petra nikonova is an americanized version of her name that she had to assume because of her aunt who is now her guardian. her aunt is her father’s sister but unlike her dad, her aunt took off from russia at literally the earliest convenience, marrying the first person who could take her far away from russia and all of its corrupted politics and general state of ‘shoddiness’ as she calls it. her aunt is also a black widow having killed three of her four husbands in the last decade. her aunt has been married a total of seven times. the first died naturally, the second and third were divorces.
her aunt has control of petra’s rather impressive inheritance which is a combination of her father’s business profits, her mother’s (minor) inheritances from the titled side of the family, all of the proceeds of petra’s performances and compositions – she still composes and publishes (she writes mainly pianist pieces though has written a couple of orchestra pieces and is working on an opera off and on though it’s mostly in her head). her manager still retains a large percentage of her profits though her aunt is trying to fight that ‘on petra’s behalf’. petra never performs in front of anyone. ever. ever ever. she literally has such stage fright and true terror of performing in front of anyone ever again that she physically freezes and her head spins and she can’t breathe and the walls close in and all of that manner of reaction. she also still has night terrors regarding performances, regarding her parent’s death, regarding her various suicide attempts.
she has attempted suicide three times. the first was a year after her parent’s death, approximately at around age fourteen when she took a bucco of sleeping pills with a fifth of vodka and slit her forearms from pretty close to wrist to elbow. she tried again in the asylum in russia by hanging herself. a year and a half or so later after being trapped under the aunt’s thumb she overdosed again // still isn’t quite sure herself if it was intentional or not. she half has the idea that she is immortal, that Death itself doesn’t want her. she is also incredibly self conscious of the scars on her arms and keeps them covered almost every single moment of the day, waking or not, whether by sleeves, fingerless gloves, that sort of measures.
in terms of wardrobe she wears a haphazard combination of most of whatever she happens to grab hold of. she is the epitome of glitter grunge. she will wear ten dollar jeans with a two dollar tank top from goodwill and a ratty sweater that belonged to her dad for twenty years with six hundred dollar shoes and a twenty thousand dollar necklace and not even think about it / bat an eye or care. makeup is a constant but it’s just as much a mess and mix. nails are always kept short to keep from getting in the way of her playing but usually painted (chipped of course) and ink stained.
she is usually a mess of bruises of one kind or another whether it’s from shooting up or getting into a fight or a fist fight with her current fuck boy that got pissed at her for whatever fucking reason under the sun. she has a horrible horrible horrible horrible history with relationships. she doesn’t believe in them. people die people leave people beat her up people abuse her use her take her money steal her drugs lock her up you name it. she has maybe one or two friends in the mass of humanity and they had better be well used to her absolute bipolar madness that is only made worse with her drug use and addiction of the month. fickle is her middle name, but let’s be real if you get under her skin and into that one little tiny miniscule part of her heart she will literally fight tooth and nail for you and will do anything to keep you safe (from anybody but herself honestly…) and would literally die if it meant you’d be ok. this is not something that most people would ever get the chance to see or know but because this is the rp world it’d probably more likely that a larger number of plots will creep into that role because i can…
she also totally needs fuck buddies and enemies and people that abuse the fuck out of her because… again… i can
she is always listening to music. she reads everything and anything and almost always has a book shoved into her purse or back pocket or backpack. she speaks at least five or six languages. she hates math but she’s really good at it but she’ll never admit it. wickedly intelligent. never EVER uses contractions, it’s a huge huge huge pet peeve. always has a russian accent when she speaks english because it pisses off her aunt but she’s absolutely capable of speaking perfect and flawlessly, accent free at her whim. she’s also got an amazing singing voice, and if you get her drunk or high enough she will serenade you or kick ass at karaoke.
she loves animals but refuses to keep any because she knows she is entirely incapable of that amount of responsibility.
she has dropped out of school. she could easily get her ged and even probably test out of a lot of subjects at a collegiate level even in her teen / late teen verse and even without her formal education via public schools or anything. she did have private tutors with her manager and on tour and such which was a wonderful experience for her because she was so so hungry for knowledge but she can’t stand going to school with the idiots that are the mainstream american teen and she cannot stand the teaching to the lowest common denominators so she just doesn’t bother. if anyone bothers to ask her aunt says she is being homeschooled with private tutors and what not and, there was some attempt at making that a reality but after her aunt walked in on petra and her tutor banging in the manor’s library, that was discontinued.
on that note as far as sex goes any pretense of being a good girl has never really been a thing for petra. she was molested and abused by her manager, whom she was given over to at the age of seven when she was being pushed into performing and writing and studying and just very very very much being pushed to excel in every way with her musical abilities. she saw her parents on very few occasions, holidays and when she was on vacation from classes, and whenever they decided they wanted to come see her perform. they were not lacking for money by a long shot – her father had seized a number of businesses when everything fell apart and was making a killing financially, her mother was a noble (minor title) – they were just very busy and very focused on their own lives —- which is not to say they didn’t dote on petra, because they did, they just thought they were doing what was best for her by letting her throw herself into her passion.
unfortunately with no other continuous adult supervision, her blossoming mental and emotional instabilities and the control (physical, mental, emotional, financial) that her manager had over her, she never reached out or acknowledged anything in regards to the abuse even after she was abandoned by him and even during her time in the institution and after. ie she’s never told anyone. her parents died when she was thirteen on the way to a grand premiere performance at a renowned hall (have to do some research to see if i can remember which one i’d settled on). they were run off the road by another car. it was believed an accident but it was actually a hit by one of her father’s business partners [ she has never learned this so she blames herself entirely ] and her parents were rushed to a hospital nearby where she was performing. her manager was informed, but he chose not to inform her until after her portion of the performance. she arrived at the hospital basically in time to sit with her father for a few minutes before he died. her mother had died in the interim.
she was institutionalized a year later after her manager gave up his custody of her due to the fact that she would not perform and would not compose and refused to do anything in terms of her music for anyone // combined with the fact that she was now reaching mid-teens, he had no more use for her and dropped her like a hot potato when she tried to kill herself.
in terms of sexuality as a whole, she gives no cares at all for anything in terms of morality. she sleeps with anyone she wants, or anyone (mostly) that wants to sleep with her if she can get something out of them, or if she needs a place to crash, or a ride from one end of town to the other, or finds them attractive or is high and doesn’t care. she’ll sleep with men or women, girls, boys, one, two, many. the more it hurts, the more she feels the better she likes it, which means especially when she’s high on something like ecstasy or heroin. she drinks, like all the time, but she laughs it off as saying she’s russian its vodka which means its like americans and water.
she has scripts for medications for her bipolar depressive disorder and acute anxiety, add, etc. but she really only fills them so she can sell the or for things like her sleep meds when she really needs to crash out she’ll take a handful, she’ll take a handful of her add meds to stay awake and buys scripts for pain meds on a constant basis to level out any other high or crash etc. etc.
she likes sleeping with older men, married ones, married ones with families especially, though she is just as happy to fuck him and his wife if that’s his thing. she likes fucking angry men too, teen or above, and she definitely definitely pushes everybody’s buttons just daring them to beat the shit out of her and/or have their way with her. she is the type that can be on the ground, the guy on top of her, fucking her and throttling her / and or literally punching her for sassing off and she’d just laugh and spit the blood back in their faces. she is rarely likely to call anything with a guy a ‘relationship’
she’s definitely not as violent seeking instinctively when it comes to females she’s just as masochistic with them if the opportunity presents itself. she does tend to be less angsty / violent / sadistic towards anyone of the female persuasion that she sleeps with, and is definitely more likely to have a repeat performance combined with something that resembles a friendship before during and or after the fact.
she has zero problems being somebody’s fucktoy and encourages age gaps in her own relationships but. if it ever came to her attention that somebody was messing with a kid / their kid / somebody else’s kid (and it probably has given the type of people she usually opts to hang out with) it will not end well. as in, in different rps over the years, she’s hired hitmen and or people to castrate people sexually abusing children. physically, she might not hire someone to KILL them but she probably finds a way to encourage a few guys to give the asshole a taste of their own medicine (ironically, unless it’s her aunt who does still physically abuse petra when petra is around and doesn’t do what she wants)
she encourages corruption of self and others, outside of that one area, however and is a hedonist in all things. despite her roman catholic upbringing / because of her roman catholic upbringing she hates religion and, not surprisingly, thinks that if there is a god he’s an absolute asshole and should basically fuck off and die. she has a branding of a pentacle on the back on her neck, following the junction of neck and shoulders about three inches high in almost every verse. she has a multitude of piercings and some tattoos (they tend to vary a lot on verse specific things).
dededos
pixelskylines
tangentwithtanner
vaporwave
areudirty
kianamaiart
janainaart
