They ain't cuddly like me

Samantha. Not really a firefly blog anymore but I'm too attached to the url to change it. Right now I'm trying to figure out adulthood and life in general. Idk what this blog is but here you are...

[kotaku]

The End, by Alister Lockhart.

[walkinchicken]

Bruh, if you don’t think that having historically significant events well documented from multiple perspectives is a good thing, then idk what the hell u doin.

[purplebloodedmajesty]

Besides, like, that is literally a Giant Monster Rampaging Through The Town. What the fuck is the everyday person gonna do other than Tweet/Instagram/Post about it going “It’s the apocalypse you guys! Eyyyy lmao #apocalypse #deathrising #nofilter”?

[nbkatara]

#like come on your cellphone may not defeat the beast#but it can gain you like 50000 followers before the skies start raining blood so#who’s the REAL winner here? (via @purplebloodedmajesty)

[songofsunset]

And heck, even if your own death is inevitable getting information out could help save other people, even if it can’t save you. ‘Here are 20 livestreams of the giant tentacle monster including how it moves and attacks, how can we beat it?’ is way more useful than ‘an entire city got wiped off the map and things smell vaguely of calimari idk man’

[steppsful]

reblogging for this perfection: ‘an entire city got wiped off the map and things smell vaguely of calimari idk man’ 

[safetytank]

Point #1 on this here article talks about Robert Landsburg, a photographer who realized he wouldn’t survive the eruption of Mt St. Helens (too close to outrun the ash cloud) and used his own body to shield & preserve the photos and recordings he’d been taking during the explosion

these surviving photographs are still CRAZY VALUABLE to this day for the rest of the volcanologist community, since actual recordings of an in-process eruption are so dang rare

on-site documentation of any major disaster is gonna be VITALLY IMPORTANT to the people who are tryna figure out how to prevent that shit

tl;dr have your phone out, make your death-by-kaiju worthwhile to the scientific community

[probablycthulhurpgideas]

I was just trying to get some coffee y'all

[perhapsarat]

oh shittt

[handsomedogs]

This is Prim! She is a 6 year old Chihuahua Poodle mix! -@jesslee4

[aroaceconfessions]

i'm not sure i'm asexual anymore, except i feel like i still am? i have a boyfriend and we love each other, and if he were to bring up sex i wouldn't mind too much as of right now. i'd probably be ok with it. although it changes from time to time, and sometimes i'm repulsed by the idea of doing that sort of thing. i suppose right now i'm settling with demigreysexual but i feel like that's too much. i feel like i'm asking for attention. maybe i'll just stick with asexual as a label.

Many ace people have and enjoy sex, it doesn’t have to change your sexual orientation.

[smallwelshmonastery-deactivated]

If someone tried proposing to me in public i would have them arrested

[commodorecliche]

pull the trigger, Cards Against Humanity.

[nobodybetterhavethisoneoriswear]

pull the trigger, Cards Against Humanity.

[opisthokontology]

PULL THE TRIGGER, CARDS AGAINST HUMANITY.

[childhoodruiner]

[rocktheholygrail]

[kittycheshirestuff]

[ericthelavender]

Everyone talks about how shitty and stupid customers are, why don’t we ever talk about the cool ones? 

-Bilingual children translating for their parents/grandparents like a boss

-The drunk guy you had to deny a sale to and he took it so well and maybe even thanked you for keeping him safe

-The random peeps in a long check out line who stop to tell you you’re doing an amazing job

-The regulars who have your back when someone starts giving you a hard time

-Customers who let you know to keep an eye on someone for shoplifting

-Bros who insist on cleaning up their own mess/spill

-The really upbeat/cheery mom/aunt type customer that just kind of brightens your day a bit

Feel free to add, you guys. You know who they are, let’s give them some love.

[thundercaya]

The ones who share a “yikes™” glance with you when someone is rude

[nossavyara]

The ones who send their friends in to come see you and brag about how their car salespeople are the best. The ones who actually understand that you’re human. The ones who are legit super happy and don’t try to make your job harder.

[asylphintheclouds-deactivated20]

-Little kids who say “excuse me” and “thank you” more than their parents do.

-Old ladies telling you they used to have a job like yours so they understand how hard you work.

-People who understand it’s not my fault that we’re simply out of the product they want both on the shelf and in the back and say “That’s all right!” instead of getting huffy or ranting to me about how terrible my store is.

[someterrifyingspacemonkeys]

-Customers that sass the rude ones since I can’t

-Customers that share their stories with you BUT still make sure you dont have to be doing other things (giving you a way out if you are uncomfortable or genuinely have other shit to be doing)

[humorblr]

Zach Quinto Was Busted for His Fake Starbucks Name

[pr1nceshawn]

So Much Bigger Than I Thought!

How Many Earths Would Fit Inside The Sun

If The Moon Was Replaced By Saturn

Prop Used For Close-Ups In The LOTR Movies

United States Compared To The Moon

Traffic Light

Road Signs

Michaelangelo’s David

Great Pyramid Of Giza Compared To A Human

Size Comparison: Titanic Vs. Modern Cruise Ship

Humpback Whale And Diver

Salt Water Crocodile

Giant African Land Snail

A Full Grown Wombat

Leatherback Sea Turtle

Eagle Talon Vs. Human Hand

Gorilla’s Hand

[sadcthulu]

Just a note - most traffic signs and red lights are NOT that size.

[be-your-luve]

Gina Rodriguez photographed by Corina Marie for TheWrap

[kisskissfuckshitup]

kids are fuckin wild dude,,,

i walked out of my apartment this morning and a five year old kid was playing outside and immediately he pointed at my aparment and was like “some chinese people used to live there. now someone else does”

and i was like… you mean that one? and pointed at my apartment, the one i literally just walked out of

and he was like “yeah”

and i was like……….. yeah…

[kisskissfuckshitup]

the other day I was coming back from work and as I’m walking up to my apartment, he runs up to me with two fistfuls of grass and yells DON’T STEP ON THIS GRASS IT’S FOR THE BUNNIES and drops it in the middle of the sidewalk and i’m just like okay!! :D

[kisskissfuckshitup]

this morning I left for work and I heard a tapping noise, so I looked up and he was in the second floor window waving goodbye

[kisskissfuckshitup]

today I was walking to my door and he ran up to me and yelled DID YOU KNOW SOMEONE IS COMING and i was like WHOA NO WHO’S COMING

and he tells the girl beside him YOU TELL HIM so she tells me “there’s a guide coming! and he’s invisible!” and ofc i’m like WHOA THAT’S SO COOL and the boy tells me that he’s arriving by helicopter. and the helicopter is also invisible and you can’t hear it either! so I ask why he’s coming and they tell me it’s because it’s his birthday and he’ll be here at exactly 6:00

they’re gonna ring my doorbell at 6 so I can tell the invisible man in the invisible helicopter happy birthday before he flies away

[kisskissfuckshitup]

so i said happy birthday to him and they showed me his invisible helicopter and then informed me that I misheard them and that the invisible man was, in fact, God

[kisskissfuckshitup]

okay so TODAY i came home from work and he came up to me and was like “i rang your doorbell earlier” and so I told him I wasn’t home and asked what he needed me for and he was like

“i had a question”

so I was like alright what was your question

and he goes “do you have a kitchen?” and I was like… uhh yeah I’ve got a kitchen

and he was like okay and walked away

[prokopetz]

I just got one of those door-to-door evangelists, and I’ve gotta admit I kind of feel sorry for them - their pitch is, like, hilariously ineffective because they just don’t seem to realise that most folks have no point of reference on what they’re selling. It’s like watching someone try to convince people that they should play Pokémon, except they’re operating under the unexamined assumption that everyone everywhere is already familiar with the basics and just can’t decide which generation is best, so they’re standing there banging on about the finer points of the type matchup grid to an audience whose knowledge of and interest in the franchise begins and ends with “the monster goes in the ball”.

[feynites]

I once completely stumped an evangelist when I was a kid because he asked me if I knew who Jesus was, and I said ‘no’.

“No?” the poor dude repeated, looking dubiously at his companion.

Me being myself, I immediately doubled-down.

“No,” I repeated. “Who’s Jesus?”

This summoned up a long silence, followed by the evangelists asking to speak to my mother or father.

“They’re not here,” I said. Technically also a lie, but my father was sleeping from working nights, and I wasn’t going to wake him up for this.

“Well… um… so Jesus… Jesus Christ? Our Lord and Saviour, Who is the Son of God?” the chatty evangelist tried, looking at me like I was some kind of alien puzzle.

“You mean Hercules?” I responded, for some reason. I still don’t know why.

Another long silence. We were clearly off-script. The chatty evangelist started trying to go through the ‘died for your sins’ spiel, and for some reason, all I could think to do was roll with the angle that I was legitimately unfamiliar with even the concept of Jesus, and had somehow reached the age of nine or ten with only a thorough education on Greek Mythology to serve me in a religious context.

I think the second guy was well aware that I was full of shit, because he kept covering his mouth like he was going to laugh, but the first guy was just caught somewhere between horror and a weird kind of excitement. Like he’d been waiting to finally meet someone who didn’t know ANYTHING about Jesus, just so he could be the first to explain the whole Christianity deal.

Anyways long story short I ended up just trying to tell them all about the Trials of Hercules, like we were just exchanging fun facts we knew about demigods, while the first guy was just adamantly trying to be like ‘no that stuff is made up, but the Jesus stuff is true’, until his friend finally was just like ‘thank you have a good day’ and closed the door and made him leave.

[the-neon-pineapple]

i saw a couple once, clocked ‘em immediately, and said “what’re you boys selling?”

and they set me up for the punchline so obligingly: “oh, we’re not selling anything, ma’am, we’re from the church of—-”

“ah, selling jesus, i gotcha”

their faces. bless their hearts. same deal, one was pure jesus stan 100% of the time, one kept tryna avoid cracking up.

i think it’s Mandatory they send one with a sense of humor and one with a stick up his ass. like a weird evangelical buddy cop set up.

[sdkdoesstuff]

“But it’ll confuse the children!”

So does math, but you still educate them on the matter so they’re knowledgeable about it for the future.

[keybladesoras]

Incredibles/Incredibles 2

[glittersinnertoons]

Holy fuck she knew

[marauders4evr]

Wait…wait a minute, wait a minute, I just realized something!!!

What if she did know?

Think about it, Helen goes in to talk to Edna but Edna has already prepared a series of supersuits that are perfectly designed for every situation she and the kids are going to be in. And for some reason, we’ve all just accepted that, yeah, she’s Edna Mode, she would know these things, she’s just like that.

But what if we’ve all been missing something right in front of us?

We know Edna has affiliations with the government agency and has obviously been making suits for decades. Do you think the government is just going to get a random fashion designer to make these suits? Absolutely not.

They’re going to get a Super.

What if Edna is a Super with the power of future-vision? 

That’s how she knows exactly what suit to make, that’s how she knows that the kids are going to be in danger, that’s how she’s so aware of everything going on around her and catches everyone off guard.

She never looks back; she looks forward.

(Sorry for hijacking your post, OP.)

[kairaloi-and-more-deactivated20]

which is why the whole cape thing hit so hard. she didnt see it coming

[starrose17]

I love the idea of a Super whose power is to amazingly see into the future and she just uses it for fashion design.