Jack’s Goat (Read: Sheep) Story
In case some of you haven’t seen Jack’s older GTAV videos, or have forgotten, I’d like to share this gem with you. ( @septicblogsam- In case you haven’t heard this story before ^-^) The best story @therealjacksepticeye has ever told. It doesn’t have a title, so I decided to give it one. (see source video here)
“Jeremiah and his Goat/Sheep Farm”
A long time ago, in a land far far away there was this guy called Jeremiah. He was a goat farmer and he had a bunch of goats, a few sheep too but he didn’t dabble that much into them. He also had a few cows, but nobody likes cows.
And Jeremiah was a good guy, he was a good friend of mine. Never understood a single word he said, but I helped him drink his wine.
But Jeremiah had a wife called Suzie and the two of them lived nicely in this little shack up on top of a hill.
But one day this big badass wolf named Bartholomew James Frigadoara, he came along and he tried to eat one of the sheep. So Jeremiah had a really tough decision on his mind, did he sacrifice his wife Suzie to Bartholomew Frigadora, or did he just give up one of the sheep.
Now the thing about Jeremiah, something you’ve got to know, is he loved his sheep more than his wife. His wife is a bit of a bitch, she stole all of his stuff and she kept spending all of his money. And I think she was having an affair with his friend called Steve.
And he said “Hey wolf, y’know I really don’t know what to do here you gotta cut me some slack.”
So the wolf said, “No! Five o'clock today you got to chose, Suzie, a sheep, or maybe Steve. I’ll accept Steve, but he’s not as tasty.”
So, long story short he killed the wolf, he killed Steve, he killed the wife, and then he ended up marrying all his sheep.
So now he lives in a shack out in Zimbabwe and he just lives in this big giant house full of sheep. And there’s kinda shit everywhere but he does his best to clean it up. He doesn’t have any kids yet, though, because that biologically impossible, for any of you who haven’t taken biology lessons, or who don’t have common sense.
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