Sometimes Alive

I'm lost somewhere in the world between relapse and recovery, constantly opening doors just to find exactly what I fear on the other side of the frame.

[childmagazine]

[literallysame]

[g-ayyee]

Date someone who will

wake up at 4am just to listen to you talk about a bad dream you just had

tease you for little things just to apologize six million times when you act upset

be nervous to kiss you for the first time because they don’t want to fuck up 

touch your butt 

offer to buy you a book that you absolutely love, and insist when you tell them no

watch your favorite movies with you even if they don’t like them

let you give them too much information and just listen to you talk for hours 

stay up until you fall asleep just because they want to talk to you

share your love for dogs

talk about animals with you for hours 

make you laugh even if it’s 2:30am and you’re laying in bed crying because you sat there and over thought

reassure you that they care and will always be there for you

tell you that they think you’re cute when you get angry at a video game 

laugh with you 

claim to not know what you’re talking about just so they can watch as you struggle to explain it just to tell you they already know and just think you’re adorable 

Most importantly, date someone who makes you happy. 

[wnq-writers]

Sometimes I look, But I don’t know who I see. This reflection in the mirror Is not who I used to be.

Renan T (via wnq-writers)

[sometimesanna]

My spot

It took my nearly 20 minutes to hike to this spot- and I'm fairly certain that, as a child, it took 5. I'll attribute it to the dark and the slippery wet rock and the overgrown bushes that no child has carefully pushed aside day after day to make a path. I have not been here since I was 9 years old. It is calm and quiet and wet and smells like leaves and honeysuckle. I can still see the splatters of paint from the Fourth of July that I took a case of paintballs from Cory and Ryan and smashed them on the surface of the rock. I was hoping this place would soothe me. I graduate tomorrow. I'm graduating and yet I've accomplished nothing. I am not fully recovered. I am not fully fit and healthy. I am not talented in a sport or a member of a team. I am no girls best friend. I am no parents dream. I feel useless. I'm shaking as I type this. I haven't eaten much lately. I'm going to try and get better next week while I'm on a cruise. I think I can. I hope. I want to lay here and fall asleep. Maybe I will. I want to miss graduation- stop time. Let myself live the most beautiful moments of the past seven months over and over and over. Because he's going in the army. And I'm going to college. And soon- nothing will be as it is in this moment. I am afraid. I am sad. I am tired. I thought I would be excited.

[wnq-writers]

Your words hit me so hard, I’ve been bleeding ever since you spoke.

fullofangstfullofangst  (via wnq-writers)

[wnq-writers]

You told me you would love me despite my demons and help me defeat them. But in the end, you couldn’t even bring yourself to look them in the eye. Maybe now you understand why I tried to drown them.

puddlezerg (via wnq-writers)

[sometimesanna]

It seems like the appropriate time to remind myself that even the most beautiful flowers die if they're mishandled.

[wnq-writers]

You are fragile. You are capable of being broken. We all are. Stop acting as if everything’s fine. Cry. Scream. Let it all out. But don’t hurt yourself. Hurting yourself because you’re broken will make the situation worse. Speak out to someone. Seek for help. That doesn’t make you look weak. Having someone who listens to you will actually make you feel lighter. It’s as if they’re your umbrella amidst the storm; your pillar of strength. If it seems like no one’s on your side, you are definitely wrong. You are not alone. So go and start picking up the fragments and fix yourself.

juanlucio (via wnq-writers)

[wnq-writers]

You felt like the end of the world and I stood still in the face of your fury. I was burned up and turned to ash in your maddness. I was lost in your rage.

solitary-sister (via wnq-writers)

[wnq-writers]

From the moment you are born you will have an impact on this world. Seven pounds of pure innocence wrapped up in a blanket, and you will have them wrapped around your fingers. They will feed you, nourish you, help you grow. They will teach you how to chew, swallow, and even help you rid the waste from your body. And every time they make you eat that mushy green stuff you don’t like, it’s for your own good. When you turn 8 they will take you to the doctor for your annual check up. They will place you on the scale and write numbers down in their folders. When you get home, you will have a whole new meal plan. There will be a schedule of when you can eat, you will be told what to eat, and you will be told how much of it you can eat. And every time they make you put back that extra cookie you wanted for dessert, it’s for your own good. When you turn 16 you will decide that you want to lose weight. You will skip meals, count calories, and drown yourself in water. You will drink energy drinks to make it through the day, and walk laps around the halls of your bully-ridden school during lunch period as a sad excuse for exercise and motivation. And every time they make you feel like shit, it’s for your own good. When you turn 24 you will decide you want to look the best you can. You will eat better while still eating what you want, you will do yoga, and you will drink the recommended amount of water. You will sleep better because of that and the wonderful people in your life, but not because you’ve beaten yours demons. And every time they make you hate yourself, it’s for your own good. From the moment you are born you will have an impact on this world. Unfortunately, it will most likely have a bigger impact on you. And every time you celebrate another year, it’s at your own demise.

Sarah Marie Pardy, For Your Own Good (via wnq-writers)

[pureblyss]

Don’t live the same year 75 times and call it a life.

Robin Sharma (via pureblyss)

[drunkvanity-deactivated20161113]

I’m here for girls that are all fucked up inside. I am here for girls who drink too much, and do drugs to mask the pain. I’m here for girls who are promiscuous to fill the void. I’m here for girls with “daddy issues”. I’m here for girls whose bodies have been beaten and violated. I’m here for girls who are so depressed they can’t clean their house or themselves properly. I’m here for girls who are drop-outs. I’m here for mentally ill girls. Disabled girls. Sick girls. I’m here for every damn girl that doesn’t feel like life is worth living. even though we’re fucked up we’re still valid and important as fuck ok

[wnq-writers]

When your lover asks you why you’re so closed tell them about the book that you keep in your chest and how so many people ripped chapters out of you that you are now afraid that your spine might shatter if you move to the next page

the-whiskey-writer (via wnq-writers)

[wnq-writers]

I don`t want you to love the impression of me. I want you to love all of me. My good sides, and, indeed, the dark ones too. I want you to give me space for my dark day, and to love me even more because I am ordinary in many aspects. Are you strong enough to do that?

vicrosea (via wnq-writers)

[wnq-writers]

Happiness comes in waves. So I hope and I wonder, will it ever drown me?

xuxnxkxnxoxwxnx, Awaiting the Flood (via wnq-writers)

[para-quedas-blog]

[beexgood]

I often romanticize about these types of train rides.

[nightswimrning]

I want to look at this for forever

[naturechosen]

Free Your Spirit 

[spiritualsun]

good vibes here