indubitably. 🩶

Fed up and chaotic, PhD. Unapologetically Cam-coded. I don't believe in OT3s. 🪿🔔🔞

[scholar-hect]

I wasn’t planning to keep a masterlist. After the Great Writer’s Block of 2014-2018, I actually wasn’t planning to write anything ever again. But as I’ve now got nine* published TLT fics and several more in various stages of completion, I suppose a list is due. Split by fandom (well... TLT vs. everything else), then by fic series. 

* I wrote this post in 2023. My work count has grown considerably since then. 😇

--

THE LOCKED TOMB

Unless otherwise stated, everything below is Camilla/Palamedes, and yes, the slash does mean romance, per long-standing fandom convention and the AO3 FAQ.

No, But to the Gate

An interwoven series of works set within the same world. Can be read in any order you choose, or as standalones.

(i carry it in] - M, 21k - worldbuilding and canon-compliant missing scenes. Camilla is no adept but she will raise Palamedes anew if it’s the last thing she does.

a map with your name for the capital - T, 8k - pre-canon. Camilla suffers a fracture. Palamedes suffers a realisation.

fortune’s fool and fortune’s darling - G, 2.5k - post-canon. Nobody (ie. everybody) knows Camilla Hect is married.

anywhere i go you go, my dear - E, 4.5k - POV redux of a scene from i carry it in. 

3:2 spin-orbit resonance - E, 4k - canon-compliant missing scene, based on the line, “It looked as though they’d both been wrestling in some long-forgotten Ninth catacomb.”

for to make frittours - T, 3k - pre-canon. It's Cam's birthday, and Palamedes is cooking.

six forms of love (g. macrophylla) - E, 13k - pre-canon/worldbuilding. Five times Camilla got interrupted in the bath (and one time she did the interrupting).

a rush of musk and saffron - G, 4k - pre-canon, prequel to for to make frittours. Camilla tries cardamom ice-cream for the first time.

you, in the lawless dark - G, 2.5k - pre-canon. It’s too hot and Camilla can’t sleep.

carduus benedictus - G, 3k - post-canon. Camilla gets a cold.

death, i think, is no parenthesis - M, 122k - fix-it/post-canon. Direct sequel to i carry it in.

nothing, invisible and nameless - T, 9k - post-canon. Camilla Hect is coming out of her cage, and she’s doing Just Fine.

far from a grown up i&you - G, 4k - pre-canon. Aged 8, Camilla kisses her future necromancer for the first time.

a fever i am learning to live with - M, 5k - pre-canon. A study in colour and Camilla.

we aren’t a match, we’re a kingdom - G, 5k - post-canon. Camilla and Palamedes find their softer world.

the gods will offer you chances - G, 14k - post-canon. After 23 years, and an actual wedding, Camilla and Palamedes finally go on a date.

thy deep and dreamless sleep - T, 12k - pre-canon. Palamedes makes a discovery and reinvents a popular pre-Res holiday.

This Is Not An Homage To Pop-Punk (by Fall Out Boy)

This is what happens when you let a former scene kid loose on a modern AU. Listed here in chronological order for the series, not the order I wrote them; if you’re new to the series, start with My Name is David Ruffin.

We’ll Do More Than Just Get By Together - G, 3k - On the first day of school, Palamedes Sextus makes a new friend.

My Name is David Ruffin and These Are The Temptations - M, 16k - mixed-media, featuring two idiots who can't communicate, one season of contentious television, and a lot of emo music.

I’ve Got All This Ringing in My Ears and None on My Fingers - T, 20k -five times Palamedes doesn’t say ‘I love you’, and one time he does.

I’m Bad Behaviour, But I Do It In The Best Way - M, 8k - Camilla learns sword-fighting out of a book, except the sword-fighting is sex and the book is Reddit.

I’m Half Doomed (And You’re Semi-Sweet) - M, 2k - Cam wears a dress to Kiki’s wedding.

The Take Over (The Break’s Over) - M, 3k - Palamedes would just like a little treat, please and thank you.

And the Very Silly Way You Grin - G, 2.5k - Palamedes helps Camilla decorate the Christmas tree.

Forthcoming (2026) - mixed-media, round two (electric boogaloo)

Forthcoming (??) - the fic that will probably get me fandom-cancelled 😇

Other

No More Than Reason - M, 26k - Shakespearean-inspired role-reversal AU, featuring a Dramatis Personae and a lot of melodrama. Comes with a happy ending, as Willy Shax himself would have wanted.

And to all a good night - Camillipede/Wormden, G, 1k - insect AU crackfic for those who know, with my love.

Withal so faire and sensitive - G, 16k - renfaire AU featuring Nona and the three people she loves most. Written for the TLT Holiday Fic Exchange 2022.

The Misaligned Centre of You - E, 2k - pwp in honour of spring’s return, dedicated to all the people who aren’t afraid of smut or romance.

Rev. 22:20 - E, 2k - 2023 kink meme fill. Read the warnings, don’t @ me.

A million names you call yourself, but I’ll call you fate - E, 4k - 2025′s edition of turning Camilla Hect’s brain off via orgasms.

On a clear day, you can see forever - T, 21k - the optometrist AU you never knew you wanted.

Take two cetirizine and call me in the morning - T, 20k - the flower shop AU that the group chat bullied me into.

Same Time Next Year - 2, 2k - Merry Yulemas to everyone who wants that goat to burn.

Forthcoming (anybody’s guess) - 🔪💀🤐

--

NOT THE LOCKED TOMB

that i may be thine - T, 3k - Grey/Kier (The Second Death of Locke), POV swap. Kier thinks about confessing, for the one williamth time.

[katakaluptastrophy]

John Gaius' commitment to a certain aesthetic for his space empire is...certainly something...

They are using fountain pens on spaceships. Fountain pens. To the extent that every vaguely intellectual character (other than Abigail Pent, who is repeatedly described as "neat" and "immaculate") is constantly described as having ink stains on their hands and even faces, and the smell of ink is referenced repeatedly.

And when they're not writing with fountain pens, they're using necromantically stabilised blood (this isn't just a Harrow quirk - the Sixth have special spikes on their clipboards for signing documents...).

Amongst the Lyctoral traces Abigail finds in the library at Cannan House are "a warped automatic pen with a thin inner cylinder of ink and a plex casing, rather more antiquated than one with an ink cartridge."

It also seems reasonable to assume that the "clockworks" they wear are analogue watches, as Nona scolds Cam for referring to her beeping digital watch as a "clockwork" on New Rho.

And besides the fountain pens, regency navy uniforms, swords, and general 20th century pulp literature culture, a few more things that characters specifically describe as antique or ancient include:

Sunglasses

Metal industrial shelving

Paper books with glossy pages

Black tie formal wear

Automatic doors

LED lights

Chrome kitchen fittings

Guns (to the extent that Abigail specifically says to the Sleeper "you come bearing ancient weapons")

And fine, these are all within the realms of things people are reasonably allowed to have a personal preference against...

But you know what else the Nine Houses don't have?

VACCINES.

What was the thought process by which Dr Science and Humanitarian Empathy decided to bring back routine childhood illnesses from the 1950s?

Speaking of the 1950s, why - in a society that appears to find permanently magically manipulating the bodies of living people trivial - does the standard of eyecare seem to also be from the early 20th century?

As a glasses wearer, I totally appreciate that there may simply be a social preference for glasses despite the existence of flesh magic. But Abigail Pent swapping between two pairs of glasses would seem to suggest that varifocals went the way of the mumps vaccine...

And our perspective on this is entirely from some of the most privileged people in the Dominicus system.

[scholar-hect]

As a licensed optician (non-practicing), I am compelled to observe that Abigail Pent may be one of the people who can’t tolerate multifocal lenses, or who is not yet at the stage of presbyopic emergence where they’d be more beneficial than two separate pairs, or who simply prefers (as I myself do) to maintain a pair for long distance and another for periods of near work (many reasons for this but I’ll spare you all the lesson in optical science, no one really cares about that).

I would like to know, however, why — in the world where flesh magic is a real possibility — is anyone bothering with glasses in the first place? Why are we not simply employing one of the optical-specialist flesh mages to reshape the cornea and eyeball to achieve 20/20 vision again? Being that most refractive error is simply the result of the light not reaching your retina correctly, due to the length or curvature of your eyeball.

I would also like to say: Palamedes, babe. You are at least -10.00 diopters of shortsighted. If you’re not going to employ a flesh mage for permanent refractive correction, please at least consider contact lenses. You will love not having to push them back into place constantly. You will love peripheral vision.

[katakaluptastrophy]

I love it when people who know about things write detailed replies!

As to why they're not using flesh magic to fix vision, I fear that glasses are probably a signifier of a particular kind of scholarly necromantic frailty.

(If this is recirculating, I should add even more curiously, the Houses *do* appear to have vaccines, as Gideon talks about getting them in Drearburh. So the Fourth's mumps would either seem to be turbo breakthrough space mumps, Fifth anti-Cohort plotting, or evidence that not every House shares the Ninth's...unique and inconsistent...approach to public health.

[scholar-hect]

I fear that glasses are probably a signifier of a particular kind of scholarly necromantic frailty

I’ve been thinking about this since the OG post crossed my dash last week (y’know, as one does) and I think I could get scientifically on board with there being something unique in an adept’s cellular structure that prevents a flesh mage from fully - or maybe even partially - correcting their sight. Much in the same way that orthokeratology can temporarily reshape the eye, but it wears off after a time. Tamsyn may not have intended me to think this deeply about in-universe optics but by god, I’m going to. 😂

(Unrelated to my addition but related to the original post and addendum: I would fully believe the Houses have developed the same inconsistent beliefs and approaches to vaccination as modern society. Like, 100% a planet that hurls their kids into frontline warfare at the age of 13 would be going “sure yeah, let’s have a mumps flu party, it’ll be great”.)

[scholar-hect]

WHOMST do you think just finished the never-ending antepenultimate scene?

[scholar-hect]

Whomst do you think went on a 75k word editing spree after finishing said antepenultimate scene? 🙃

[scholar-hect]

One day I will finish this fic. But not today.

[scholar-hect]

Whomst do you think just finished the penultimate scene?!?!

[scholar-hect]

Besties, you’re not gonna believe this…

[90s-kid-sad-adult]

lie to me

[slayerbuffy]

Buffy the Vampire Slayer 6.06 | "All the Way"

[katakaluptastrophy]

John Gaius' commitment to a certain aesthetic for his space empire is...certainly something...

They are using fountain pens on spaceships. Fountain pens. To the extent that every vaguely intellectual character (other than Abigail Pent, who is repeatedly described as "neat" and "immaculate") is constantly described as having ink stains on their hands and even faces, and the smell of ink is referenced repeatedly.

And when they're not writing with fountain pens, they're using necromantically stabilised blood (this isn't just a Harrow quirk - the Sixth have special spikes on their clipboards for signing documents...).

Amongst the Lyctoral traces Abigail finds in the library at Cannan House are "a warped automatic pen with a thin inner cylinder of ink and a plex casing, rather more antiquated than one with an ink cartridge."

It also seems reasonable to assume that the "clockworks" they wear are analogue watches, as Nona scolds Cam for referring to her beeping digital watch as a "clockwork" on New Rho.

And besides the fountain pens, regency navy uniforms, swords, and general 20th century pulp literature culture, a few more things that characters specifically describe as antique or ancient include:

Sunglasses

Metal industrial shelving

Paper books with glossy pages

Black tie formal wear

Automatic doors

LED lights

Chrome kitchen fittings

Guns (to the extent that Abigail specifically says to the Sleeper "you come bearing ancient weapons")

And fine, these are all within the realms of things people are reasonably allowed to have a personal preference against...

But you know what else the Nine Houses don't have?

VACCINES.

What was the thought process by which Dr Science and Humanitarian Empathy decided to bring back routine childhood illnesses from the 1950s?

Speaking of the 1950s, why - in a society that appears to find permanently magically manipulating the bodies of living people trivial - does the standard of eyecare seem to also be from the early 20th century?

As a glasses wearer, I totally appreciate that there may simply be a social preference for glasses despite the existence of flesh magic. But Abigail Pent swapping between two pairs of glasses would seem to suggest that varifocals went the way of the mumps vaccine...

And our perspective on this is entirely from some of the most privileged people in the Dominicus system.

[scholar-hect]

As a licensed optician (non-practicing), I am compelled to observe that Abigail Pent may be one of the people who can’t tolerate multifocal lenses, or who is not yet at the stage of presbyopic emergence where they’d be more beneficial than two separate pairs, or who simply prefers (as I myself do) to maintain a pair for long distance and another for periods of near work (many reasons for this but I’ll spare you all the lesson in optical science, no one really cares about that).

I would like to know, however, why — in the world where flesh magic is a real possibility — is anyone bothering with glasses in the first place? Why are we not simply employing one of the optical-specialist flesh mages to reshape the cornea and eyeball to achieve 20/20 vision again? Being that most refractive error is simply the result of the light not reaching your retina correctly, due to the length or curvature of your eyeball.

I would also like to say: Palamedes, babe. You are at least -10.00 diopters of shortsighted. If you’re not going to employ a flesh mage for permanent refractive correction, please at least consider contact lenses. You will love not having to push them back into place constantly. You will love peripheral vision.

[scholar-hect]

“Summarise this page in one click!” No. “Improve this ticket!” No. “Fix my grammar!” No, no, NO. Can every dev and CEO just fuck off with these ‘features’ in their apps and sites? Like, for real? I don’t need the machine to think for me!!! Leaving aside the fact that I have a literal doctoral degree in thinking, it’s GOOD for humans to exercise their powers of reasoning and deduction. Why are we so obsessed with making everyone stupid?!

[jerreeeeeee]

not every mutual fits neatly into an archetypal medievalism but there are some mutuals that im like yeah addressing you as “my liege” would come strangely naturally

[jerreeeeeee]

what mutual is prev

my liege lord

my loyal knight

my wise wizard

my evil advisor

my brother in arms

my lady muse

my wild mermaid friend

my fellow alchemist

my dashing rapscallion

my monstrous foe

Voting ended onJun 6

[scholar-hect]

WHOMST do you think just finished the never-ending antepenultimate scene?

[scholar-hect]

Whomst do you think went on a 75k word editing spree after finishing said antepenultimate scene? 🙃

[scholar-hect]

One day I will finish this fic. But not today.

[scholar-hect]

Whomst do you think just finished the penultimate scene?!?!

[ohsimplethinggs-deactivated2023]

I read somewhere that "When you choose a life partner you're choosing your eating companion for about 20,000 meals, your travel companion for about 70 vacations, your retirement friend, career therapist, & someone whose day you'll hear about 18,000 times" and I really can't stress this enough.

[happyheidi]

🦔

This is Charles. He wants to go on a journey around tumblr. could you show him around?

[inkatesbush]

they're saying spending 2 hours in the word doc changing words slightly to be more specific and evocative and moving endless commas around is one of the most noble and respected things that you can do

[curlymcclain]

the crazy thing about doctor who is that it really is the best show ever for 30 seconds at a time. you never know when those 30 seconds will be. sometimes they happen multiple times in a single episode and sometimes you wait years and years and years. and the best part is those 30 seconds are surrounded by the worst show ever, which is also doctor who

[scholar-hect]

22% through The Devil Makes Three and I already love it more than my last four reads put together.

[scholar-hect]

Absolutely nothing so relatable as Tess Matheson attempting to make crepes in a microwave.

[scholar-hect]

a) Losing my mind at the final line; b) you really should all should read this one, ideally immediately so that I can scream at someone directly about the feelings and thoughts I'm currently experiencing.

[scholar-hect]

Forced to leave my cosy house in this bastard rain… I am owed reparations, surely.

[scholar-hect]

22% through The Devil Makes Three and I already love it more than my last four reads put together.

[scholar-hect]

Absolutely nothing so relatable as Tess Matheson attempting to make crepes in a microwave.

[scholar-hect]

WHOMST do you think just finished the never-ending antepenultimate scene?

[scholar-hect]

Whomst do you think went on a 75k word editing spree after finishing said antepenultimate scene? 🙃

[scholar-hect]

One day I will finish this fic. But not today.