There Are No Gods Here

The Propaganda your weird uncle warned you about. Kinky, NSFW, and Cute Animal Posting. 28F Bi. Let's massacre the 1%. The fascists have the outfits, but the communists have the music.

[homunculus-argument]

The most terrifying thing about all sorts of AI thingamagigs isn't that they're stupid as shit, it's the fact that there nonetheless are people stupid enough to benefit from them. Artificial intelligence isn't intelligent in any passable way, but when you're the type of motherfucker operating on pure natural home-grown stupidity, and by default on your own you're wrong 60-80% of the time, of course an overcomplicated word predictor that's wrong 20-90% of the time is going to feel like a goddamn oracle.

Artificial intelligence gives idiots who are too uncreative to come up with original thoughts the same access to brand new and novel idiotic ideas as more innovative, creative idiots naturally have. Nature was wise enough to not grant them this power, and we are currently finding out why.

[homunculus-argument]

The only true way to immortality is to say so much weird shit that your words will forever live rent-free in other peoples' heads. Like the person who decided to string together the sequence of words "shaking like a chihuahua shitting out a peach stone." Like why did you make me read that. It emerges in my head regularly, whenever I least expect it and the situation needs it the least.

[homunculus-argument]

A three-circle venn-diagram where the circles are "sex workers", "the furry community", and "people working in morgues". I don't know what the overlap parts are.

[flufflogic]

Fourth circle needed: IT workers

[homunculus-argument]

You say that with such confidence that I am compelled to trust your vision. Personally I have no idea where this is going.

[trytocallmecal]

i'd say the overlap between "sex workers" and "people who work in morgues" is probably "seeing naked strangers a lot"

[homunculus-argument]

"professional handling of bodies of strangers"?

[homunculus-argument]

If someone's being loud and needlessly noisy on the street below your apartment and you happen to have an ice cube tray that makes ice cubes roughly the size of a tennis ball, and you chuck one down at them from your balcony, what are the odds of ever being caught? Like can they even prove that they correctly remember which balcony it was launched from, and the attempted murder weapon will melt before they can do anything about it.

[friendlyghostsandmonsters]

MAN you'd hate to have me as a neighbor. I sing so loud at 3AM from the 6th floor that the whole buiding hears it.....

[wildliferehabstudent]

...why do you do that?

[friendlyghostsandmonsters]

Because I am unfortunately awake during those hours and every single minute I'm awake I listen to music. I normally use headphones at night, but recently my headphones broke soooo...the neighbors are getting quite a concert till I fix it or get a new one.

[wildliferehabstudent]

You're waking everyone in your apartment building at 3 am because your headphones don't work?

[friendlyghostsandmonsters]

I....don't think I'm waking anyone to be perfectly honest.

Our directly next door neighors throw soil at people's balcony at night...so I don't think my singing's doing anything.

[homunculus-argument]

I think your house is the place that the "oh my god I could never live in a flat, I would kill myself if I was surrounded by neighbours at all times" people think about when they imagine what it would be like to live in an apartment complex.

[feralratboye]

man I just can't even process the lack of consideration towards other people ...

[homunculus-argument]

I can! Back when I was still living at mom's and was working a 3-shift job, my mom and sister fully agreed that just because I was working night shift from 10 pm to 6 am and buying their damn groceries, I'm not entitled to uninterrupted sleep if my sister wants to sing and play the piano loud as shit at 2 pm. Being expected to wait a few more hours while I sleep would be torture for her.

With neighbours who are strangers, I can at least trust that other people (who are also strangers) won't just automatically side with whoever I have beef with, out of a default assumption that I specifically am always wrong (and therefore whoever I disagree with must be in the right, no matter how convoluted the reasoning).

I would rather fight a thousand neighbours than ever try to negotiate with family again.

[homunculus-argument]

I've got to look up every possible way to sew hidden, concealed and non-obvious pockets and other such storage caches in all of my clothing, and then have as many of those as I can fit in every item in my wardrobe. Trying to get as much hidden storage space on my person as possible. Carrying around a backpack's worth of shit without carrying a bag of any sort.

Getting bored while waiting for the bus and just casually pulling a goddamn sewing kit out of my sleeve to start doing needlework on my jeans, like hey hold on where the fuck did you just pull that shit from. Equipping shit from my secret inventory.

[scarlettswitch9]

I have a coat that I can carry 7x footlong subways sandwiches, my phone, purse, 4x 500ml bottles of juice and a portable power bank in Simultaneously.

It doesn't even look bulky when full.

I use it exclusively for bringing food into the cinema and going on budget airlines with ridiculously low baggage allowances. I paid it with cargo pants that have 6+ deep pockets.

They haven't started regulating pockets, yet!

I fully recommend coats / outfits like this just for the thrill of being able to pull out a string of increasingly unlikely things like a clowns handkerchief trick, or one of those movie scenes where they demand the good guys hand over "all their weapons. No, ALL of them".

The joy of watching people face as you pull out 4 people's lunch, a Nintendo switch, it's docking station, and 2 board games before you get to your first aid kit is like a drug honestly. 100/10 everyone should definitely do this whenever able.

[homunculus-argument]

I could not find a better quality template of this scene to save my life, but I needed to make this anyway.

[mintbees]

steam repeatedly notifying you that a friend is booting up a game thats clearly not cooperating feels like ur sitting inside and someone outside keeps trying to rev up a lawnmower

[mintbees]

[homunculus-argument]

I've got to look up every possible way to sew hidden, concealed and non-obvious pockets and other such storage caches in all of my clothing, and then have as many of those as I can fit in every item in my wardrobe. Trying to get as much hidden storage space on my person as possible. Carrying around a backpack's worth of shit without carrying a bag of any sort.

Getting bored while waiting for the bus and just casually pulling a goddamn sewing kit out of my sleeve to start doing needlework on my jeans, like hey hold on where the fuck did you just pull that shit from. Equipping shit from my secret inventory.

[scarlettswitch9]

I have a coat that I can carry 7x footlong subways sandwiches, my phone, purse, 4x 500ml bottles of juice and a portable power bank in Simultaneously.

It doesn't even look bulky when full.

I use it exclusively for bringing food into the cinema and going on budget airlines with ridiculously low baggage allowances. I paid it with cargo pants that have 6+ deep pockets.

They haven't started regulating pockets, yet!

I fully recommend coats / outfits like this just for the thrill of being able to pull out a string of increasingly unlikely things like a clowns handkerchief trick, or one of those movie scenes where they demand the good guys hand over "all their weapons. No, ALL of them".

The joy of watching people face as you pull out 4 people's lunch, a Nintendo switch, it's docking station, and 2 board games before you get to your first aid kit is like a drug honestly. 100/10 everyone should definitely do this whenever able.

[homunculus-argument]

Me, watching you go balls deep into William The Free-Use Slut because your long-distance open relationship girlfriend just walked in and you don't want her finding out that you already got that dick piercing that she specifically told you not to get: Hmm. Interesting use of Free Will.

[ceruleanheaven]

month starting on a monday we have no excuse guys lets get to work and lock the fuck in

[ceruleanheaven]

yk its actually very chic and avant garde to start on tuesday the second

[ceruleanheaven]

many claim theres nothing more subversive and revolutionary than starting on wednesday the third

[ceruleanheaven]

there are simply no words in the english language that can describe starting on thursday the fourth. thats how iconic it is

[ceruleanheaven]

choosing to start on friday the fifth. i just think its very inspiring

[ceruleanheaven]

lets all kill ourselves

[abouquetofdaylillies-deactivate]

Pre-menstrual depression is always depicted as like "He He! I had a box of icecream bars and cried while watching the Titanic!" But in reality, it's more like, "I'm standing the edge of an abyss. There is nothing good inside of me, I'm filled with rage and desperation."

It's crazy that being told how to deal with that is never a part of anyone's menstrual sex education.

[headspace-hotel]

This has already been said in the notes, but if PMS causes extreme depression and even suicidal ideation, that is in fact something that most people do not experience and it can be treated

Like for the majority it really is "oh i'm hungrier and moodier than usual"

^this should be a part of sex education so the point still stands

[godesssiri]

I went to my doctor after I was walking to work one morning and saw a bus coming and actually took a step to throw myself in front of it before I pulled myself together. Later that day I started bleeding and was literally like someone flipped a switch and I didn't feel suicidal anymore. Which made me feel like I was loosing my mind because who goes from 'I want to throw myself in front of a bus' to 'I'm perfectly fine' just like that? I did some research, I went to the doctor and described my feelings, he looked me in the eye and gently asked what I thought it was, I said I'd read about PMDD and I thought it might be that, he said 'I think so too' and wrote a prescription.

If, before you get your period, you feel furiously angry, suicidal, irritated by every tiny thing to the point you want to murder someone, stuck in a black hole you'll never escape from. If you are experiencing extreme emotions for what seems like no good reason, especially if you get your period and those extreme emotions just go away. You're probably not just PMSing , you may have PMS's feral big sister PMDD and it's treatable.

Also this is something that can develop as you get older. So if you used to get normal PMS but what I wrote above sounds more like your norm now then don't just write it off as regular PMS.

[fagstaynight]

(getting a taste of my own medicine) actually this is okay. Is this what you guys have bene whining about? Jesus christ

[shroomshroomm]

[burnazog]

[thegadaboutgirl]

One more for the collection. Book is Stars at Last by Jessica Jocelyn

[homunculus-argument]

The Odyssey but retold as a low-stakes modern adventure of one guy out with his girlfriend leaving the bar with his buddies to do just one (1) simple thing real quick, it'll take like 15 minutes tops, he'll be right back, but then some bullshit happens and the trip keeps getting more complicated as more bullshit keeps happening while he just tries to get back to the bar because he promised his girlfriend that he'd get back and he knows that she's still there because she told him she'd wait there.

And by the time he finally gets back it's almost 3 am and the bar is about to close while she's sitting there stone cold sober, surrounded by 5 drunk guys unsuccessfully trying to convince her to give up on waiting for him and go home with one of them instead. And the guy shows up to proceed to beat the shit out of them before explaining himself to her like hey sorry bullshit kept happening, my phone fell into a storm drain and my wallet got stolen when I was trying to find someone who'd borrow me a phone so I could call and

[thekijs]

His girlfriend had been fending off the 5 drunk guys for most of the evening by explaining that even if she was going to ditch her boyfriend, she can't possibly leave without finishing her beer, which she is keeping perpetually full via careful sleight of hand where she's just pouring it back and forth into and out of the pitcher.

However the drunk guys are also drinking, and eventually she can't afford to buy another pitcher for the table so she can't keep up the ever-full beer glass trick. At this point she has to resort to setting up the pool trick shot that she's never seen anyone but her boyfriend pull off, and says she'll leave with whoever manages the shot first.

That buys her another hour or so and then, finally, her boyfriend makes it back. He looks like shit, hair down and just a mess, he's wearing an entirely different jacket that he got from an alley, and barely recognizable—especially to 5 guys who've been drunk for hours now. He lurks for a minute, finds out what's going on, and proceeds to pull off the trick shot first try. Throws the jacket off, fixes his hair with a hair tie his girlfriend lends him, finally looks like himself again, and THEN beats the shit out of them with the pool cue.

[adz]

reddit is having a glitch where it puts the wrong captions over photos and it’s the only thing i care about right now

[dietspam16]

[blackjame]

[homunculus-argument]

The fun thing about finnish is that the way you ask for things in a polite way has been in-baked into the suffixes you use, so you don't have to use many words when few do trick. Like asking someone "could you give me [-]" is "voisitko antaa" in written and some variation of "voisiksä antaa" in spoken dialects*, but instead of asking "could you", the polite polite way to ask is "haluaisitko", not as can you, but would you want to. The tone distinction is so clear that asking someone "could you [do thing]" instead of "would you want to [do thing]" is less of a polite request and more of instruction - someone's gotta do it, and the task is being assigned to you.

On the other hand, dropping out the conditional out of the question turns the tone into a passive-aggressive threat. If someone tells you "stop that" as an imperative, "lopeta", that's a command. Asking in conditional, could you stop that, "voisitko lopettaa" is a polite request. "Haluaisitko lopettaa", would you like to stop that, is so polite that depending on the tone it might be sarcastic politeness that indicates hostility.

But asking someone "do you want to stop that", "haluatko lopettaa tuon" is a matter of "do you want to stop doing that voluntarily, or do you want me to stop you." By physical force, if necessary.

* the different form varies depending on what first and second person pronouns are used in the specific dialect. This is a whole another rabbit hole so for shortcut I'm doing the examples in the southern finnish dialect that I have grown up speaking

[kuivamustekala]

Since I use it a bunch in my speech, I also want to shout out "viitsisitkö antaa". I don't think there's a proper english word to translate it with, but the closest approximation of the meaning is "could you be bothered to give me" - however while the tone of the translation could easily be read as passive aggressive, if you're just saying it politely, it moreso has this tone of, like... "if you would be so inclined I'd appreciate it".

Which sounds like pretty dramatic appeasement behaviour when I write it out like that but it's also just a nice, polite request, pretty much on par with the "haluaisitko".

[kevytmaitohorsma]

One more option is to state "you wouldn't have x" (ei sulla ois x:ää) and that's somehow interpreted as a polite request

But the one thing we don't have is "please". The word doesn't exist here.

[homunculus-argument]

You can certainly say "you wouldn't happen to have a [thing] that I could borrow?" in english, too, but I do like how in finnish, the latter half of the sentence is not stated out loud, just implied. You don't word that question like that unless you're asking whether you could borrow it. Which also gives the other person the opportunity to soft launch a "no" by pretending to not notice the implied part. So a conversation can go two ways, it's either:

"Hey wou wouldn't happen to have a hammer?" [Can I borrow your hammer?] "Yeah, what do you need it for?" [You can. What are you working on?]

Or it can go like this:

"Hey wou wouldn't happen to have a hammer?" [Can I borrow your hammer?] "I do own one, yes." [I am ignoring your implied request. Whatever you want to borrow it for, I don't want to let you.] "Can I borrow it?" [I am ignoring your implied rejection. I need to borrow it.] "What do you need it for?" [I will not let you have it unless I know what you want to do and approve of it.]

I don't know how much of this kind of thing is just finnish culture, though, and how much of it is just how neurotypical people universally talk. But the implication waltz is definitely a big part of finnish conversation style.

[byjove]

*hits the joint* In the Harry Potter universe, Merlin is canonically a Hogwarts alumni and a Slytherin, which is impossible because Merlin predates the existence of Hogwarts by centuries. Of course, JK Rowling didn’t know that because she is a dumb bitch. I’m sorry. Misogynistic phrasing. She is a willfully ignorant and hateful, deeply unlikable and ill-informed, untalented and unspeakably cruel…..person. Seriously, how could you write a series about British wizards without truly understanding THE British wizard. Anyway, Merlin would never be able to attend any sort of organized schooling. He’s definitely self-taught in every universe because he’s the most powerful wizard ever AND he’d have been expelled from any institution before he stepped through the door. The only reason they haven’t escorted him away from Camelot is because he can see the future and he is kind of like the king’s dad. I was so disappointed by BBC Merlin. I turned it on and I was like “What the fuck is this shit, where is my perverted old man?”