motherfucking woman

@snixxxlopez

Santana Fucking Lopez Ain't nobody got time for long ass introductions when you could just be a normal person and get to know me yourself. But since I know we're in the age of optimal laziness, here's the slimmed down version. The name's Santana. I act and sing. Some people say I'm a bitch, I say I'm honest. And I've probably slept with your girlfriend, so there's that.

558 posts

acupnora‌:

The difference between the beds in Miami and my own bed is really making me considering ringing the hotel up to find out what kind of mattress that was, and whether or not it’d be worth treating myself to a new one. I don’t see how one bed can ruin another for you, but alas, the comfort has gone.

I stole the pillow. No shame.

itsjemmabitch‌:

SOOOOOOO my birthday is TOMORROW!!!! and just in case u forgot to get me a bday present, i accept drinks and kisses!!!!! xoxoxo jemma

Finally turned 12, huh?

acupnora‌:

Is that something you actually have or… is it just a scare tactic?

Guess you’ll have to find out..

↳ INSTAGRAM: @snixxxlo uploaded a new photo.

so like, i should move here, right?

↳ 4,103 LIKES, 109 COMMENTS

#instasan #acup: starter

mrworldwidemuses‌:

They’re a lot more year round than you’d think. There’s a school I walk by with an old couple who seems to go there once a month to hand out to kids after school. June it’s just only harder to avoid them, bigger crowds. I suppose it is summer vacation for bigots, too.

It’s gross.

#mrworldwidemuses

heavenlystjames‌:

Probably, yes. The ticket is yours if you want it.

I wants it.

#heavenlystjames

heavenlystjames‌:

My fellow musical theatre lovers! Guess who managed to get two tickets for “Come From Away” here in Miami on Wednesday night? This wonderful and talented woman right here! I´m looking for someone to enjoy this superb musical with me. First come, first serve!

I could be here for that... Guess I should go to more shows before I’m in one anyways.

#heavenlystjames

heavenlystjames‌:

Pretty sure they´re always there handing them out. Just give them a polite smile and a headshake and walk past. Then hope they slip on a banana peel and fall flat on their face.

Have I ever given a ‘polite smile’?

#heavenlystjames

serenasmythemd‌:

They’re just looking out for our collective souls, Lopez.

Joke’s on them, we ain’t got any.

#serenasmythemd

acuppajeanne‌:

If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you’ve met my extended family. The upside here is that pride month also brings out all the loud-mouthed gays ready to come at them all. Pick our fighter.

I mean, same. Maybe we’re related.

reaglane‌:

I can’t remember the last time I looked at a bible, or I ever really have, but the little ones are actually kind of cute? Even I took a look at one I got today at a crosswalk on my way to get lunch and then threw it in the nearest recycling bin.

A tiny book of lies is barely cute. Least you recycled it, tho.

acupnora‌:

It seems they’re definitely crawling out from every nook and cranny, though honestly, they tend to leave you be when you tell them you’ve already read the bible. I grew up with a lot of people like them.

I just keep offering to show them my sex tape. Usually shuts them up, too.

acupofmatt‌:

Don’t worry, I do the Lord’s work by using passages from their bible to contradict every homophobic and nasty thing they say. I’m so glad all my years of Sunday school, bible study, and being an altar server has finally paid off.

Wasn’t worried.

scxutshonor‌:

It totally does. You should start carrying ‘round some dollar store rainbow stickers to pass out when you’re met with those assholes. Just don’t like… smack one of those rainbow stickers onto your face. Apparently they can press charges. Not that I know that from first hand experience or anything.

I’ve never been into a dollar store, sounds dirty.

Is it just me or does pride month bring out all the assholes handing out tiny bibles??

↳ INSTAGRAM: @snixxxlo uploaded a new photo.

betcha wish you asked me to prom

↳ 4,103 LIKES, 109 COMMENTS

acupofmatt‌:

Definitely worth it. 100%

We’ll see.

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