by the illusion of adulthood. That they had to be mature. Nathan had never had that burden. He had never had to deal with anyone killing his inner child. Though at the same time he had to grow up far quicker than most that were his age. Contently he continued what he had been doing. He loved this time of year. He had always loved Christmas, though of course in the last seventeen years his Christmas’ had not been anything worth enjoying. But still, his love for this time of year had always remained. “He’s always busy.” Nathan said. Thinking about how Austin treated him, or just how Austin was always working. 

He realized in all these months Austin spent more time thinking about how to deal with him, and not really getting to know him “Hopefully he stops being busy soon, so we can enjoy our time together.” He wondered how much time this all would last, where he could spend time with his siblings. Nathan had to guess that it would probably not last as long he would like. He was dead. And he had no idea what that really meant. As Sasha spoke again he glanced toward her and put on another smile “Yeah.” He answered, not wearing much winter clothing himself, just a few layers of shirts with a hoodie on top and a pair of skinny jeans he had found during the summer. “A brother!?  We both have brothers. That’s cool. Is he your older brother?”

Sasha didn’t want to think about her brother much right now. She’d used to idolise him so much... and now things were different. She hadn’t heard from him in days.. maybe it was longer. She supposed everything changed as you got older but Sasha found change hard. Especially now. With.... everything. “My brother’s always busy too.” She said when he seemed to get excited about them both having that in common. She giggled. “He is, yeah.. what about yours?”

[sashaxparker]

perfectingfailure:

Seeing he had somewhat killed the mood, he was debating whether or not to try and be more cheery. Jackson listen as she went on before giving a casual little shrug “I guess it can be see that way, right?” He smiled then “Though I suppose this year is hitting people a little more hard than before, for other reasons besides it being cold.” Jackson was suddenly curious of what Angelina had been doing at the moment, it was weird how distant she had become “Well, maybe it’s that this time of year doesn’t offer adults much, like it does children. No days off. No time to stop make a snowman.”

Sasha made to turn away but he kept talking and so she looked back up at him. She managed a smile when he did. “Yeah. I suppose so.” Sasha never knew what to say about it all. She found it tough to form the words sometimes, now at least as she never used to have this problem. It was like everything got stuck - much like herself. “You’re right. Makes me wish I was a little younger again.” Though she could manage to find.... a tiny bit of excitement. Somewhere. She’d always loved the time of year after all, it had been her favourite since she was a kid.

[sashaxparker]

musiccommenceswherespeechends:

Watching her for a moment before she spoke he tossed his head then shrugged “Though, let’s be honest, most things in the world can be really scary.” He laughed a little then watching as she bit at her nail before looking away a moment later.  “Though it’s definitely not something I envy, being someone who was revived. What secrets do they have. If any.”

Sasha chewed gently on her bottom lip, shrugging a little. Her thoughts sort of wandered. She knew what fear was like and she just desperately wished to forget. “Yeah... I guess you’re not wrong there.” She gave a little sigh. “I think it would be so... weird.” She made a face, not sure how else to describe it. “Imagine being dead and then just.... not...”

[silverduckie]

[sashaxparker]

perfectingfailure:

Giving Sasha a concerned look before he glanced away, shaking his head at this “Some people would say differently.” Shaking his gloved hand he then dropped it to his side “Maybe I would think differently, If I were a kid again and had the time to enjoy it more.”

“Oh.” Sasha deflated just a little bit. It seemed a lot of people weren’t that excited right now - her included most of the time but she did love the look of snow. “I guess.. it seems like the older people get, the less exciting it gets?”

[sashaxparker]

nathan-douglas:

Nathan gave a small nod patting his hands gently over the ball of snow in his hand “Really.”  Looking at her he blinked, a little confused fr a moment before giving a smile “It is, really cool.” Going back to playing with the snow Nathan didn’t notice her looking around. When she spoke he looked toward her once again “No? Oh. Guess you have outgrown it. You were able to enjoy it as a kid.” Nathan scooped up some more snow, grinning sweetly, softly as he made another ball from it “ A Snowman wouldn’t be bad! I really should! I- I-” He laughed a bit “My brother and I used to make snowmen all the time. A snowman army.” Lifting up another handful of snow he started to make another ball “He’s too busy to do stuff like this. I’ll just have to build one by myself. Maybe one day he’ll join me. I hope.” Placing the ball next to the others he looked at Sasha “Do you have any siblings?”

Sasha gave a little nod when he said she’d outgrown it. “Yeah. Maybe.” She felt older somehow lately, despite her sixteen years. Things just felt heavy, like she was suffocating, and she didn’t have it in her for much cheer or Christmas spirit. She used to love winter, too. Sasha moved to sit down on a bench nearby, wiping off some of the snow, and folded her arms as she listened to him. He seemed content enough with her not saying a whole lot, which was nice enough. “Yeah?” She remembered when her own brother had been around enough to do all that stuff with, when she’d been nothing but an innocent kid. “I’m sure he will when he’s less busy?” She tried to be positive but she shrugged a little. “I’d offer to help but I left my gloves at home.” Sasha scrunched her nose a little bit, before glancing down at his question. “Uh, yeah. I have a brother.”

[sashaxparker]

musiccommenceswherespeechends:

Michael thought about what she said for a moment, not really knowing what it was like to have to deal with something like this was going to get in the way of how he felt about all of this overall. The dead were back, and it was unnatural. But to treat them so poorly after returning from death was certainly not the answer he was expecting “I doubt it will be that simple to change it though. They’ve already made the mistake.” Staring at Sasha for a moment he frowned slightly “I don’t imagine it’s the best feeling in the world, being hunted.” 

Sasha didn’t feel quite connected to this moment as she talked to him. It was a strange feeling, one she couldn’t quite explain. She shook her head. “Yeah... it sounds really scary.” She chewed at one of her nails absently. At least she had one thing to be grateful about - she wasn’t dead or being hunted down like an animal.

[perfectingfailure]

“Oh, look at that, it’s snowing.” Jackson said as he brought a hand up to catch some of the snow that fell from the afternoon sky. He didn’t really enjoy this time of year.

[sashaxparker]

“It’s lovely!” Sasha needed something to smile about and she had always loved the look of the snow falling and settling on the houses and gardens.

[sashaxparker]

nathan-douglas:

Packing some snow into a ball when he heard Sasha he glanced over and grinned a bit. He then looked back to the snowball and packed more snow onto it “Sooo much fun.” He says, a little excitedly. “It’s the first time i’ve gotten to be around snow since I was seven years old.” He wasn’t even bothered by the cold. He just wanted to enjoy this before it was ripped away from him, like everything else was. And had always been. He had learned to enjoy things while he had the chance, for as long as he could because it could be gone in a moment. Even if sometimes it might make him seem like a child, or even stupid. Nathan knew he was neither of these things “Why aren’t you having fun, too?”

“Really?” Sasha smiled, somehow brightened up a little bit just by the sight of him seemingly having so much fun - and not seeming embarrassed or held back about it. “That’s cool then.” Lucky for him it had snowed then. “Oh.” Sasha gave a little shrug at his question, glancing around the park briefly. Maybe looking for an escape route in case she needed one. “I guess I’m not really in the mood to be honest. Why don’t you make a snowman?”

[allroadsrp]

Staring up into the night sky Nathan watched the white snowflakes fall toward the snow covered ground “Hmm.” Squinting a little he tilt his head “First time feeling snow in a while.” He muttered, holding up his hands to catch the snowflakes in his hands. With a cute little grin he smiled down at the water building up in his palms. A stab of excitement hit him then. Tilting his head up he stuck his tongue out to catch a few snowflakes. A few seconds later he started to run across the park, still almost childlike. Then he dropped the ground and started to pull snow toward him, crushing some of the snow into snowballs and setting them beside him.

[sashaxparker]

Sasha was feeling quite out of it. Her mind was disconnected and she was feeling sort of like she wasn’t all here. She’d gone out for a walk to clear her mind but it wasn’t truly helping, though the clear sky was pretty to look up at as she went. She just wished she could feel like herself again... what if she never did? It was snowing now and she pulled her scarf up over her head to protect her hair. It looked pretty and it did strangely make her feel a little better. She came to the park and noticed she wasn’t alone suddenly. It set her on edge at first but she couldn’t help but chuckle as she watched the other having a good time with the snow. He looked carefree. “Having fun?” She asked, though not really sure why she struck up a conversation.

[ellefanningcompilation]

[sashaxparker]

musiccommenceswherespeechends:

“Well, there’s definitely not a reason to be trusting.”  Michael shrugged too, guessing that whatever the dead were doing coming back to life. It was something huge.  “People have a right to be wary of unnatural things. Of course, they don’t have a right to then lock those things up and torture them.”  Michael laughed, lifting his pencil up off the sketch pad and flicked the end toward her, then twist the tip in his fingers “People need to be reminded that these revived have rights. Don’t you think?”

Sasha nodded in agreement. She supposed she needed to think more as if it were her in that scenario. If she had died and somehow returned. Sasha sort of wished she would do the former and not the latter some days. “It’s pretty horrible... but I’m, uh, hoping things might change. Eventually.. maybe.” She sighed. “I can’t even imagine how scared they must all be feeling.”

[jenniferniven]

[sashaxparker]

musiccommenceswherespeechends:

With her answer he smiled a bit and lift a hand up to his head, patting it over the top before scratching the back of his head and looking away  “Yeah, people seem to be a lot more paranoid about others.”

Sasha shrugged. She still didn’t know what she thought about the ‘dead’ situation and she wasn’t even sure how it could be real. “Yeah, I guess there’s probably reason enough for people to be wary.” Not that she agreed with some of the tactics.