@silvcrpanthera

❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
Keni

JVL
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
Three Goblin Art

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art blog(derogatory)
noise dept.
styofa doing anything
trying on a metaphor

@theartofmadeline
todays bird

tannertan36

祝日 / Permanent Vacation
Cosmic Funnies

Kiana Khansmith
Misplaced Lens Cap
Show & Tell

★
Stranger Things

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@silvcrpanthera
@silvcrpanthera
timeline: valentine’s, february 14th.
@drvgonbvnny
What could be a more splendid tableau than indulging in Valentine’s twilight en plein air with one’s cherished consort, particularly after navigating the squalls life had relentlessly hurled at them over past years? The imprints of absconded Valentines still echoed poignantly within Sera’s consciousness — their existence marked by naught but the sterile bite of intoxicating lancets they were compelled to weather instead of melting into the sanctuary ensconced within their paramour’s embrace. The present, however? Perhaps time’s sand trickled predominantly in favor of their nascent progeny, yet they seized slivers such as these and wrung out every conceivable drop of rapture from them. Thus was precisely what the erstwhile celestial had envisioned — a wanderlust-fueled sojourn with no predetermined terminus; an aimless perambulation wherein they could halt and savor hitherto unacquainted gustatory experiences. A smile blossomed upon their countenance akin to dawn breaking across a tranquil horizon; swathed in myriad layers of warm couture and scarfing, they embarked beyond the confines of their homestead. Yet nothing riveted such allure as much as Dusty’s familiar presence flanking them. “All primed up for our little venture?” They queried softly, cradling their head into Dusty’s shoulder — a gesture marrying comfort and intimacy. “I was thinking we could go with spicy rabokki… Then spring from there. What do you say?” They muttered with a peck to his cheek.
where : creamery ice cream & coffee bar
when : june 14th
@silvcrpanthera
DESPITE NOT VOLUNTEERING TO HELP in the search for the missing girl, Zeliha was still being kept busy. They were, of course, conducting their own search for information that didn't require navigating the dense Alaskan woods, but rather hacking into the girl's social media in an attempt to see if anything could be discovered there. With Javed's talented abilities, it didn't prove to be as difficult as it would have been if the investigator had try to do it on their own. However, they had no issue taking a break some scrolling the direct messages of a girl they had never even met when a text came in front Sera, not taking long at all to drop what they were doing and head out the door. "Hi, sweetie," they greeted with a warm smile that was usually reserved for their best friend and Godchild, who didn't seem to be in attendance, as they slid into the booth across from them. "Have you been kept busy with the supply runs? I can't seem to go three feet without seeing a flyer, so it looks like you guys have doing a fair job there." Their head nodded back at the front of the shop, before asking, "Did you already order something? I'd suggest a hot tea, if they have any. You know, instead of a coffee since a bunch of caffeine might not be the best right now." Zeliha could only imagine it wouldn't help with a frazzled mood.
If anyone were to confess to deliberately shutting out all but a select few, it would be the erstwhile star. Their mind churned tirelessly and concocted justifications for this mindset, intertwining it with the belief that both they and their spouse deserved a long-overdue respite. And truly, what harm lay in cocooning themselves, hands pressed to ears, if it allowed them undivided focus on their significant other? It was a self-centered habit, indeed, but Sera had never embodied the saintly image projected by their past vocation nor did they intend to start now. The world could spin on as long as those dear to them continued to find solace in their shared haven. That these two so diametrically different in approach remained the closest of companions was a notion as amusing as it was profound. To prod fun of it would be something they would refuse — people like Zeliha, more than likely, were what Anchorage just needed. And so they aided, the best they could, even when their mind pit-pattered away from the crux of the peril. “Undoubtedly— Ducky and I have been bustling about non-stop, not to mention the baby demanding all the attention. Everything around here feels so tense.” Not a surprise whatsoever. Long tresses curtained a pitched huff as they leaned back, inhaling deeply. “Mhm. Hot tea’s already on the way. How have you been doing, Zee? Please, please tell me you have at least been getting enough sleep.”
@silvcrpanthera ; in the parlour at the bar, before 11.30PM
The way his spine straightened as he spotted Sera returning from one of the bathrooms in the mansion was visceral, relief palpable across his features and melting away the anxieties squirming around his guts after the encounter he'd had. "Cece," he called out to them, as if it would hasten their stride to the heroic elven's side. Dustin's hand sought for theirs, his drink beside him drained to soften the souring of his mood. "Can... we go hang out... somewhere else? Quieter? Por favor? Is that okay?" They'd already been dancing in the parlour, in spite of his body's unwillingness to coordinate with what his mind wanted and sabotaging him with an atonic seizure or two. He'd wanted to sit down to rest, and they were having fun... he didn't want to spoil it. The sensation of their palm in his comforted him, and his free hand gestured to himself, trying to articulate, "This guy kinda hit on me, and... I dunno." After a pause, he reached for their drink. "But... I got your favorite, hunny."
It was a fair assessment that although they harbored no grievances about the attire itself, it had been an age since they had donned such distinctly feminine garb in the public eye. The challenge of navigating the gown’s ample fabric without mishap had been a minor ordeal. Yet, any awkwardness evaporated the instant their spouse captured their gaze — as he was wont to do. Years at his side had honed their acuity in observation, gently unraveling their own self-centered desires. They delighted in the dance but recognized the signs of his inner turmoil; a quiet, impending collapse to which they had become intimately attuned. Intuition alone sufficed to grasp his need for their tender touch and solace. The erstwhile luminary held no grudge for this — they understood Dusty’s hesitance to dampen spirits, the silent burden of his internal strife.
Without a moment’s delay they approached him, brows knit with both concern and an instinctive protection — which might have bordered on possessiveness had their priority not been Dusty’s welfare. With a tease tinted with affection, they aimed to ease his tension. “Well. It appears someone has missed the glaring notice that I do not, in fact, share what’s mine,” a quip meant to coax back the comfort between them, if such a thing remained possible. Leaning close, they pressed their lips against his to hush their next words. “Thank you, hun, but I’m more concerned about you now. We should get some fresh air — maybe you could help me adjust this dress as well? It’s gotten… A little stuffy.” A chuckle, then in a reassuring effort, another kiss was placed on the side of his neck. “Ducky. You do know you can always tell me when you feel uncomfortable, yes? I don’t give a flying shit about this party if you aren’t feeling well.”
RILEY KEOUGH & SAM CLAFLIN in DAISY JONES & THE SIX (2023) Track 6: Whatever Gets You Thru The Night
@silvcrpanthera
SETTING: anchorage regional hospital, february 15th, 8 am
OPEN STARTER! ( 3/4 ) ( @anchoragestarters )
after arriving at her apartment, sarai did try to sleep. she really did! however, it was still. it was way too still and it was falling cold, thanks to the heater going out along with the power. she did have one of those movable heaters, but it had to be plugged in. with no power, there was absolutely no way for her to be warm enough in this apartment, meaning there was no way for her to sleep or, for that matter completely stay here. so, she packed a bag filled with all the necessary items (including some uniforms and a blanket) and made her way out of the apartment, opting to go and sleep at work for the time being. when she arrived there, some of her co-workers (who were still hoping to make it up to sarai for her blind date not showing up) could see it in her eyes that she did not want to be bothered at the moment. there, at the hospital where there were enough people for her to feel safe and secure and it was warm, sarai fell asleep. when she woke up, she freshened up and changed into her uniform. this leads her to the present, where she was was walking and noticed something on the ground. " excuse me, " she called out, her voice still a little quiet but audible, even with all the people here at the hospital. she reached down, picking the object up and looking down at it. " i think you dropped something. i-is this yours? "
The hospital was not necessarily a place that they frequented—and they sure as hell hoped it would never have to be after all they had gone through—alas, there were a few occasions in which their presence would be demanded. For check-ups, prominently, ensuring that they were kept updated regarding ways to ensure their spouse’s condition as well as their own needs — their hearing aids couldn’t remain unchecked for too long, anyway. It seemed to be an abundance at once, particularly with the unrest that had been stewing about in the tight-knit town, and the paranoia that something perilous could land on their family remained to adhere their mind. Even now, when they were supposed to be fixating on their own route back home, not realizing the purse which had glissaded down their purse. When they were approached, it took them a moment to respond— a common reaction when they were unable to glimpse and observe someone’s lips. nevertheless, they were fortunate enough to have at least felt the presence. Sera’s chin craned north, a look of bewilderment seemed to paint across their features for a second, and then it stretched into a recognition. “Oh— thank you very much.” The former starlet muttered, adjusting themself so they were facing their savior with enough ease. “Things have just been so hectic here — it would have been even more hassling to lose this. Truly, I owe you,” they chuckled, that billion-dollar smile etching. “Is there anything I can do in return?”
drvgonbvnny:
Birthdays lost meaning as he aged, ceased to uphold an ounce of mystical energy to it as if no day would compare and that he deserved to chow down on fifteen seconds of spotlight and lavished attentions. Alas, the pickled whimsies weren’t as elegant as his studies anymore, and refined wonderment was reserved for their miracle baby — the one they hadn’t expected nor planned, and adored as if the fairies from Zelda had manifested and kissed their cheeks graciously. It was a day like any other, one that usually ended on a high note since he’d been married, except for one lonesome birthday spent alone, albeit banal to most — a kiss goodnight, well wishes for the new year, for prosperity. Christmas was celebratory solely in commercialization and perhaps peppering a little extra excitement into their days, and the day after festivities when everyone was exhausted was not oft an occasion that people thought about nor treated with hyperbolic summations. Dustin reserved himself to recline on the couch as any other evening, picking through reruns of Ancient Aliens and Star Trek with his phone tucked aside and ignored for the time being. It was his way of decompressing, or perhaps recuperating from pitfalls in mental health; tonight, it was merely for the quietude, indulging in the serenity of committing to a bantam activity whilst the sound of Sera in the background satiated the desideratum for security.
His focus was broken, inherently, when the temptress of the night sought to clamber behind him and dance their fingertips around to his front, as he laid around in his pyjamas following a routinely shared bath ( what choice did he have, in his condition, but he didn’t mind it ), his poorly eye dancing around focus of anywhere but their face when he tilted his head to the side enough to seek for their countenance. The blurrier image of the starlet in his peripheral was met with a gentle press of the broad expanse of his back pressing back against their chest, giggling. “Lie down?” he echoed, eyes dancing as their serpentine, sleek figure slithered into his lap, a delighted grin tearing over his visage brightly, “…Enjoyable massage, you say? It’s been a while.” There was lightheartedness in acknowledging the dystonic episodes that had cropped up as much as his GTC seizures prior to the winter break, but gradually, the stress levels were deliquescing. ( Needless to say, hand massages were painful. ) Obediently, he swiveled to prop his feet on the armrest of the couch and lowered himself down to the cushions, blue ombre locks splaying across the throw pillow. Large palms clasped their thighs, thumbs massaging the inked flesh. “You look so pretty. I really like how the dimple piercings turned out, you know.”
An exaltation of the senses, a spectacle to behold with reverence, though to the uninitiated eye it may seem banal. The glistening jubilation etched upon a beloved's countenance elicits a rush of euphoria, a purifying cascade washing away the remnants of afflictions past. The satisfaction adorning their significant other's visage was the sole aspiration of Sera, their laughter, a cathartic release from former torments, serving as a constant reminder of the happiness they sought to bring to their cherished one at every encounter. The memories of days long past, when excitement abounded, and countless hours spent in effervescent conversation, flooded their mind. The mere sight of their partner convulsed in mirth was a delight beyond measure, but to have thim stand before them, eyes locked in an intimate gaze, filled with the anticipation of untold wonders to come, was an indescribable bliss. It was not something that Sera had ever been fed, in the youthful days with stringent gazes of a family they could barely register, and then a limelight where each gesture of theirs would be put under the scrutiny that would forgive nothing but the absolute perfection. Here, in simplicity, with his endearing spears of grin and a welcoming sight, no matter what mundane offerings they were bringing—tasted like a paradise of their own. There was much that had not been executed nor spoken out loud just yet, but one thing was for sure, he would certainly hear about all the things they wanted him to receive. The former starlet pushed out a joyous chuckle of their own. "Mhm. Although try not to fall asleep yet, I may have a few more surprises up my sleeve, if you aren’t too tired. Are you?"
Such was the lighthearted exchange between the two lovers, bubbling through all four walls of the living room. They basked in the uninterrupted reverie of tranquility while the evening's gleam shone down on them; and even though it was only the beginning of the eventide, Sera knew it wasn't going to be long before it reached its zenith. This day marked the culmination of many months of planning, and even more so of anticipation, and they couldn't quite believe they actually got to share it together. Of course, there were seconds in which their fixation would need to be brandished elsewhere—the coos of their babe's was naught but an admission of what awaited them in the other room, but for now, for now they could rejoice and bask in what they had. Their digits ventured downward, and they performed ministrations pleasurable enough that one could cushily drift from the sensation. It was not something cultivated from experienced fingers, rather ripened from years of alleviating Dusty's predicaments. Teasingly, the brown-and-blue-haired vixen pinched on his nipples, before simpering down at their beloved. "You're only saying that because you were the one who suggested it," it was nothing more than a sly tug, nothing harmless, exhilaration still burning bright in those eyes. "Where else would you like to see me pierced, hm? What if we go out and have that done tomorrow? Maybe have something that could match again?" They spread their fingertips, across the knots on his torso—the touch was sprinkled with a spice of seduction whilst they sauntered slowly, around the areas that were not necessarily—tensed, so to speak, such as the lines down to his crotch. "Hopefully Crash has not been bothering you too much on your birthday, hm? Did he give you any trouble when I was in the shower?"
SHERRYSTIRRED: My dearest star-seeker, Ducky, as we celebrate yet another anniversary, it feels as though the passage of time has been interminable, enveloped in the warmth of your embrace and traversing the expanse of celestial realms alongside you. At times, I struggle to recall the exact duration of our union, whether it be in matrimony or simply as devoted paramours, for it seems as though you have been a constant presence in my life from the very inception. You are my first love and will forever remain my last, and to this day, I vividly recall the moment of my initial encounter with you at the back of that circus tent, and the profound impact it had on my understanding and perception of love. You have transformed my worldview, and for that, I am eternally grateful.The joy of being in your company on this special occasion is immeasurable, and I find myself constantly expressing my gratitude for the blessings of our union. We have shared in both the highs and lows of life, and it is of of massive importance to me that you remain by my side, even now, as our circumstances may have altered. I still behold the same person who first captured my attention, with your alluring complexity and endearing vulnerabilities. Though others may have doubted the possibility of our union, it has come to fruition and here we are, together. And that is what matters the most, the pinnacle of our love, even with all the shit that we had to endure. Our love has remained unwavering and steadfast, and I assure you that I will always be there for you.
To speak candidly, it is difficult for me to fully convey the depth of my appreciation for the fact that fate brought us together, through all the trials and tribulations that we have faced. You have been my guiding light and rock, and the statement that you have helped me to grow as an individual is a gross understatement. There have been times in my life when I was entrenched in resistance, and you were there for me, just as you were the first time we spoke. The nights and days spent in each other's company, the opening of my heart to you, and your unwavering belief in the eternal nature of love has been a source of immeasurable comfort. And here we are, many years later, and nothing has changed. I do not regret a single moment spent with you, let alone the years, for each has been a source of true happiness, safety and love. Without you, my world would be devoid of meaning, but with a single moment in your presence, everything is beautifully inverted. You care for me with such tenderness, highlighting my strengths and being my panacea for all that ails, even from afar, I am safe in the embrace of your benevolent love. You deserve nothing but the best, and I promise to always strive to give it to you. That is why I love you, to prove the immeasurable value you hold in my heart. The mere sight of your smile quickens my pulse, and I often wonder, how did I come to be so blessed as to have you in my life?
When did we fall in love? When is it predetermined to happen forever? Perhaps it was from the dawn of time, if one believes in the concept of soulmates. Your mere presence enriches my life, my heart races and my hands sweat when you're near, my body relaxes and my mind empties when you speak. No words can do justice to your astounding being, and I desire nothing more than to remain by your side until the end of time and beyond, through reincarnation. It is unfair that you make me the happiest person alive, with your daily smiles and kisses that banish any trace of sorrow. You have shown me time and again how fortunate I am to be wed to someone like you.
[ dated: december 29th ]
@drvgonbvnny
⊙ + dusty
| Admirable | Attractive | Absentminded | Amusing | Abrasive | Aloof | Arrogant | Brilliant | Bizarre | Bland | Caring | Charming | Clever | Confident | Courageous | Creative | Cute | Careless | Childish | Clumsy | Cowardly | Cruel | Dignified | Dramatic | Desperate | Devious | Disrespectful | Elegant | Energetic | Emotional | Excitable | Faithful | Forgiving | Friendly | Flamboyant | Foolish | Frightening | Generous | Gloomy | Greedy | Gullible | Helpful | Honest | Hateful | Intelligent | Ignorant | Impulsive | Insensitive | Irresponsible | Lovable | Lazy | Mature | Malicious | Misguided | Monstrous | Narrow-minded | Optimistic | Obnoxious | Peaceful | Persuasive | Protective | Power-hungry | Quirky | Reliable | Romantic | Ridiculous | Sexy | Sophisticated | Selfish | Trusting | Treacherous | Understanding | Unpredictable | Unstable | Vulnerable | Witty | Weak |
sms 📞 jo
Dusty: You know, I don't think it's what I meant.
Dusty: How many drinks deep are you??
Dusty: Every conversation we have ends up with you saying backhanded shit to me. Admit you'd rather wallow in your self-pity and have me comfort you and you don't have to apologize anymore.
Jo: Read yesterday.
Today
Jo: I really didn't know who else to message. He's blocked me, Dustin. After everything HE'S blocked me, no apology, no nothing. He's just given up on me just like that. He wants nothing to do with me. I don't know what to do. I know I'd hurt him but I didn't really think that this would be it. At first I thought my messages weren't delivering but my calls just don't go through. I thought I'd have another chance.
Sera: That is your cue to back the fuck off, grandma. Were you never taught to respect someone's space?
Sera: Do you even REALIZE how you sound like?
Sera: Leave him alone. I cannot promise to stay patient if you keep pestering us. It's a miracle that he was still willing to talk to you after what you tried to do with our KID.
💬 + you're a great kisser
“I’d like to think so. I think Dusty’s absolutely endearing, ever-lasting, dreamy faces whenever we kiss are a good enough evidence to that, yes?”
[ timeline: 26th december, 2022. ]
Birthdays and surprises—Sera could only recall preparing them in fragments. They remembered a tepid kitchen with a supple bed, the taste of sugar icing on their tongue as they lay there waiting for Dusty to come home. Perhaps it had been a goodnight kiss, a simple "happy birthday" or an awkward but sincere wish that they would have the best life imaginable. Something that made them blush when they thought about it. Something that brought warmth to their chest despite the wintry December air surrounding them on their balcony. Sera was a covert romantic at heart, especially for tattered souls, who still believed such things existed, even though many years had passed and all those romantic notions seemed foolish and naive to them now, except for when Dusty was in the picture. Him and his inept, toothy smiles, his love for the humility which they had chiseled, his devotion to them even when they had not been the best at what they did. All the reasons behind why they loved him—they loved him, with the debris and the decrepit stones. He was seamless, and he was theirs, just as much as they were his, and he always would be. And years be damned, they would always pine for the best for his birthday—to share this one day, to experience his warmth again. To know what it felt like to have his hands caress their face, his lips brushing against those red-flushed cheeks, the gentle press of his forehead against theirs as he blew the candle. To recall that they were now able to do this with tranquility now, with a newborn babe in their arms—a second opportunity for an ecstasy not bound to scattered pills. Though, they had to admit, what they had in mind now was anything but puerile, or tranquil. When the eve arrived after their celebration, they lurked behind him as he was seated on the couch. The former starlet’s dainty fingertips dragged across his chest from behind, sprawling across his chest, as their lips nuzzled the underpart of his jawline. They were shrouded in a robe, pale flesh glistening in dim glimmers. “Ducky, lie down. Let me spoil you a bit more—when was the last time you had an enjoyable massage, hm?” Sera was coquettish, as they had always been, clambering onto his lap without a caution and straddling him. “I still have a present that you have not unwrapped, birthday babe.”
@drvgonbvnny
SHERRYSTIRRED: To my favorite constellation - shining brighter than even the most glimmering stars, happy birthday, my dearest. It delights me how we are able to spend another year celebrating this, and when I say that I am extremely prideful of what you have gone through all these years, I mean it with every speck of my troubled but loving little heart. I cannot ease away the reminders of when we celebrated your first birthday together - I was so fussed up, you see, I, someone who had cared so little about things around me, become so tangled with wanting to ensure that you would come home to something that would not only flutter your soul, but make you feel at home immediately. That feeling has never once faded, I still aim for the same thing, every year, even if it is not your birthday - but I suppose birthdays are the days when you indeed have to glamorize things even more, yes? And you rightfully deserve all the pampering in the world. This year we have gotten to do so much - the things that were building up coming to a blissful conclusion when we decided to wed again as well as give another try at parenting. Both of them were something that I remember I was so nerve-racked about, but we did it, like we always had, and now that we have a new chapter ahead of us, I’m so endlessly excited to be venturing those new days with you. There is nothing else that I would rather do it with, you are my one and only, and you have always been.
I may have prepared a little something-something or two for when you return home. Part of me wishes that classes are still on so I can surprise you there :) alas, it should not take away the thrill of seeing your face when you return. For starters, though, I also made a reservation for this nice Mexican restaurant that we would hoard back in the old days - and a ticket to the closest Monster Jam gig. That is just the surface, as I plan on pampering you all day. There are some things that I cannot say in public which I’m sure you would absolutely love as well - I do hope that you enjoyed the breakfast that I made you this morning, though! It’s a bit hard doing stuff still with the babe crying every five seconds, but thankfully it’s not at all our first rodeo so I suppose we have grown some sort of immunity to the sudden wailing. Tee-hee. Regardless, I think Crash is just as excited for his lovely parent’s birthday - he was so fussy this morning and he kept wanting to reach out for you. I suppose we’re both eager then! I love you, my favorite star, I am hoping that there will be many more ventures ahead of us. We have been together for so long, and yet, it always feels like it was just yesterday my bumbling mind imploded upon thinking of you. I feel like a giddy adolescent all over again, when I think of that, when I think of you. I am fortunate to have you, and to have this life with you. Here is for more years of us together.
Forever you and I. Happy birthday, star-seeker.
@drvgonbvnny
drvgonbvnny:
There was a question asked to him once upon a time, when he’d been dog-eared auspiciously as the line-up of the reality dating spot that the couple to-be for the second time had found each other: Are you afraid of falling? He said no, but that he didn’t believe in love, in an unblemished sense of romance. Dustin had witnessed his parents interfused in an ardency for one another, and there was nary a speck out of place within their adoring, albeit transient, space of raising children — and yet, this notion had accrued in his early, liberal studies of the sciences and crunching through general subjects, that the love that could be offered to a partner was not absolute and indomitable, but an ephemeral and codependent attachment for serving their natural purpose. Loving his siblings unconditionally held an entirely juxtaposing merit, that he was in a bantam desideratum, driven to adore them, without pause and without quandary, for the blood and the early roots that they shared together. Dominating the fickle challenge of gravity in his adolescence from the highest perches and performing tricks from phenomenal spaces, aspiring in his early career to launch away in a starship for the space station or to take the first footsteps on planet Jupiter, he could confidently answer that it was not a phobia that nestled into the nettles of his wounded chest. Merely, it had never cupped his cheeks as the fairies watching over their fountains within the trenchancy of caverns would, kissing the concaves of his countenance and blessing him with their virtue. Yet, against all odds, it was the sound of Sera’s voice from behind blockaded walls and pulchritudinously decorated rooms, that he thought that a deity had descended from sight unseen to flutter heartstrings like the cords of those high above and deliver a message. A fantastical conclusion of one rigidly secular, tithed to the ecstatic belief of the extraterrestrial.
But, they were only human. A determinate that could be borne from trialing hardships with them, ones so Galgameth that he was brittle in the pessimism whether two who were but normal people could never conquer. With hyperawareness to the snapping of his own synapses within his skeletal casing and mildly hitched breaths, he was stripped of his breaths at what his gaze befell when their entrance was announced. Yulan magnolias clutched tightly at the breadth of his chest, an unmatched set of eyes thieved by the iniquities of life shaded behind them as if a shyness were to cleave his ebullience, the shades that warmed his cheeks matched the exotic flowers that his hands were diligently wrapped around. Instantly, his heart quickened, thinking not of their son passed to Zeliha’s vigilant clutch, a record stop-gapped on the bolide enchanting his vision with their sublime smile and the gleam within the depths of their eyes that everyone would frequently dismiss as apathetic pools if they never bothered to ask of what Sera was passionate about. Don’t you think they always look so empty? was a query he’d received on a handful of occasions of other surviving couples of their reality stint, and he found it arduous to ascribe what he saw as a dedicated astrophile. You’ll never know the worlds that I see in the darkness if you don’t fall into the black hole. For their vastness was indescribable, intangible to those who refused to venture that far past the shallows of the stratosphere. Frozen in time, an exhale escaped and deflated the tense hitch of his shoulders encased in the striped suit jacket and expensive, white Chanel undershirt once they were before him, holding out the bouquet for them to take and awaiting to release it until their petite digits stroked over his. Crooked fingers of his grace the edge of their veil, a sharp inhale to stifle the tears ready to prick the corners of his eyes already. You are ethereal, he signed.
Speak on marriage and what it means to you.
A part of him felt like combusting as much as the first time, for contrasting reasons — for compared to their first, how was he to describe just how he felt for them now? He stood silent for what seemed centuries, his throat turning to sandpaper and consuming the saliva available to traction his words. “Sera… Is love truly blind? We opted into a social experiment together… not knowing where it would take us. I never thought I would meet someone there who shared so much with me — from the personal, of losing our parents and growing up alone, and the superficial, vast ambitions and yearning for something bigger than ourselves. We were so young, eighteen and twenty-one, I didn’t imagine we’d be expecting a baby in our world within less than a year after that. I thought…” He blinked, doe eyes downcast when he sought for their hands to interlink with his. “When you saw me for the first time, you would be disappointed. I was sure that no matter how you looked, my heart would wait for you, with open arms of whatever the outcome. Speakin’ to you through a wall, how ravenously I craved someone like they were from the heavens, like you were this… magnificent and untouchable creature, I still can’t wrap my head around how smoothly our union was, to this day. And somehow…” Another breath was inhaled to steady the execution of his words, the tremulous markers that he had long enclosed behind the ivories of his teeth against lonely bedsheets, or the ones that they had occupied at his side in his brother’s townhouse, fingers stroking through their agrestal locks and pondering how they could wish to strip themselves of what made them appear as stardust trickling through his fingertips. “I have these memories that will be burned into my brain always, of those early years. I can’t forget the way your fingers ran across every ridge of my spine and every freckle that you would kiss when I laid in our bed in the summers, appreciatin’ every inch of me without my clothes on as no one ever had — comparin’ me to stars and space. How you would… listen to me so eagerly, try to grasp what I was rambling about and look up what you couldn’t. Wake me up when I fell asleep waitin’ for you on the couch and ask me to come to bed… you’d hold me so tight, I would replay your breaths on my neck when you weren’t beside me, breathin’ me in as if you couldn’t get enough. The awe in your voice, tellin’ all your friends in your hospital bed how Jungwoon looked just like me. I couldn’t understand how someone could be so — taken by me, when all I was was… some nobody with a dream, but you jumped out of the porch swing when I brought my car for your things. I believed in fallin’ in love, bein’ in love, because someone showed me what it looks like. It think it’s my greatest discovery.”
His gaze lifted, looking into theirs with feverish attempts to still the intrinsic shaking of his amblyopic eye, and resist the longing to press his forehead against theirs as if no one else were present with them at the fairgrounds. See, when it was them, embracing as mundanely as their hands, how he longed for it to be a moment where they could suck one another into their orbit relentlessly, so fervidly that no one could understand. As composed and aplomb as they could both be, one with an antisocial personality disorder and the other an inherent empath, there was an unraveling of cosmos when Sera was near. It demanded to be felt. “We’ve changed, haven’t we? I would have waited for the rest of my days, hopin’ you’d come back.” The bittersweet twinge was fleeting, squeezing on their hands taut and imploring as he permitted himself a step forward, “You push me away and we’re runnin’ back like we can’t breathe, like I abandoned you into open space without a helmet. My hands can’t get enough of you, I’m the dark matter and you pull me in like the black hole, I am so desperate, always, to be consumed by your love. I could get on my knees and beg for it, I probably would have if you had not broken our separation first, you’ll never understand — the way that…” Dustin swallowed, recapturing his words and pressing his thumbs against their knuckles, searching the depths of their amber hues. “There is an empty space without you, how cold and unforgivin’ space feels when you had to be distant. I have… never felt like someone pulled me out of the grave and put the fucking breath back into my body than when you invited me over and stripped me clean right there, barely a step through the door and you’re revivin’ me with your kisses. The first thing I saw was you when I woke up from the coma they put me in, I didn’t dream of ever being without you. I was freezin’, I was scared, couldn’t see out of half my face or move my hands and you were there — you didn’t pack your shit and leave when I became half the person that I was once. You gave me your embrace and all the words built up inside you, how happy you were, scared, you —” His nose screwed up, a rapid fluttering of lids dispelling tears blurring his vision and sending them trampling down his face. “You’ve never looked at me differently. Not once. You would defend me every time someone told you differently when you were… famous. Do you know how much that means? I lost a tooth for you, but you? I didn’t ask you to. You did. And after we lost our son, and you wanted me back, I remember lookin’ in your eyes one night and seein’… nothin’ but… nothin’ but want for me, hopin’ that you satisfied me, unconditional yearning for me and so…”
He sniffed, curling his fingers through theirs. “If you’ll have me… with my damaged brain and broken body, after all our counselin’… I’m yours. Every atom and speck of matter within me, I belong to you. You are the only person I have loved, and ever will. The love that I have for you, it transcends time and space itself. I couldn’t write a book about it, but I know that I will always be the keeper of your secrets. Of who you long to be, what you want to be. There’s somethin’ that will always be true for me, no matter what life puts us through.” Untangling their hands, the words were pierced together in FSL to accompany the firm mantra embellished in English, “I’m with you always.”
Will you take this person to be your wedded spouse?
Dustin’s smile was vibrant, however shaky, and immediate as the day that they had first conceived their union. “I do. Always. Every time you ask me.”
With instruction from the officiant, Dustin straightened his posture and carefully repeated, “I, Duck-young Graves-Seong, take you, Sera, to be my spouse, my forever friend, confidant, and my love. I vow to honor and respect you always, and I will give you my love freely and unconditionally. I pledge this to you with all of my heart, for all the days of our lives.” Taking the wedding band they’d temporarily removed in favor of the ceremony, he slid it onto their ring finger. “I give you this ring as a reminder of my love for you.”
Sera first learned of love from its edges in lieu of its beauty. A muffled demise, a shared table between veiled faces, and back then, love had implied naught but a means for survival — a hymn to be sung to many in order to maintain appearances and keep themself above the surface. Love, in more ways than one, had not been violent but rather meaningless, a concept so complicated to comprehend and questioned for its sincerity when all who pleaded for it hoisted some sort of selfish intention. It wasn’t until later in their life that it had made its shift, however, leashing as if a barbed vein when they had least predicted it — like nectar consuming the chasms of their pale-mucked mattress, their flesh, and when they had been overly fresh-faced by the notion of attachment. That night when they had soaked in the festivities of a circus for the first time — their hues landed upon a person so beautiful, so alone, and poked and prodded by what they had concluded to be naught but egotism. There, they had thought, coated in suspicion and fascination when he had approached them as if they had not been a prize to be won, but rather an individual he would then share his thoughts, And his thoughts, Sera believed in no Gods, but his thoughts splayed just as vast as the bridges of Milky Way itself, filled with ambitions and caricatures that one could not have possibly imagined. Sera could remember as clear as crystal, even today, with decades had whirled before them, the way their chest had carried a sense of implosion — the way their eyes would not drift away from his lips, his gestures, him, and him, only. He had been able to engulf them in his universe before she had been able to even float in space and he had carried her with every vocable. To think back of all those times where he had been regarded as not attractive, the concept enough to make them retch these days, it still stupefied them how the hues of the world were so wrapped in conventional pulls, that they had missed out on something more beautiful than anything that the galaxy could offer. There was nothing that they hadn’t fancied, and others could say that their extreme shift to adoration and — in a few ways — over-attachment, had a thing or two with their morbid diagnosis, but Sera had never cared back then, would never care right now, as it was the most realest fragment within the debris of fabrication.
And then, as if flourishing petals, hushes of summer whispering across wintry lands, the sun encapsulating the moon in an embrace so broad, so merciless in its hold, the value of love amplified into the one thing that had bestowed them ambitions and a true sense of safety. Granted, there was nothing about their journey that could be deciphered as a walk in the park — no, a little too far from it, with their own slips and flaws and separation that had exhausted the both of them, a grief so deep that it had yet to, and never would, fully stitch the vacant rims ever again. That was when they realized that love carried both penetrating edges, and fluttering dews, but if anything it had shaped Sera into something they had never thought they were truly capable of being. It made them human. The contorted, mucked up perfection that the world had chiseled them to be dissolved — what they had once predicted to be the long-end of the dim tunnel, disintegrated, as mangled as the downfall that had wreaked havoc in the first place. The recognition did not come as if a slap on their wrist, it bludgeoned them, both of them, and left no place for air to be absorbed as hit by hit shattered them across the powdered tiles, with their dusted palms and guilt scampering over their senses. To call it an actual nightmare would have been an understatement, and yet to mull over it now, gave the black-and-blue beauty some kind of resolve — that the destruction had perhaps summoned in order for them to adhere themself back with lost pieces that had always meant to be there. Those bantam crooked shards that had never been as extravagant as the promises they had so gullibly devoured, him, and him, and his gravity that had meant more than those flashing lights or ceaseless sceneries of packed-suites, and his embrace had been the one that actually completed them. Their love wasn’t necessarily brimstones and fires, but there was an abundance of agony with sturdy arms, learning and developing both as individuals through harsh learnings that eventually ripened them as people. And the beauty of it all, Sera would often hum, merriment springing despite the horrendous flickers, was that they had managed to entrust each other again, a testament of how deep and how put-together, their adoration, their need for each other was. They were fortunate, they supposed, to have learned about all of those things — with him, even when he had not been present, a piece of their mind that could never dissipate.
Words rarely emanated such influences to the core of their soul, once determined as vacant and fissured under the pressure of limelights, but here, in this second, his behaved as a buckler securing around the craters of their pale flesh — hoisting them to cloud nine, or any place where they hadn’t thought possible for serenity to befall. Now that they were soaking this all in again, it felt precisely like this first time, and yet so different all the same. The ornaments garnishing such exquisite corners tasted liberating in their own way, not for their grandiose, but rather, the sensation of relief and gratitude for the second chance that was bestowed upon them. There had been a time where they had thought it could never be something that they would deserve after all the shit they had pulled, deserted, craving for a life of the wildstorm which had given them not only emptiness but also the realization that they had been harming their spouse all along. When their tears were shared in those intimate nights, smelling of cracked nicotine and other substances that they had failed to resist, the batters in their chest had been raucous — reminding of the heart they had ruined, and the joints too young to be engraved below the soil. The recovery and refusal to forgive themself had been as equally long, desiring to ignore their own needs for him for they thought that Dustin’s life would have been better, but it was later, then, when they realized that it wasn’t their choice to make, nor their right to establish. What made this all different was the fact that they carried these ruminations in their mind now — as opposed to the mere enthusiasm of young, budding love, and this time, in the altar, there was some kind of ripening that had been emboldened in the way they presented themself. A trickle, slowly but surely, of certainty, and a love that went deeper than one based on lust and bursts of excitement alone. Like he said, they had grown, as people, as their own selves — and to think they were blessed enough they had discovered each other again, instead of residing separate lives, perhaps Sera would have been consumed by the aridity that had been daunting their senses. Living in sheer luxury, but without even a drip of joy. Here, with him, they were showered in it — in the house that was so mundane, but they had purchased together, a flash of memories where their dreams had been sure pure and ambition-laced before it consumed the former star.
( The massive star might have collapsed, bristled to the ground, but the fragments were garnered by the astronomer — ironically — and ladled into his arms with ease and simultaneously awkwardness that Dustin presented, which they had grown to relish, and now it had disintegrated into specks of stardusts, hovering and warming around them. Sometimes, the star may have to fall for the nebula to truly embrace them and not consume them into the obscure void. )
A smile, one which weighed none of their anterior fabrication, stretched across lips. To allow tears to fall where eyes could witness was a thing they oft refused to allow, but now, ripples whirled, swirling those orbs when their soft hues landed on his, as if the world only spun for them and them alone. “Ducky.” They began. “When I think back of all the times I had thought that love was not meant for someone like me, that it was nothing but a glorified notion, I could not help but realize it was because I kept thinking that there would never be love that could truly match what I had seen, felt, and touched with you. I remember the dimmed moonlight of the circus that we first met, and I remember how after we spent the night together and how you spoke of me of your ambitions, with those endearing, awkward smiles of yours and the way you brushed my skin — I felt something new, an attachment, like a thread connecting us together, something that at a moment tasted more bizarre than what others’ descriptions of love would be. It took me years to realize that it was only because of what everyone kept attempting to tell me, to explain to me, what they meant when they mentioned the word — none of it had been enough to properly elaborate what I had for you. It was, indeed, love, but it was so strong, and so intoxicating, and so unbreakable. I would speak of you on the nights where things were quiet and my old workers would be in awe — they expected tales of a prince, and yet, I described the story of a person who touched the constellations with his lips and fingers. And it was you, it has always been you, through all of those times we spent for the competition, when I heard the way you spoke through those stupid, thick walls, I already that you were the one that I was yearning for. I stopped believing in love — until we met again, because yours was the one that mattered, and came without even any comparison.” If there was one thing that quite irked them about these wedding customs, it would be how they would be leashed away from any opportunities to leap forward and touch him, as they would have, and oh, they would have skated those digits across the supple and coarse lines of his features, strewn across his lips when he spoke and they paid attention to his vocable and his only, the living and the dead around them silenced with a muffled hush. “The last thing that I felt when I saw you was disappointment — I care so little about appearances when they have been tossed around in such a shallow manner for as long as I have lived. But you? You are not just not like any other, your eyes speak billions of words that the universe cannot even comprehend, your lips, the softest that I taste, the ones who keep me bristling for your touch without an end, and your nose — the way it scrunches when you laugh, it gives me the littlest bouts of happiness whenever I see it. You are striking, and you are undoubtedly the most beautiful, magnificent person that I have ever known — and I will remind you of that, every second, if I have to.”
None of those syllables were a reminder of Sera’s olden speeches, none that one would capture behind a thin-glass screen providing a make-shift rumor mill, rather sincerity that crawled and flowed without an end. Those little chasms in the exhales, the cracks, they were but a glissading entourage of the ceaseless, ceaseless amor. “We have indeed gone through a lot, sometimes it does feel like we have gone through the most — with our grief, with our separation, I believe it is safe to say not everyone’s love could be resurrected after everything that we have endured. We might not have come unscathed, no far from it, there are scars within our souls that have been marred so deeply that they will never mend — but despite all of that, we have each other, we found trust in our familiarities, faith when we thought we were hitting our rock bottom only to see the other one standing at the edge of the tunnel. We crashed, so badly, Ducky, but we soared back from it just as beautifully as the first time if not more. When you were absent from my life, I woke up every day, relieved every second, with this huge emptiness in my heart. It was as if carrying a weight that was intangible, something that could crush me within seconds, but when we started to familiarize ourselves with each other again, it almost felt like you had never left You collapsed so perfectly into my arms, and I, yours, we were two souls enlightened again, two kindles of a bigger flame that warm instead of destroy.” By now, the wetness which sprang to their cheeks was almost blurring their entire vision - shushing their surroundings even more. For a moment, they pondered, with a fragile, unseen digit, if Jungwoon was peering over them. He would be joyous, they thought, he would chime in with his endless giggles at how bright the smiles on his parents’ faces were. They could recall the cusp of his hand, and it was almost as if it was there again, in a dim light, ultimately fading because now every piece had returned, and he could leave with the knowledge that his parents were together again. He could rest, and he could be at peace, the way Sera was now after years of battling numerous demons. “And I am happy, I am the happiest when I’m with you, people come and go in my life, each carried a piece that shaped me into the person that I am today but all I know, despite our flaws, despite the nights we longed for each other, you have always been the one to bring me the greatest joy, and I’m utterly aware without a lone doubt in my mind that you are a wonderful parent to both Jungwoon and Jungsoon— Jungwoon grew up to be such a beautiful, lovely child, don’t you remember? He would always talk about you, what he would give to be someone like you,” their breath hitched at that, it was safe to say that it edged close into an emotional breakdown, but not necessarily in an agonizing manner, not at all. “You are a good role model and I know that our newborn will feel the same. They are both fortunate, to have you, and I am fortunate to have you and have loved you all this time.”
“And of course, of course I will have you — so long as you will have me. I have loved you, from the first time I laid eyes on you, and I will continue to love you through thick and thin. I will be here to support you while you reach for your dreams, and I will be here as we share our most wonderful seconds together. I have written songs about you — and you know I will continue to do so. There are not enough words to describe what you do, and how you are, and so I will write and sing them until we both breathe out our last breaths. I love you.” And so, they return the gesture, although their fingers shake, and so were their lips. “You and me, always.”
Will you take this person to be your wedded spouse?
They had to tear their eyes so they could fully take in the officiant’s words, but their voice was as definite as ever. “I will. I always will, without even a doubt.”
And with that, with adoration and certainty, they continued.“I, Sera Graves-Seong, take you, Duck-Young, to be my spouse, my forever friend, confidant, and my love. I vow to honor and respect you always, and I will give you my love freely and unconditionally. I pledge this to you with all of my heart, for all the days of our lives.” Raising their dainty hand, it took everything in their power to not shatter as the ring was slid into their finger.
You may now kiss your spouse.
Leaning down just a bit, they blissfully met his lips, tears unabashedly wettening their features. When they pull apart a smidge, they whispered.
“I love you. I’ll love you forever.”
sleepiingchaos:
Where: Peppy parrot’s pizza parlour
There were very few things Syd could wait on but this wasn’t one of them. Patience had never been his strongest suit, which was why he was on the verge of screaming right now. He had gotten off his shift not too long ago and was now stuck at the pizza joint waiting in line at ass o’clock in the morning for a slice. After spending hours on his feet serving the local drunks at the Sisters, the last thing he wanted to do was cook dinner for himself. Fuck! He missed having food on the table when he returned home. “C’mon, I’m fucking starving!” Syd complained impatiently, more to himself than anyone else. However, it seemed he wasn’t the only one displeased with the long ass line when he heard someone comment on it too. “I know! Look at all these fuckers! It’s more crowded than the bar.” Syd waved his hand haphazardly at the people in front of him. “How long have you been waiting for?” @anchoragestarters
--
Having to maintain appearances in the past, Sera had lived nearly half of their life with the urgency to regulate their emotions—not necessarily into stoicity per se, but as someone who had been in the spotlight brighter than the one they were working at right now, there had been demands, images they had been required to present to the world so it could continue to adore them. That chiseld some kind of eerie patience, which, obviously, their fellow band member did not seem to possess at the moment. The former starlet was beginning to regret agreeing to come here, when they could have gone home right away and purchase something else for their spouse to munch on later. “Syd, stop acting like a child. You’re embarrassing me.” Though with their hearing aid, although they could now discern what he was saying—they could barely make out the others’ complaints. All that they could digest was buzzing, a lot of it. “Let’s just pick a different place. Are you in the mood for pastries?”
[ timeline: present day, barcelona. ]
It would be easy to lie and say it was the sprightly Barcelona air which made them this — amorous, and ceaselessly impassioned, and yet Sera knew better and it was merely them, the enthusiasm to rake in their honeymoon for the second time. There had not been a single day without a lecherous exchange ever since they arrived, however, it was also important to mention that love was indeed in the air and there was nothing that could halt their doting upon one another. Sera didn’t think it would just be a phase either, stacking responsibilities aside — when one to remarry with the same amount of fervor for the other, it only spoke of the sturdiness and their bond and it had only made Sera realize that there had never been anyone else than the spouse that was cradled in their embrace right now. They were joyful — that much was obvious, and it felt relieving to be able to admit that again after the bumps they had to endure. The pair had decided to leave their babe with their closest ones, and it was ensured they could have some time to spend with only the two alone. As eager as they were to return home and scoop the child again — this was equally as crucial, and an opportunity they could not forsake in order to further strengthen their bond. It was yet another sunny day, and the newlyweds had just concluded another afternoon coated in raw intimacy. Sera was still in the bed next to him, their pale flesh glistening beneath the sun’s warmth kisses, and their dark locks splayed over his chest. If they could remain in this position forever, they would, and that had been the plan at the beginning. Alas, there was still so much they needed — desired to explore, and time was thinning out.
“Mhm, that was amazing. You were amazing.” It wasn’t a mere flattery — those praises came from the heart, and they were something that the former starlet often ensured they would do, to let him know the positive impact that he had on her. Even the littlest, most menial brushes that he did, and it was not only to make him feel good, it was sincerity at its rawest which was a rare fragment for the one who had been shrouded in deceit in order to lure others. They laid their head on his chest, their thumb skidding over his nipples in an impish way, giggling as they did so as they were well-aware of how their spouse would respond. This was truly a moment of bliss, and they had half a heart to remain in silence, let the ecstasy blanket them. “Where do you want to go today? We’ve been quite — cooped up in this hotel. Thanks to you.” Grinning, she lifted their chin upwards, wanting to watch his lips. “Where to next, hunny bunny?”