You'll never be alone. @shepardcmdr - Tumblr Blog

Once she was close enough for him to reach her, Garrus placed his hands on her hips and gently smoothed his palms over them as she spoke, his hands slipping under her tank top just enough to feel her bare skin against his. It would have been so easy to slide his hands up further, to her ribs and maybe even her breasts, but he was alright with just keeping things calm and casual tonight. He was so relieved to even be here with her right now that he wasn’t even thinking about how nights like this usually ended, at least, it wasn’t the only thing on his mind. Of course he had images of her naked body glistening with sweat as he crawled on top of her and filled her in that perfect way that he did, but he quickly snapped back to reality easily and without a distraction.

She moved in to kiss him again and he allowed his hands to migrate to her lower back, pressing against her just a bit to make the kiss last a few seconds longer, but not in a very forceful way. This was only one of the handful of kisses they’d shared tonight after not even being in the same room together for days, so he wanted to savor it, even if it was only for a few seconds. Soon she was pulling away and leading him towards the bed, holding his hand in hers as she walked, and he eagerly went along with her. Once they got into bed, he knew he’d be able to kiss her again and again until both of them were too tired to do it anymore, so that made him go along with her without the least bit of hesitation.

Another smile appeared on his face as she released his hand and climbed into bed, making her way to the side that she usually slept on and inviting him to join her. Again, he didn’t hesitate to follow, and much like she did, he got down onto his knees at the end of the bed and crawled up to her, sliding down beneath the covers and lying on his side to face her. “I’m glad you let me stay tonight,” he whispered as he reached out to gently stroke her cheek with his thumb. For the first time in days, he might actually be able to get some sleep, rather than tossing and turning all night thinking about her and how he preferred sleeping with her over sleeping alone any day.

shepardcmdr

When he got into bed and lay next to her, she immediately curled her body against his, taking hold of his free hand between them. Her other hand weaseled its way between the pillow and his face and she began to stroke the familiar facial plating that covered his cheek. She smiled at the sight of him next to her, in her bed. It had been far too long since she'd seen that, and if she had her way, she'd never sleep another night without him. Of course, she knew that wouldn't always be possible, but it was what she wanted nonetheless.

"I'm glad, too," she reassured him. The lights were already dimmed, so there was no reason for them to need to move from where they were, which was a relief. The last thing she would want would be to have to get up now and leave him, leave the comfort that had been restored between the two of them. She didn't want to imagine him sleeping all alone down in the Main Battery, or trying to ignore the snoring of the engineers in the crew quarters. She felt bad that he'd had to deal with that, but it wouldn't be an issue anymore. Kaylin tilted her face so that her lips met his mouth in a soft kiss. She'd missed that- snuggling and kissing him as they were trying to fall asleep. So many nights it wasn't anything other than his kiss which could calm and comfort her until she fell asleep, and she'd definitely noticed the absence of that.

Reluctantly, she withdrew from the kiss and rested her forehead on his. "I love you," she said quietly as she laced her five fingers with his three. It had been far too long since she'd told him that, though she was sure he hadn't forgotten. It seemed strange that it had been so long; the first night they had slept apart, she'd actually rolled over at one point and been concerned when he wasn't there before she realized that he was supposed to be down in the med bay with Chakwas. If there was one thing that being apart from him had reinforced to her, it was that she never wanted to be apart from him again.

#garrusvakarianhere #amnesia follow up

tavianalvia

Tavi had his work fucking cut out for him.

He tried not to wince at the short poem suddenly being spouted at him. No way this would work if he let on too fast how… really truly terrible the batarian was at it. Or if he let himself tell the man off for calling him short. Forcing himself to smile casually, he found a place to stand, feigning interest.

“Good job man. Don’t see how you got people leavin’ ya, poetry skills like that.” Maybe he was laying it on a little thick. Whatever. Long as he got his terrible poem. Mentally, he ran through Shepard’s list of requirements. Hips would be easy enough… mandibles maybe. That last one though was going to be tough as hell but hey, for five thousand credits he could sure as hell make the attempt.

He cocked his hips a bit, fluttered his mandibles in a way that he hoped would draw attention to them without him having to bring it up himself. ”But, uh, go on man. Serenade me then. Wanna hear more.”

shepardcmdr

The batarian seemed shocked; all four eyes blinking in surprise as he looked the turian over. He seemed almost skeptical, as if trying to decide whether the turian was actually interested, or just being nice. He was completely wrong on both counts, but Shepard sure as hell wasn't going to be the one to tell him that. The batarian seemed to straighten as he was filled with newly found pride in his own work.

Whatever he said next, Shepard couldn't hear it. She'd had to bring her hand to her face as the man went on, talking about mandibles and plating. She was pretty sure that at some point the poet had said something that she now owed Tavi money for, but it was well worth it. Very few things in the galaxy could provide her as much entertainment as this. She wondered how Tavi was managing to keep a straight face as she herself was struggling to keep herself from bursting out with laughter.

When she finally gathered herself enough to listen in on the conversation again, she was lucky enough to hear the last line of the batarian's latest masterpiece.

"And eyes the color of a varren's butthole."

#poetry with tavi #tavianalvia #[I'M SO SORRY]

xenoscience-studies

“Yes. Female clans kept in isolation; ‘worthy’ males recruited regularly for breeding purposes. Rarely see female krogan offworld. Considered valuable resource.” Mordin frowned. “Would imagine it further encourages militant lifestyle. Lack of organized family structure — of any sort, replaced by clan ‘army’ mentality. Find idea unpleasant, personally.”

He turned his head to eye the receding planet out the window of the lab. “Tuchanka itself not hospitable but not, technically, fault of currently living krogan. Became post-nuclear wasteland millenia even before salarian uplifting; even now still only in early stages of ecological recovery. Most wildlife adapted to and evolving for wasteland survival. Hard to say what krogan could do for it at this point.”

He paused, then smiled faintly, looking back towards Shepard leaning against the bench next to him. “Have heard from Captain Kirrahe’s team regarding your standoff with Wrex two years ago; quite well-known in STG circles. Would venture to guess you are right about influence. Taught him he can’t get all he wants by yelling. Lesson many could stand to learn — both krogan and not.”

shepardcmdr

Kaylin nodded in agreement. Thankfully it seemed to be a quality that Okeer had instilled in their resident krogan- even before he'd passed the rite, grunt had always seemed far more reasonable than most krogan that she'd met. Her mind went back to what Mordin had said about the women on Tuchanka, and if brought her back to a question she'd had. "So the women are used solely for child bearing and raising the children?" Shepard shook her head. "I can't imagine that. That would suck."

She'd never really been in possession of what one might consider a "maternal instinct," nor had she ever been interested in discovering how to obtain one. Obviously childbearing was important, but so were the military efforts that she was overseeing. Though Kaylin had no objections to the act which led to childbearing, in fact with the right partner she quite enjoyed it, she also couldn't imagine what her life would be like if she'd chosen to raise a family.

"Are their women allowed to do other things? Join the military? Lead clans? I guess with the genophage they all have to be devoted to popping out all the little ones that they can." It was a bit grim to think about, and more than slightly unsettling. "What does a Krogan baby look like, anyway? How big are they? Gods, they've got to be the size of baby whales..." She was probably getting off track, but it was a genuine question. She assumed Mordin had seen his fair share of krogan births while doing his follow up work on Tuchanka.

#xenoscciencestudies

codenamearchangel

Garrus | Shepard Housewarming

codenamearchangel

shepardcmdr

#garrusvakarianhere #housewarming

codenamearchangel

Normally, Garrus removed his armor with haste, desperate to feel her bare skin against his, but tonight was different than other nights. They were both moving at a normal speed, him working on the hoop that covered his collar and his breastplate, and Kaylin loosening the plating on his sides, the two of them working in tandem to get the pieces ready for removal. Once she got the side plates loose, she walked off towards the bathroom to get herself ready and he continued to take off the rest of his armor, dropping the plates down at his feet before he moved on to the pieces that covered his hips and thighs.

He could hear the water running in the bathroom and could only assume she was doing her usual bed time routine, which entailed brushing her teeth and either getting completely undressed or down to almost nothing, both of which would have been fine with him. Of course he always wanted her, wanted to feel her skin against his and the warmth of her body as he lay on top of her, buried deep inside of her, but he didn’t need that tonight. If it happened, it happened, but it wasn’t the first or only thing on his mind. He was just glad to be staying here after spending several nights alone, so sex certainly wasn’t a priority, comfort and closeness was.

His eyes flicked up to her as she stepped out of the bathroom, a quick smile forming by his mandibles, his hands finding the last few releases on his boots so he could slip out of them. The only other thing he needed to do was remove his envirosuit, but that took all of five seconds to do. Smile still apparent, Garrus stood upright and unzipped his suit, stepping out of it and letting it join the pile of armor on the floor. “I don’t know about you, but I’m tired,” he said with a soft sigh.

shepardcmdr

Kaylin pushed off the door frame and approached him as he unzipped his envirosuit, running her hands over his chest. She was still wearing her tank top and panties, but she much preferred Garrus like this: completely naked so that she could see all of him and have access to every inch of his body to be able to touch him and feel him as she pleased. It wasn't even a sexual thing; she just love the feeling of his flesh and plating under her fingers, and it had been longer than she would have liked since she'd felt that herself.

"I'm exhausted," she agreed, bringing her hands to his neck and brushing her thumbs over his mandibles. "I haven't been sleeping well without you here." It was a strange thing to admit, but without his body next to hers, without feeling his presence around her, she'd found it difficult to fall asleep. He was such a comfort to her in so many ways, sometimes even when he wasn't around, but the past few days had been hell. It was one thing if she knew that he was working later and he'd be up eventually, but it was something else entirely when she knew that he wouldn't be up at all, and that it was her fault. Trying to fall asleep every night with that on her conscience was the cause of not only restlessness, but also infuriation at herself.

She pushed herself to her toes once more to kiss him, then dropped her hands and took hold of one of his, leading him towards the bed. So many nights this very same walk had led to racing hearts, tangled sheets, and moans of pleasure, but tonight the only thing she could think about was wrapping herself up in his arms and kissing him until they fell asleep. When she got to the bed, she dropped to her knees on the mattress and crawled to her usual spot, turning back to face him, then pulled the covers over her legs and patted the mattress next to her.

#garrusvakarianhere #amnesia follow up

codenamearchangel

He accepted another kiss before even attempting to respond to her simply because he needed it, needed to feel her lips on his mouth, needed to feel her body against his and her hands on his face and neck. Days without her touch had left him hungry for it, and not even in a sexual way, but just in general. He was so used to feeling her hands on his face at night or her fingertips grazing over his arm in the morning as he had it wrapped around her middle, asking her to wait five more minutes before getting out of bed to start the day, that he’d been missing it these last few days. Thankfully, she wanted him to stay tonight, which meant he’d be able to touch her and be touched by her all night.

“Just a second,” he said, taking a step away from her. He raised his omni-tool and pressed a quick pattern of buttons, mandibles twitching into a little smile as he completed his task. “There.” She probably had no idea what he did. Recently, he’d adjusted the settings for the ‘autopilot’ mode for his calibrations, making it able to run for much longer periods without needing to be touched by his hands or anyone else’s. Basically, it was doing his job for him with markedly less accuracy, but it was able to keep things running for at least eight hours without intervention. “Just set it to an automatic mode. Calibrations won’t need me until the morning.” His smile grew as he closed his omni-tool, satisfied that he was now ready to stay here with her without any distractions.

Garrus started fiddling with the many clasps, buckles, seals, and releases that kept his armor on, beginning at the plating that covered his arms, removing those with ease and slipping off his gloves, discarding all the pieces in a small pile on the floor near his feet. “Let me just, uh, get all of this off. I know it’s hard enough to be close to me without this stuff on, but it’s even harder with it on,” he chuckled. His angular features were probably less than comfortable when pressed to her softer more pliable body, but thankfully, it molded to him perfectly, like they were meant for each other. That alone made him feel better about cuddling up with her at night. “Sometimes…sometimes I regret wearing this stuff,” he said as he moved on to the shoulder pieces. Help from her would be welcome, but not required, which is why he didn’t even bother asking.

shepardcmdr

She was glad that he'd set it to automatic, as she didn't want him to have to go anywhere. Being apart from him for a few days was long enough that she thought that if she had to survive it for even a few more minutes, it would be the death of her. As he began removing his armor, she took a step closer and began to loosen the pieces around his hips, and on the sides of his torso. Normally when she was helping him like this, it was because they'd been teasing each other for a while, sometimes hours, and she couldn't stand the thought of him not being buried inside of her for even a minute longer. This time, however, her only motive was to feel his body pressed against hers and hold him tight; to feel his thick plating against her skin and wrap her arms around him without his pesky armor getting in the way.

She still had a bit of trouble removing his armor, but by then she'd had plenty of practice from all the times that she'd removed it in the past. At least it wasn't like the first time when she'd fumbled for so long that she just gave up and became incredibly frustrated with her failure, much to Garrus' amusement. She was still thankful that he'd worn his civvies up the first time he'd come to her cabin, because she couldn't imagine having to go through all that and still have the looming awkwardness of their first time being together.

Once she'd finished loosening his armor in a few places, she left him to finish removing it all and walked into the bathroom to brush her teeth. As she did, she set about removing her own clothes; she unzipped her sweater and let it fall off her arms, unbuttoned her pants and shimmied out of them, then reached behind her back to unclasp her bra. She pulled it down over her arms and out from under her shirt, then discarded it in the pile with her sweater and pants. She normally slept either naked or in very little clothing, so it wouldn't be surprising to him to see her come out of the bathroom wearing almost nothing. She rinsed her mouth and her toothbrush then splashed some water on her face before walking around the counter and leaning on the door frame. She watched with a smile as he finished removing the last of his armor.

#garrusvakarianhere #amnesia follow up

codenamearchangel

Garrus | Shepard Housewarming

codenamearchangel

shepardcmdr

#garrusvakarianhere #housewarming

codenamearchangel

He knew exactly what she meant when she said that it felt haunted, and it wasn’t stupid at all. The past few days he’d alternated between the crew quarters and the main battery when it came to sleeping at night, and in either one, he found himself lonely and cold. There were the other crew members in the bunks with him, but they were so surprised to see him in there that they looked at him like he had three heads or something, though he was obviously just fine. He’d spent so many evenings with her ever since she had invited him into her bed the first time that he never slept in the crew quarters anymore, even if they had had some sort of argument. It was usually resolved by the evening, and if it wasn’t, he’d just stay up all night calibrating and coordinating troops on Palaven and Menae. Tonight, she’d finally invited him back in, and he was more than willing to stay.

“Of course I’ll stay,” he nodded, sighing softly. Having her ask him to stay and to say that she had missed him was a big relief, which meant he could admit to missing her without feeling like that was the wrong thing to say. “I’ve missed you too. It’s cold in the crew quarters and everyone snores.” He wasn’t trying to be funny, just honest, though it did probably sound like he was cracking a joke. Now feeling like it was probably okay to be more affectionate with her, he moved his hands down from her face to her waist, wrapping his arms around her middle and pulling her in close. It was unfortunate that he’d chosen to wear armor for this visit, but it was his usual attire if he didn’t think he’d be spending time with her any time soon. He felt safer in armor, she knew, that’s why she never asked him to go without it.

Garrus nuzzled the top of her head with his cheek and sighed into her hair, thankful that everything between them was going to go back to normal after they’d both been so distant for days. After a moment of holding her there like that, he took a half-step back and raised one hand to her face again, this time to press underneath her cheek to turn her head up to face him, allowing him to lean in and press his mouth to hers in a gentle kiss. The feeling of her lips against his mouth was something that he’d felt so many times, but going days without it made it feel almost unfamiliar, though certainly not unwelcome. He usually kissed her every single day, multiple times too, so not kissing her for half a week was starting to drive him crazy. “Should I change into something more comfortable?” His mandibles moved away from his jaw to form a soft smile as their eyes met.

shepardcmdr

Her arms repositioned themselves around his neck as he pulled her in close and she just breathed, allowing herself to enjoy the feeling of his arms around her and his face buried in her hair. She could feel the warmth of his breath washing over her and the familiar sensation further calmed her as they remained that way, holding each other for a few seconds. She hadn't realized that she needed that small reassurance of their relationship or his closeness, but once she had it she was certainly glad for it. When his hand left her waist, cradled her face and his mouth found hers, she wasn't sure that she'd ever been so relieved to be kissed. It had only been days, but from the way he kissed her, and the way she accepted the kiss, it seemed closer to years.

"I would say that's probably a good idea. I was just about to change for bed, and I haven't yet figured out how to cuddle with you when you're wearing your armor," she said, joking. It was one of those nights where all she wanted was just to know he existed, and that he was there with her. Anything beyond that would be welcome, but all she wanted was his presence. "Do you have things to wrap up in the main battery, or are you finished for the night?"

Secretly, though probably not so secretly since Garrus knew her so well, she hoped that he was done and that he wouldn't have to leave now to go back and finish things down there. She'd been about to take a shower and head to bed when he messaged her, but the shower could wait for the morning. Kaylin moved her hand to his face and brushed her thumb over his cheek and mandible again with a soft smile. It had been so long since she'd been able to do that- just run her fingers over his face. It was usually something she would do late at night when they were curled up in bed together, sometimes still wrapped up in each other after lovemaking, or early in the morning on the rare occasion that she would wake up before him. Either way, it had been days, and the feeling of his face against her fingertips was comforting. She pushed herself up on her toes to meet his mouth in another soft kiss.

#garrusvakarianhere #amnesia follow up

codenamearchangel

“You’re not going to lose me,” he whispered as he brought his other hand up to the opposite side of her face, now cupping it in both hands to keep her from looking away from him if she attempted to again. With a soft sigh, he added, “And you don’t need to apologize either.” His mandibles formed a slight smile, one that was actually legitimate this time, and he smoothed his thumbs over her cheekbones slowly as he thought about what else he wanted to say. “I know you were scared. Hell, I would have been scared too. If you had woken up one day and claimed that you didn’t know who I was, I’d be terrified. I’d probably rush you to Chakwas to see what had happened to you because I know you wouldn’t just ‘forget’ me like that. You did the right thing.”

This conversation was going better than he had anticipated. Already they were getting close to a normal chat, though they both were sort of picking their words, at least, he kind of was. It wasn’t that he was afraid to say what he was thinking so much that he didn’t know what he was thinking which meant that he wasn’t entirely sure what to say. He couldn’t guarantee that he’d never have an episode like this again, mostly because he wasn’t entirely sure what his limits were, as far as working, losing sleep, and not eating. How long had he gone without sleep before this happened? Without eating? How many hours had he worked in a row to trigger this? The doctor hadn’t given him any clear answers, just instructions on how to prevent further episodes, saying that was all he needed to worry about.

“I won’t let it happen again,” he reassured her once more. “The only thing that would ever take me away from you is death, and I’m not letting that claim me any time soon.” It was true; he couldn’t think of any reason why he’d ever want to leave her, no situation that would cause him to even consider it, leaving death as the only separator. If he had it his way, they’d die together, old, wrapped in each other’s arms in a nice house on a beach away from everyone else. They’d most likely die in combat at the rate that they were going, but it was a pleasant thought, at the very least. “Please, don’t worry about me. It’s over, I’m fine, and we’re fine. Right?”

shepardcmdr

She relaxed a bit more every second, and when he brought up his second hand to cradle her face, she closed her eyes and sighed. So this was it, then. This was the conversation that she had been so dreading, and it had turned out to be nothing more than apologies and reassurances from both sides. She was ashamed at how she'd acted, ashamed of herself for not speaking to him sooner. But now, with his face on her hands, she realized how much she had truly missed him. It had been days since they'd had a conversation like this, expressed their feelings, and it had been just as long since she'd been able to hold him. She cursed his armor once more, wishing that she could wrap herself in his arms and feel his body against hers.

Finally, she opened her eyes again to find his. "Yeah. We're fine," she said softly. She could see that he, too, had relaxed. His mandibles had moved to make it look like he was smiling back at her as she looked up at him. She missed seeing him every night and waking up next to him every morning, missed the way he would nuzzle against her and the way his warm breath washed over her skin as he buried his face in her neck as he slept. Every night she'd tossed and turned thinking about him down in the crew quarters, or uncomfortable on his cot in the main battery. Either way, he'd be alone, and that was something that she never wanted him to be; something she'd promised him he'd never be.

"I've missed you," she admitted. "It's not the same here without you, it's so lonely. Haunted, almost. That sounds stupid." Jellyfish made terrible company. She thanked whatever deity was up there that she hadn't said that out loud. "You're welcome to stay up here again, if you want. I didn't mean to make you feel like you couldn't, you're always welcome here." All that was true, but it wasn't entirely what she should have said. Telling him that he was welcome to stay with her was only part of it. The full truth was that she'd been craving his company for days and saying that he was welcome to stay was just a roundabout way of asking him to stay with her. She didn't want him to think she was just being nice, though, so she followed up by being a bit more direct. "I want you to stay."

#garrusvakarianhere #amnesia follow up

#xenoscience-studies #[you're not awful i think you're swell]#ooc

xenoscience-studies

“Tired. Have not lost touch for combat but must admit to having slacked off on exercise while running Omega clinic. Feel mission keenly for some hours afterwards,” Mordin said, knowing full well that wasn’t really what she was asking. “Glad to have closure,” he added quietly after a moment’s pause. “Have little room to complain if it was not the closure I expected.”

He rounded the workbench as she approached, leaning his long, lank body against it with a shake of his head. “Educational experience, at any rate, even setting aside Maelon’s behavior. Your first visit to Tuchanka, I think, yes?” Folding his arms, he tilted his head back thoughtfully. “Have been many times, doing followup work on genophage. Have never before seen krogan organization on the level of Wrex’s progress thus far.”

shepardcmdr

"Wrex is something else," she agreed as she leaned against the same bench. Kaylin crossed her arms over her chest and shrugged her shoulders. "You should have seen him when I met him. I'm not bragging, it certainly wasn't my doing, but I think his time aboard the Normandy did him a whole lot of good in that aspect." She was referring to multiple conversations she'd overheard between Wrex and Ash, as well as the events on Virmire. "He listens to reason- it's a trait I haven't seen in many Krogan."

Her arms unfolded; one hand settled on her hip and the other braced herself against the workbench. "It was my first time on Tuchanka, yes. I was... a little underwhelmed, honestly. For a race that seems so proud, they don't seem to take care of their home world." Her fingers drummed along the surface of the table. "I knew they were strictly militant I guess I just didn't realize to what degree. I didn't see any women, though... they live separately?"

#xenosciencestudies

codenamearchangel

Garrus | Shepard Housewarming

codenamearchangel

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