Shire Sackposting @shiresackposting - Tumblr Blog

pansyfemme

close your eyes and imagine freshly roasted root vegetables perfectly seasoned and crispy as far as the eye can see

nighttimepatrons

Sam trying to get Frodo to take one more step

nighttimepatrons

Sam psychologically tormenting Gollum

hs-tolkien

thorinsbeard

Thorin

jururenu

valdin-s

just finished reading two towers for the first time and goddamn

y'all weren't kidding about the homoerotic subtext between Sam and frodo

like atp it's not even subtext theyre practically fucking on the page

squigglyworms

love the end of the two towers where gandalf looks into the sunset talking bout "yea frodo had to go it alone it was his destiny and there is no changing it he will be ok 😌✨" and aragorn is like "sam went with him btw" and gandalf is like "oh fuck thank god"

depsidase

inesacreative

I would rather share one lifetime with you than face all the ages of this world alone.

the-zenith-calls

My favorite scenes in the LotR books are the ones where Legolas has vital information and just decides it's not important to share.

Like when Gandalf spent literal PAGES trying to figure out why the vibes were off in Moria and Legolas chimes in with just "it's a balrog :) that shit's evil :) we're so fucked :)" like what do you MEAN you knew already and just didn't tell him??

Or at the beginning of Two Towers when Aragorn thinks there's something nearby so he puts his ear to the ground to listen, and then like 10 minutes later is like "hmmm i hear horses" and Legolas is just like "mm yep. there are 105 blond bitches with spears" like you just let your friend put his face in the dirt and you can SEE them??

Legolas please gain a sense of urgency

knives-in-the-dishwater

It's because legolas hasn't spent enough time with non-elves to remember that they don't know what he knows.

gandalf is scratching his head in moria, and legolas is thinking "oh man, the wizard noticed something off *besides* the obvious balrog that we all are aware of??"

"I wonder what aragorn is listening for? must be hard to hear, what with all of the horses. How many horses are there, actually? 1... 2... 3..."

taavicleric

"What do your elvish eyes see?" is Aragorn saying, as politely as possible, "Because the REST OF US are at a significant disadvantage, Prince Dipshit."

lovely-v

I’m gonna propose “I guess you haven’t read the silmarillion then :/” as a default response to anyone not understanding a reference to something obscure. even if it’s not remotely Tolkien related. I want to build up a perception that perhaps the sum total of human knowledge is contained in the silmarillion

lovely-v

10-4ward

This is the polar opposite of this:

froginakettle

myonlypen

masterrainbowcat

XKCD and Tumblr once again providing weapons I cannot use

beelsebub

KING THRANDUIL + ART (PART ONE)

The Fallen Angel (L'Ange déchu) by Alexandre Cabanel Head of Mars by French School Doña Juana la Loca by Francisco Pradilla Venus, Cupid, Folly and Time by Agnolo Bronzino Disdain by William-Adolphe Bouguereau Le Désespéré by Gustave Courbet Saint John the Evangelist by Peter Paul Rubens The Denial of Saint Peter by Caravaggio Emperor Francis I of Austria by Friedrich von Amerling Head of Christ by Rembrandt

wizardpostsdotorg

the only bad thing you can say abt the lotr movies is that they dont have tom bombadil. [boredly reading ad copy] but now thanks to DisNetflHboPrime+Extra and the guys that brought you stranger things, Bombadil™️ will be an 8 episode, 16hr limited miniseries premiering only on Poob. the hilarious action fantasy adventure prequel to the lord of the rings follows zendaya as galadriel, Bill skarsgard as gandalf, dave bautista as Orc Dave, and of course, chris evans as bouncing Tom Bombadil himself. score by reznor & ross with special appearances by natasha lyone, taylor swift, and ed sheeran (from the game of thrones cinematic universe) and 2 million dollar budget per episode critics are raving "its fine" and "theres some good stuff in there i guess" poob subscriptions start at 39.99/wk