Slowly-moving-on @slowly-moving-on - Tumblr Blog

Realizing his love was conditional is what keeps breaking me.

He never actually loved ME, just the idea of me. And when I stopped letting him and his dad walk all over me he cheated. All I ever wanted was for him to care enough to spend meaningful time with me outside of the bedroom, to care about me as a person not just as a thing to entertain and fuck. All I can do now is hope that the karma he deserves hits him like the TRUCK he deserves to be hit by for the suffering he has caused me.

A weird pill I'm having to swallow after leaving a toxic work environment to a healthy one is that prep IS work! I don't need to feel guilty for not immediately knowing how to do something. The planning process is part of the process. Working as a teacher I was never given prep time. At least, not enough, so I was constantly coming up with things on the fly and executing them immediately. Now though, I've been so conditioned that as soon as something is given to me I need to be either ready to implement it immediately OR I need to be able to ignore it for weeks until it's relevant and figure it out on the fly because I won't be given time to adequately know what I was given, prepare, and plan said activity on paid time. I wasn't allowed to get paid unless I was in the building and from the moment I stepped in the door to the moment I left at the end of the day I was in a classroom with kids or I was on lunch. There was RARELY dedicated preptime. So now, I don't know how to actually do work in a normal way! I get stressed like I'm missing or forgetting something. Feeling like I'm out of control when I'm really more in control now than I ever was before. I'm not sure how I feel about it. But I needed to vent. So here's to keeping the Tumblr alive by showing the algorithm I'm real so my archive of my teen years isn't wiped from the internet due to inactivity.

hypokeimena

can you imagine being 26 years old and in marketing and you want to settle down with a rich stupid man who’s crazy about you and you FIND a divorcee who hasn’t talked to his ex in over a decade and has a very forgiving custody arrangement that would easily enable boarding school and is willing to MARRY you after a SIX TO EIGHT WEEK SUMMER ROMANCE with NO PRENUP and then his brat kid comes back from summer camp and it turns out his ESTRANGED OTHER TWIN DAUGHTER came back from camp and they hijack your entire life and put a lizard on you and then your hot old man ditches you for his hot mess of an ex WHO DESIGNED… THE CUSTOM WEDDING DRESS YOU HAD ALREADY PAID FOR. truly. a roller coaster summer…. all that scheming WASTED

solassitudes

sometimes it’s better refrain from deep introspection and allow yourself to just be.

solassitudes

and by that I mean: I don’t have to sit with myself and overthink and analyze and rationalize every ounce of my being. I am not a case study I am a person. faults and all. like any other person. sometimes I have to look at my mistakes and avoid self flagellation. sigh and learn what I can and move on. remembering that I’m living, and this is part of the process. free myself of that inner critic. allow myself to be, and try again.

the-memedaddy

Meirl

mizules-deactivated20240615

I will never, ever turn my back on people who need me!

byjove

my head is hurting from this Facebook post does no one understand Hendrix played a distorted version of Star Spangled Banner to protest the Vietnam War and not as some act of great patriotism, it’s like the boomers who lived through this event rewrote the history and purpose of Woodstock to fit with their nationalism, the 1960s saw some of the worst acts of American imperialism and racism....these “hippies” were not just anti-establishment, they wanted civil rights and they wanted America to stop killing people in east Asia simply because they were a threat to American wealth

circa1974-deactivated20240207

not only was it distorted, he played his guitar in such a way that it sounded like bombs, missiles, and gunfire. the music wailed and screamed with anguish. it was meant to express the horrors of the vietnam war in the most raw way possible. take a listen, it’s really an amazing piece of art and should in no way be erased to further fascist rhetoric!

valalaraptor

Also, around the 2:33 mark, he plays the opening notes to Taps, a song typically reserved for funerals of dead soldiers and the like.

margoblack

raise a cup for all the posts you couldn't reblog because someone added something abysmally stupid and the op's deactivated

swordshapedleaves

Watching Jurassic Park and I have Opinions on this place as a zoo. Feeding the predators live prey?? There's other ways to provide enrichment! Also that enclosure is way too small for multiple large animals like that! Electric fences? Ha! Electric fences won't stop a fucking goat! Where's the zoo experts? Who designed these enclosures?? Were all zoos this shitty in the 90s???

swordshapedleaves

This t-rex is so happy to be tearing a car apart and pushing it over a cliff! She's got so much energy! She needs healthy outlets! Where the fuck is her enrichment team???

ruffboi-mags

#i love this post #both because it's funny and good #and because it gets right to the heart of the problem #jurassic park wasn't designed as a zoo #it was designed as a theme park #the amazing scientific advances? #the miracle of real live dinosaurs? #it meant nothing #the lives of the creatures themselves were nothing #just the means for a rich old white man to get even richer #hammond was never doing it for the children #the kindly old grandpa facade was a lie #he was a billionaire doing what billionaires do #and this is way too much rant for a post that made me laugh #but here we are

ok but these tags tho

luxlightly

This is actually a big part of the book! The fact that the people designing and working with the animals aren’t considering the inherently chaotic nature of living things, they overlook obvious and simple mistakes that cause huge problems. They just expect everything to “work” and be normal and don’t take into account the vast differences between the park and a zoo and between a place of entertainment and a place meant to properly house and care for animals. That’s why Malcom being a chaos theory scientist is so relevant.

In the book, Hammond is a much darker character, as well. Movie Hammond is misguided and sort of buying his own sales pitch about this place being so magical and that leads him to overlooking or ignoring the danger out of a sort of naivety. Book Hammond is just kind of an awful person. He rejects all advice and warnings from everyone even when the danger becomes very apparent to others. He wants to control every aspect of the park and it’s just not possible,especially since he also wants everything to be automated for ‘effiency’. He makes the classic mistake of thinking that containing animals is making sure there’s “no way they could possibly escape”, which anyone who works with animals knows is not possible to achieve, instead of “make it so the animals are contented and happy and don’t feel the need to try to escape”.

noping-out-deactivated20241117

This whole obsession with wheelchair users struggling on foot down the aisle at their wedding or across the stage for graduation is 100% powered by ableism.

noping-out-deactivated20241117

“The heartwarming story of how one woman worked for 8 months straight so she could escape the horror that is being in wheelchair for a few short minutes to struggle slowly and painfully down the aisle on her special day.”

feraladoration

“the horror that is being in a wheelchair” bitch it’s hella better than struggling slowly & painfully down the aisle ffs

noping-out-deactivated20241117

“Despite being permanently paralyzed, her one goal since her accident has been to walk across the stage for graduation. The whole crowd gave her a standing ovation and broke into tears when she dragged her paralyzed legs across the stage with the help of leg braces and a walker to collect her diploma, after which she immediately sat back down in her wheelchair, which she will use to move around for the rest of her life.”

How the hell is this an inspirational story? This person needs better goals. And a therapist.

smoldragonborn

They’re toxic in an even greater way because as a disabled person, I didn’t realise till I was reading this how much I had internalised that. I genuinely have had feelings of fear and shame about using a chair or a walker if I get married. And why? Because I’m constantly seeing “heartwarming” stories about disabled people who shed their mobility aids for that moment. Why the hell am I afraid of using them to get married? Anyone who marries me or attends the wedding will know I need them and love me regardless.

Bless this post for making me realise I’d internalised that shit.

These types of stories teach people, both abled and disabled, that using mobility aids, especially wheelchairs, is inferior.

margomoment

here are some beautiful brides in chairs with dresses they ROCK. I know a lot of disabled ppl with internalized ableism think they “won’t look good” if they use their chair, but here’s some literally gorgeous gals for ur consideration

(that last ones cute as fuck and i teared up at it)

noping-out-deactivated20241117

Who needs a bouquet when you can be a bouquet?

smoldragonborn

I made my addition to this post in June 2019. Its now January 2020 and I no longer feel guilty about the idea of going down the aisle one day with mobility aids.

God bless the disabled community, y'all saved me from some internalised bullshit

thegayemu

This post floated by a few months ago, and I remember something to effect of there’s a difference between recovery and refusal. That is, like, I have a friend that suffered an incomplete spinal cord injury. He can walk again now, and I don’t think I’ve seen him use his chair in a few years. When he walked at his graduation, it was to show off his recovery. That he wasn’t quite ready to go through a full day upright, but he could walk across a stage, unassisted, and soon he would be able to do that every day. There’s also a difference in someone like me choosing to not use a mobility aid. My mobility is intensely fluid, especially seasonally. So, I would plan a summer wedding. And while I love my cane it can also be the biggest pain in my ass, so I’d want to just go unassisted. But that’s normal for me, at least right now. I can walk without an aid during about half of the year. It’s reasonable to assume I can make it through one day without it. All of that is different than someone that is fully and permanently paralyzed, that will never walk again, dragging themselves along because they feel that’s somehow better. Overall though, my biggest takeaway is fuck the media. Because disabled people should be able to make whatever decision they want without the media turning it into this grand inspirational story.

noping-out-deactivated20241117

Disabled people should be able to make whatever decision they want without the media turning it into this grand inspirational story.

THIS.

bifinmediasres

Couldn’t pass up the opportunity to add my disabled joy to this post. Look at this love!

aprillikesthings

Taking the opportunity to add these photos of Jessica Kellgren-Fozard and her wife Claudia, from this twitter post. Jessica also has a youtube channel that’s primarily about disability and chronic illness and LGBT stuff (it’s amazing!)

haveyouhadenough

I would also like to personally share, Annika Victoria who ALSO has a youtube channel. This photo was taken from her instagram - she made her wedding dress dress herself, BY HAND. Her youtube channel is mostly DIY fashion and sewing tutorials. I love her so much, she’s so unapologetically herself and informative