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I’m finally starting to work on OCs again! Maybe I’ll post some stuff here about them in the future…
I often feel like many people don’t want true friendships. They want shallow, surface level interactions that only talk about their one hobby in a transactional manner, instead of a deeper and emotional relationship. It feels like they don’t care about the actual person behind it all…
Now I just lost my doctor and they’re refusing to refill my medication and are forcing me to go someplace else and refuse to help me. This day sucks…
I apologize for not interacting with people’s posts more. I do really want to. It’s just my PTSD issues that makes me feel afraid of being betrayed and hurt again… But I’m trying my best, so I hope I can do more soon!
Guess who got abandoned by their therapist!? Ha ha ha… First my dog passes away and now this… These last two weeks have been terrible…
Sometimes, I get extremely paranoid about how many people have blocked or broken mutuals with me. I don’t like hurting people, so I have this constant moral anxiety about how my actions affect others, even when online. I think it’s very easy to forget that there are real people behind the screens…
It’s crazy to me that someone can ruin a person’s life and drive them to suicide and not feel a shred of guilt or remorse. And they try to shirk responsibility and willingly abandon that person when they’re dying and do things to make things worse to fulfill their selfish desires. And that same person lied to and betrayed someone who viewed them as their best friend and loved them so much. All of evidence of their positive interactions and happy memories were mercilessly erased as “punishment” for the victim reaching out to someone else for help. Then that person hypocritically chastised the victim for not directly speaking to them about the issues, when they didn’t do that themselves. And then they used manipulative wording and went back on their promises as an excuse to abandon their former best friend to run away from the truth and real life consequences of what they’ve done when it became inconvenient. And right before they cut them off, they flaunted their new friend they replaced them with and purposefully treated and talked to them with the same manner they used to treat the victim like, knowing they could see it. And after it was all said and done, that person had the audacity to write wholesome fluffy fanfics about kind characters comforting reader inserts through self-harm and suicidal thoughts that had themes preaching about love and empathy…
This all happened to me… And I’m still dealing with the consequences of it, while that person who used and manipulated me who I cared about so much got away with no repercussions whatsoever… I developed PTSD and extreme trauma from it and lost everything for months. I wish I could stop thinking about it, but it haunts my brain every single day… The world is so unfair and people are so cruel.
Sorry I haven’t posted in a bit, I’ve just been feeling pretty down lately. I can’t help but be paranoid that people are afraid of me and I’ve driven everyone off… I struggle so much in my daily life, especially since I got diagnosed with PTSD, generalized anxiety, and chronic depression. I feel like I’m incapable of acting human and making friends. I just don’t understand why people hate me so much… I try my best to be kind and supportive, and that’s all anyone can do… So why do people still resent me? I’m scared I caused permanent damage to the community around me when I got bullied and manipulated to near suicide and self harm by people who I thought were my friends… I don’t know, I guess maybe it is just my late night anxiety and mood swings. I hope I feel better tomorrow…
Here's my review of Final Fantasy 5! After 75 hours, doing everything, and getting the platinum trophy, I feel confident to give my overall thoughts on the game. This is easily one of my favorites in the entire series, in my top five with 6, 9, and 10! This is probably the most underrated entry that I've played thus far. It really deserves more love and attention, and most fans just ignore it. Despite its rocky North American release history, I feel like some are starting to come around to it, and I couldn't be happier!
5 is probably the most important game in the series gameplay wise. Its perfected job system can be seen in games today such as other Final Fantasies, Octopath Traveler, Persona, and Bravely Default. The ability to customize many job commands at once is truly revolutionary and remains fun even today, offering more replay value than most other games in the series. The fact that is also rewards maxing out all the jobs itself is awesome, being like a big sandbox for you to play in.
All of this is not mentioning the truly underrated part of the game: Its story and characters. A lot of its detractors and people who haven't actually played it like to tell this misconception that 5's story is bad and that it barely has any stakes or meaning. And that couldn't be further from the truth! The plot beats and character growth is more subtle and not as in-your-face as the rest of the series. The journey is more personal and focused on the individual characters and their dynamics. If you really take a look at what actually happens and why, you'll see that there's quite a bit of depth to the story, characters, and worldbuilding. Another misconception I often here is that just because it starts off more lighthearted and humorous means it's not as good, which I never understood. In fact, it gets darker and more complex the longer it goes on. I'd say it's more slow burn, rather than shallow. And on a related note, the environmental storytelling is the best in the series here, in my opinion. Seeing locations change in reaction to the story, which in turn affects the gameplay is genuinely great to see. Things such as the land dying or locations/enemies disappearing really add to the atmosphere and immersion.
The characters themselves are the real standout, though. Each of them have their own unique traits and personalities. They grow together and form an endearing found family that has some of the best banter in the series. They feel real and are fun to watch, making you invested in their own stakes to the plot. Combine that with shocking plot reveals and quite emotional moments that are some of the best the games' have to offer, and you'll always remember these people and feel sad when it's all over. Genuinely good genderfluid representation, elderly, and young adults aren't common in games even today, and this game does them all well. These heroes are special, including the great supporting cast and a unique underrated villain who's a genuine threat and bounces off the protagonists effectively.
The visuals are simple yet charming, the pace is very good, and the OST is one of the best and most underrated of the series! All of these elements come together to make a game worthy of classic status and the pinnacle of the series both of its era and now. Overall, Final Fantasy 5 is a truly overlooked masterpiece that deserves more respect and credit for its contributions to the genre and its own impressive merits. I loved it and will continue to do so as time goes on. Who knows? I might even write fanfics for it, with it having so much potential for more stories. I can't wait to replay Final Fantasy 6, my favorite entry, and see how all the awesome quality of life updates enhance the experience. As usual, I'll document my thoughts as I go. Looking forward to it!
Finished Final Fantasy 5! Wow, that final battle and ending were both incredible! Definitely one of my favorites now. The surreal design of Exdeath’s first form was amazing and I love how it seamlessly transitions into the next phase. I think this might be the first ever instance of a two phase final battle, and it’s great. Him being consumed by the Void itself is fitting and I like how bizarre his last fight is. He looks like an amalgamation of all the banished monsters while still feeling like a giant tree made of them, very interesting. And him accepting defeat and death because it would be part of his overall plan is very clever and makes his defeat feel all the more satisfying. Since I maxed everything out, the fight itself wasn’t too hard, but still epic. The ending itself was emotional, memorable, and satisfying. I think it’s genius how the ending is determined by how many characters were knocked out at the end of the final battle, it’s very original. Luckily, everyone was okay for me, so I got the best ending! The part where all the heroes fly through the Void and use the crystal shards to restore the world and elemental crystals felt magical. The letter montage was a good way to show the epilogue. And Krile being the one to write it shows her character development and makes the most sense to me. Seeing the side characters one last time brought a smile to my face. And seeing where all the characters are a year after is a nice touch. I particularly like how Faris is still a pirate and rejects the name he was given at birth, really nice! I was pretty satisfied with everything overall. The last part where Krile monologues to Galuf’s grave is sweet. The Final Fantasy theme playing there is amazing. And the four new Warriors of Light heading off on a new adventure is a perfect last moment to close out the story. Krile being on a wind drake and the rest on Chocobos is cool. And I love the sweeping aerial shots over the end credits, makes it feel so cinematic and feels very adventurous. Also, the part after the credits where the total level progression and abilities learned for each character are displayed is nice, and I’m sure it would be good for future replays. Overall, a sweet and fulfilling ending that is one of my favorites in the series and makes me wish there was a sequel. Soon, I’ll post my overall review. Looking forward to it!
Why the hell did they update the font on YouTube!? It looks so squished and ugly now!
I really like how personal the pre final battle cutscene is. Exdeath wiping out their hometowns and all the people they know is really intense and shows how much of a threat he is. Combine that with his monstrous and surreal tree form makes his presence pretty memorable. The heroes being defeated when they get swallowed by the Void is thematically appropriate and I love how the Dawn Warriors play a part in reviving them and holding the Void back, being the best usage of this trope yet. Nice to see King Tycoon make an appearance as well. I’m excited to end this story now, even if I’m a little sad to see everyone go! Hopefully, I don’t struggle too much.
I like how we actually get to go to the place where you banish enemies. It’s really cool! And Gilgamesh’s last words were touching, love it. And I finally beat the last of the optional bosses and maxed out all the jobs on all characters. It was tough, but fun! Almost at the end, I’m going to miss these characters and their world…
Bahamut just killed himself with his own Mega Flare when it reflected off my characters. I laughed.
Got the last job! I like the idea of it, so I’m sure it’ll be fun to play as. I remember playing with Gogo in Final Fantasy 6, so it’s interesting to see the origins here.
Winning against a mime by literally doing nothing to prove you are worthy of the mime class is genius and got a big laugh out of me!