i hate you and your stupid ai bullshit
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i hate you and your stupid ai bullshit
my parents were talking about me being in bed a lot and I finally just said “I think you guys need to take into consideration that I do have diagnosed depression that affects me physically”
they went on a whole rant about how they obviously do understand and how I just need to get up because sitting around won’t make me feel better.
no fucking shit? When I said it affects me I mean I can’t get out of bed.
Goals today: walk a lot at the mall and lose some weight. Meal plan is a box combo for Raising Cane's or a chicken sandwich from somewhere else that's eat cuz I fuck myself over by eating Skittles for breakfast....
Finally leaving the house for the first time since the time when I went on a grocery run with my mom two months ago
I'm wearing a long, baggy shirt despite it being hot as hell outside to hide how fat I am, but I'm okay with wearing shorts that show my hairy legs that I haven't shaved in like years.... How hypocritical of me
It pisses me off that people use voice actors as a reason to 'headcanon' characters who are canonically genderless or non binary as male or female.
I shouldn't be so mad about it, but it reminds me of how people treat others even now. People having their identies being invalidating because they don't look or sound or act a certain way. Not to mention past harassment I've faced for not looking or acting a certain way, but that doesn't matter.
Trans men and trans masc who aren't on T or can't go on T. Trans women and trans fems who aren't or can't go on E. People desprately trying to figure out if this non binary person's 'agab' to see if they're girl non binary or boy non binary. Not to mention people ignoring or forgetting about intersex people, or those who aren't on the male, female, neutral spectrum. Ie: agender people, people who use xenogenders, etc.
It's upsetting. There's a media where I feel represented and seen. A media where everyone uses they/them, where everyone's identity are blatantly there, and is reinforced throughout the show, on the wiki, etc. but everytime I check comments on Pinterest, YouTube, Reddit, heck even on some posts here on tumblr I'm seeing people call them he/him or she/her, based on the voices or how they look.
I don't like it. I feel like fans are erasing me, even though it's not being done to me directly. I hate when people force fem or masc onto characters who aren't that. Non binary, agender, and those who don't fit gender rules or under any labels exist. We are here, and we see how you treat us.
I feel guilty for feeling this way because I know some languages don't have a way of referring to people in the gender neutral way. I feel so bad and it's not anyone's fault but mine.
Idk where am going with this. This issue has led to me blocking people just for gendering them wrong. I feel like a bad person.
i was wearing a dress today right and as it happens when you are curvy, some cleavage manages to show. sure whatever. fine until i come across my mother. she goes... " that bit," gesturing to my chest "looks bad, you have to wear something under that." oh fucking really? a bit of cleavage, MY NATURAL SKIN looks bad. for someone who started preaching having self-love and body positivity as soon as i became a teenager she is a big hypocrite. then again, she always has been. so the fuck what if my body exists? you can tell im curvy just by looking at me. trying to cover up doesn't change the fact to many i do have that "dream body" they'd like to fuck helplessly (i say dream body, because we all know its not about a dream person). i know how im seen, a small sheet of fabric doesn't change that, didn't seem to all the times ive been shown and told just what people would do to me if getting caught wasn't a consequence. but then of course, what would my dear mother know about that? it isn't like i let myself be perceived by any at all. but for so long it had been my soul and self i hid from view, guess now my physical existance shouldn't be perceived either. so, as i went on to cover up once more - all i thought was how being me could have been so much easier.
working on a boat miles from the shore stuck with 20+ cishet men and some clients are staring at me i might start fearing for my life /hj
and my coworkers even be asking me why i don’t swim, mf i’m not gonna out myself by going in w short and a shirt what if someone decides to drown me and leave me at sea lmao that’s a joke the crew’s got my back but like yk
Ik I'm traumatized because every time I see a video showing someone's parenting style, I ALWAYS view it as shitty parenting
The videos in question are the ones that don't give attention to the kid having the tantrum (Not ignoring them but yk not giving them a reaction) and shit and like. Idk. Shouldn't you show them that you care??? I used to just get locked in my room when I was breaking down as a kid and. Idk. I only screamed for attention. Hell, my whole life, I've only cried FOR ATTENTION– so. It's probably just me but agahh..
i wish i took those messages as a sign to leave him