We should tell children more about why we do things other than how to do things
While teaching kids practical lessons is essential for their growth—it's not debatable—we also need to start telling children on the reasons why we need to do things, especially the societal norms.
Earlier while I was teaching one of our juniors in our lector ministry in our church, I have realized a crucial thing that even we missed in our childhood. The understanding of why society operates how it is, why we need to do certain things, and why we should even do it in the first place.
The kid I was teaching was no more than 11 years old, not really a newcomer in our small ministry, but still a fledgling nevertheless. Since yesterday, she has been struggling to read out her assigned readings for the mass. I was confused since our coordinator had already been in this role for more than 20 years and had handled at least 4 generations of children to teach how to proclaim the word of God. It wasn't new that there will be times when there is a need for overtime because one child hasn't been able to get the right read for their assignment over and over again, I have been there. After all, aside from being human, children will be prone to mistakes as they don't even know it's a mistake to begin with. However, there was something about her mistakes that didn't sit right with me. She has been taught many times how to read it, and how to do it, but no matter how much repetition it takes, she can't really get the right read. Of course, every child, every single person will have different paces of learning, but I surmised it wasn't the problem.
I confirmed it when I got to teach her instead earlier before the mass. She still had the same mistakes, stuttering, adding words that aren't even in the scripture, and overall unsure of what she was even doing despite spending countless minutes trying to get it right yesterday. So, I told her why we are doing this. Why our roles were to read the scriptures. I told her why the first reading needs to be as if you are telling the story. I told her the power of storytelling and how to properly convey and illicit images in one's mind through words and why we do it.
After a few examples, I saw an improvement in her way of reading. When I told her why we needed to read it as if we are reading a storybook, she started to read it like it was a storybook. Her speed in speaking slowed as if she was making every sensory word impact the audience she would have later. Then I told her how to read the psalm and why we read it slowly and rhythmically. As soon as she knew the reason because psalms were songs, she started to read it the intended way that would please our coordinator. When she knew why do we needed to do this, she understood now the how's we have been imparting to her.
I think it is just not with the practices that we are teaching children do we share the reason why we do it. A part of the spirituality of the sanctuary wasn't clear before, as those before us, and even me were unsure of the religion we would partake in. A part of the teenage mind is curiosity and defiance against what they perceive is being forced on them, and communication plays a big role in such parts. We have been focusing on the transfer of knowledge, especially the how's but not the why's.
That's why children ask. While most will ask "What is that?" which plays as them familiarizing the world, when they ask "Why?" it plays for their understanding of the world. While they familiarize (what) and practicalize (how), it's our obligation to lend them a hand in understanding these concepts. It will not just aid them in preparing their minds for the next chapter of their lives but will help them to learn and help them in their autonomy at an early age, initiative, and industry as they grow to late childhood. This will give them confidence when doing things, as they will find their will and purpose to prove their competence. Giving them the sight behind all of the learned things will have an impact on their mind that they will always bring when they grow up.