remember when himaruya was like “israel/palestine are not going to show up in this bc I want to keep it light hearted” as if he hadn’t totally made light of the shoah & japanese war crimes
Alright. I’ve waited a bit to respond to the open letter in an Official Capacity mainly because I figured time would suss out some of the odd conspiracy theories around what ulterior motives I might have for coming out about this would be — or the motives of some of my friends for drawing atten...
Alright.
I’ve waited a bit to respond to the open letter in an Official Capacity mainly because I figured time would suss out some of the odd conspiracy theories around what ulterior motives I might have for coming out about this would be — or the motives of some of my friends for drawing attention to it/helping me. Also I had midterms and other real life problems -- now that my deadlines are cleared (for now) and I have readings to ignore, here’s a Google doc. I think this is probably the last time I’ll be addressing this situation publicly, for better or for worse.
TW: anti-blackness and anti-Indigenous racism, Islamophobia, abusive language, gaslighting.
Posting on a burner acct mainly because I’ve survived tumblr death threats/doxxing before and don’t want to deal with it again. I’ve been contemplating coming forward about this for a while — it’s been three and a half years since this transpired. In the historical APH fandom in particular, we are especially prone to thinking we are different from the “fashy” fans who don’t have a problem with Nazi Germany being a character in the show, with its casual dismissal of colonial and genocidal history, and its erasure of the Shoah and the war crimes of imperial Japan (amongst scores of other things). Those of us who enjoy playing with the premise and focusing on a more faithful depiction of history seem to think we are exempt from recreating those same oppressive structures in our own work, in our own fandom groups and relationships. This is absolutely not the case.
Most of this took place approx. January through May 2017. I was freshly 21 at the time and the people responsible were ~19-20; I recognize that people change, and make mistakes, and grow, especially at that age. But I can also safely say at 19 I was not doing or saying these kinds of things to people, and that if I did and have forgotten, I believe I should be held responsible for those things. That being said, I also believe that these events must be brought to light.
I joined historical hetalia collective in the late summer of 2016 at its founding. At the time, I did not emphasize my Métis identity because, as someone who is also Italian and has a strong interest in Italian history, it was not the focus of why I wanted to join and what I wanted to discuss. I was very excited to talk with other creators in what I assumed was an anti-racist, canon-critical setting. Lyz, then “yelyzavetaart” on tumblr, along with one other person was a founder. I was the first person appointed as a moderator, eventually joined on the moderator team of about five people, including Alex stirringwinds and a white Ukrainian-American person who went by “ilaaer”.
It was around winter 2016 that a user named Baguette (at the time petitebaguette on tumblr) joined. Baguette very quickly began saying incredibly racist things in the server; most did not address it. Baguette maintained that reverse racism was real, that white women were targeted specifically for sexual violence by men of color, & that Europe does not owe reparations to First Nations and other Indigenous people, amongst other things.
When I voiced discomfort — pointing out that as an Indigenous person, much of her racism was pointed at people like myself in particular and not necessarily at the non-Black, non-Indigenous others to the same extent— people on the mod team were quick to tell me that I was being out of line and aggressive in my approach. When I advocated for her to be banned, others on the team were quick to give her another warning, another chance, instead. This resulted in an incredibly hostile environment; instead of a racist European being told to examine her bigotry, the group decided it was more important to tell me to watch my tone.
I truly began to question my own experience and all of my relationships on the server. All of these people who I loved to speak to about history and things I cared about did not actually care about my well being, let alone that of others experiencing similar things. I was not more important than the collective’s optics; standing in solidarity with Native people was less important than any bridges that might be burned in doing so. I was concerned about the effect that such rhetoric going unchallenged would have on younger members; I did not like what kind of conclusions were being encouraged.
It culminated when Baguette posted about the “preferential” treatment Muslims got from the French government over Christians, a major Islamophobic dogwhistle. As someone who has also lived in France I decided to challenge her on her beliefs. When she reacted poorly, I was blamed, stripped of my moderator title, and effectively banned as well.
Upon telling me I was being removed, Lyz said something to the effect of me being “hostile” towards a person who said genocide, as a European, was not her problem, and that members in the collective should not be “caught in the crossfire” of our dispute. I would argue that being on the receiving end of a racist tirade is not a “personal dispute” -- the team absolutely failed to address the problem and then also blamed the person who was being targeted.
While I commend Lyz for trying to be diplomatic at the time, Lyz had zero problem banning an openly homophobic European (by the name of Nessai) a few months prior. Somehow, when the question of Native people came up, Lyz — and the other non-Natives on the administrative “board” — could not summon that same conviction. Somehow, a Native person could not be given that same empathetic treatment. Baguette’s racism was condemned in private, sure, but decisive anti racist action was far too “radical”. I should not have to elaborate on how and why this is racist.
In short, tumblr user petitebaguette (now sartreslemonade) was a virulent racist. Users Alex stirringwinds, Lyz neviart, ilaaer, and many others were not only complicit, but enabled that behavior by systematically gaslighting and then deplatforming the one Native person on the moderator team who demanded she be removed for her actions. All of them should be held responsible, and creators of color (especially Black and Indigenous creators) in the APH fandom should be aware of this.
I have included screenshots of some of these conversations below — I sincerely invite others to make the judgment themselves. I know of at least one other Native person who had similar problems in this same collective, not long after I left. I do not know if there are others — I know people can and do change. I hope that by the time this is posted, all those mentioned can and are doing better by Native and Black people. I hope that my story does not repeat itself in other mouths with the same cast of people. I have included what I have been able to recover/keep over the years: my letter of dismissal from Lyz, some of the things Baguette was saying, the interaction between myself and Baguette when talking about anti-indigenous racism in France, and Alex’s response to that conversation.
Lyz’s letter:
Some examples of the things Baguette was saying:
Interaction between myself and her about reparations for Native people:
