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[sin74435]

I found it, I finally found my place of peace. It’s somewhere between 90 and 120 on the bike. Zipping in and out of traffic barely missing other vehicles. At that moment when my life is in the most danger my soul is at peace. Maybe I’m broken, but that’s my peace when I’m close to death. I guess “normal” people don’t flirt with death, but that’s my favorite relationship, the only one that’s ever given me everything I ever needed.

[sin74435]

Combat? Never bothered me, slept like a baby. Being dirty for days on end, sleeping on piles of rubble? Never bothered me. What bothered me is the peace in between, like an endless cavern threatening to swallow me whole. I spent my whole liege taught to kill, then kicked to the streets without even an addiction pill. Now, in the time of need I will stand up and fight against the hand of greed. Ladies and gentlemen, now more than ever we have a calling, in our generation a war to endeavor. Stand with Ukraine, not to fight the war but to fight for all our brothers and sisters across the globe alike. Do as I am done and submit your will to fight. If not then stay at home, have a plan, know where you will roam. But mark my words with this beginners a new world and many will be exterminated waiting to fit in. Join the call before it’s too late and earn you mark in the history books of fate

[sin74435]

It was a fucked up feeling to write my own will when I was 18, it’s even more strange to be 38 and write my own obituary. Just checking off that list

[sin74435]

Seems like so long ago we dug that bullet out on the side of the road in Iraq. Scars are memories

[sin74435]

Quitting time

So I was at work, a normal day, I worked as asset protection for a large company. This meant I came in with plain clothes and nobody really knew I worked there. I had a secret room where I could watch cameras and such. A few months before I had caught wind that the manager of this place was stealing so I began compiling evidence. About two weeks prior to this they hired a new asset protection manager who was considerably younger and had no experience in the field. Well on this particular day, she came into my office and started her sentence with “as long as you work for me you will”, and instantly my blood ran cold. She was still in training for her job, where did she get off? I was seasoned and had a very good record. She went on to say that I couldn’t look into the manager because that was “above my pay grade “. So I looked her in the eye and said, “that’s funny because I don’t work for you anymore.”. She looked shocked and asked if I was even going to give notice. To which I replied looking down at my nonexistent watch, “you’ve got 30 minutes.”, she was furious. She called security to have them escort me from the building which was laughable. On my way out I took my access badge and casually flipped it one the floor. As far as I know I’m not welcome there anymore, and the reason behind all this? Looking into someone who was corrupt.

[sin74435]

Who the fuck said that being drunk and alone on the holidays is wrong? Why can’t it be a moment to remember all those before us? Why can’t it be a moment when I rejoice in the memory of my brothers and sisters? A moment when I see the faces I’ll never see again? Why does it have to be wrong to be drunk and alone? Why can’t it be my healing? Why am I shunned? Shunned if I move on, shunned if I stand still. Mind your business and keep your comments to yourself. You’ll never know the atrocities these hands Han live committed, nor the horrors this mind has endured. Walk a lifetime in my shoes then tell me I’m wrong. Sleep a minute in my bed and tell me you’ve rested. The moments my mind is free are the moments when I disconnect from this world