Not to find a reason,
but to decide on one.
Raison d'être made,
and not simply
stumbled,
upon --
that, I can accept freely,
but,
I do wonder
about the importance
given to
going at that making,
alone, and,
I wonder if the distinction
between searching for,
and creating,
clarifies too little,
or complicates
too much --
to create something
within your own soul
is simply to search within
instead of without --
and to search within
is still to wade slow
through all the things
that have made me --
all my love and all my hurt --
not only what I've felt
but have been made to feel,
in all my meetings
with the hearts of others,
so,
why would I make,
or search, alone?
We, unfortunately,
are meant to be,
together --
at our most base level,
are meant to lean on,
and rely on,
one another --
so of course,
while only I can decide,
with finality,
what my own reason
for being, is,
part of me knows
it must look out,
to forge within --
part of me knows,
whether I like it or not,
that people are the mirror
through which
I see myself, reflected --
that,
sometimes, in another,
I might find a new perspective
on what I want,
or who and how I am,
that I could never see,
alone --
that
part of my creation
of what I choose my meaning
to be,
comes from what I decide
to take in,
and what I decide to take
to heart --
that,
If I allow myself to sit
in all the hate for self,
taught to me
by all the people
who'd cast me
aside,
but,
if I choose to sit with
the love that I
can, and have been,
given,
I might find the peace,
safety, and clarity,
to finally one day decide
what it matters to me
the most,
to be --
vaporwave
blakekathryn
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s-u-f-j-a-n-s-t-e-v-e-n-s
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