you’re not losing interest. you’re getting close and that scares you.
why you switch drs right when you’re about to shift…
if you’re someone who has multiple drs and finds yourself constantly flipping and floating between them, never staying focused on one for an extended period of time, and call yourself “lazy” “bored” or “inconsistent” because of it, listen tf up!
i’ve found that many shifters have a specific kind of resistance to messing up. they’ll experience great progress, building their confidence more and more until they have a “breakthrough” of sorts—maybe a shift, maybe a close attempt but then, just as suddenly, poof! they’re onto a new reality! a new fixation. if that sounds like something you do, my theory is that close attempts scare you because you start holding onto the outcome more after you’ve noticed something you’ve done has worked.
and going beyond that, you’re afraid the progress you’ve made still won’t be enough to “shift you fully”.
sometimes, underneath that need to switch drs exists a persistent fear of never fully getting to a single one. it’s a fear that you may push away or not address because you enjoy the variety of options but it’s equally one that just gets bigger with time because instead of sitting in that discomfort when it comes up, your mind redirects you sneakily.
switching to a new dr is basically an escape from facing that uncomfortable vulnerability because if you keep switching before you ever “make it” you never have to face the possibility of “never” making it at all. you can easily say “well, i’ve only been focused on this dr for a couple days so it’s fine that i haven’t shifted,” and never address the reason behind the switch.
but the reason behind the switch is important. when you get close to shifting, ask yourself if you apply a subtle pressure to the next attempt you have planned? do you secretly believe that your progress has to be linear otherwise you’re right back at square one? is it possible that you switch drs so that you never have to face having the close call not turn into a successful shift shortly after? is it possible that new dr = new square?
these are all questions you should ask yourself to know if you truly resonate with this post because the next part of this is going to give you tips on what i believe you should do when this trigger to switch realities comes up. and no, i’m not telling you to just “persist” and ignore the urge without any further explanation.
first, don’t analyze the attempt to death. right after a close attempt, don’t allow your brain to indulge in all you did wrong or all you did right. all you’re doing in that moment is creating pressure around results.
shifting isn’t a chore so it shouldn’t be examined like one. acknowledge that you did a damn good job and feel the joy from that.
next, you’re going to normalize it immediately. you having a close attempt isn’t rare, it isn’t huge, it isn’t monumental. this ties into law of assumption work. if you’re someone who believes you are worthy of shifting, that your dr is not above you, and that you’re the master shifter you desire yourself to be, act like it’s something that can happen again, because it is. remember, that the more you pedestal that reality, the more you’ll have to “work” to reach it. if you act like getting close to fully shifting there is something that’s out of the ordinary for you, you’ll only make the reality seem large and daunting and serious in comparison. hence, the urge to switch realities for a “fresh start”.
third—and this is directly in tow to the second tip—release the pressure off that dr. your urge to switch drs is coming from the fact that it matters too much to you now whether you “succeed” or “fail”. so in order to remedy that, reassure yourself that you don’t have to get there the very next time. it’ll happen when it happens! i want you to keep that playful and curious energy within your attempts. you don’t need to “lock in” more directly after some success. reconnect with the dr in a casual way. intensity will breed more pressure when you’re the kind of person who avoids serious things. your dr isn’t serious. it’s just home.
and if you still find yourself wanting to switch drs after all that, sit with the urge you feel and question why. make sure it’s not stemming from a place of avoidance, pressure or fear of failure. if you feel scared that you won’t be able to replicate that most recent attempt, free yourself from the need to do just that. purposely disregard attempting and pour your focus into connecting to the dr in a non-method coded way. listen to music, watch media related to it, go on pinterest, write stories!
stick with the reality, but don’t go out of your way to attempt to shift unless you’re positive you’re capable of keeping it light and curious.
and instead of trying to trap yourself to this one reality because you haven’t shifted there yet, allow yourself to commit to it because you simply want to see it through and still hold excitement for the place. remember that you never have to stick to any dr. when you feel like you have to, your brain is more inclined to rebel and quit.
all of these tips should help you to make that reality and shifting feel safe, which is all i really am trying to promote here. shifting is not high stakes. it’s not life or death. don’t resist the shift by putting unnecessary pressure onto it. your dr is home. home should not feel heavy.
