Heyo! I'm a small-town gal from MA turned writer in the big city, and then a smaller city. Other than that I’m a dreamer, dog lover, park lounger, hot guy checker-outer, food lover, occasional overeater, and proud ‘Cuse alum. This blog is quite necessary. You see, I’m sort of at a point where the sh*t is outweighing the sunshine. So this is how I'll purge my pent up frustration about my chronic foot and ankle pain and quest for a diagnosis (update: turned out to be Lyme disease!). It's also where I share my awesome Paleo recipes. Yep, I jumped on the eat-like-a-caveman bandwagon for it's anti-inflammatory benefits, and I'm a big fan. So here's the plan: as I tell you about my life, I'll pull at least one shred of positivity out of even the crappiest situations. Because I want to appreciate all the things that are going right, and leave you mildly entertained in the process. Thanks for reading! xoxo, Steph var _gaq = _gaq || []; _gaq.push(['_setAccount', 'UA-23792547-1']); _gaq.push(['_trackPageview']); (function() { var ga = document.createElement('script'); ga.type = 'text/javascript'; ga.async = true; ga.src = ('https:' == document.location.protocol ? 'https://ssl' : 'http://www') + '.google-analytics.com/ga.js'; var s = document.getElementsByTagName('script')[0]; s.parentNode.insertBefore(ga, s); })();
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Holy crap, this was delightful: Salmon burger with sautéed onions and spinach, and Asian style BBQ sauce. On the lovely #paleo "bread" I made earlier today.
Oh, Lyme. You're a fickle disease. Once I think I've shaken you for good, you surprise me with a physically-debilitating and emotionally-draining attack on my joints and tendons. What the hell, dude? Don't you know we're not friends? Not sure why you decided to show up again. Maybe I need to re-up my dose of antibiotics. But regardless, great job reminding me that you're not easily defeated and that this is going to be a long road to recovery. By the way, you suck.
Thought I'd lure you in with a food pic, then launch into a boring rant about my personal eating habits. But first, the salmon: Simply coat it with a mixture of Dijon mustard and maple syrup, sprinkle some crushed pistachios on top, and bake at 350 for about 20 minutes (or until flaky, time will vary depending on your oven). I ate it along with a baked sweet potato topped with organic butter, chili powder, and brown sugar--a pretty kick-ass flavor combo.
Anyway, that was my good-girl Paleo dinner. Trying to get back into eating this way at least part time. In case you don't remember (and why would you?), I did strict Paleo for about a year before I knew I had Lyme. It was my attempt at reducing inflammation and pain for my "mystery condition." But I slowly fell off the wagon last year....I was riding along, chewing on my grass fed beef jerky, scoping out buffalo on the prairie, then BAM! I hit a bump, only to fall out and end up with a triple decker turkey club in my mouth. Unfortunate accident, really.
I've found a pretty good balance at this point. I follow the Paleo principles of not eating processed crap with scary ingredients, but I've given myself a bit of leeway when it comes to grains (I'll allow myself a slice of sprouted grain bread once in a while) and legumes (seriously, there's no one who can convince me that peanut butter isn't healthy).
Anyway, that's all for now. Sorry for the several month hiatus. More on why that happened later (teaser: stupid boys), and updates on how I'm progressing with my Lyme disease treatment (teaser: It's going reaaaaally well!).
That's what I get for making coffee at 10pm. And instead of be super productive with work, I'm being super productive at Facebook and Googling my own name.
In an effort to not make this coffee-induced insomnia worth something, I'll post a brief life update:
Feet are doing well. Not perfect, but pretty damn good.
Work is going better than usual. And by better than usual, I mean it doesn't suck. I actually have high hopes.
In the past two weeks I've gone sailing, paddle boarding, jumping off bridges, raspberry picking, and waterfall chasing. Oh, and I got to pat a sheep and eat pancakes twice.
I'm happy, and a little bit distracted by it. Well, a lot distracted.
Obviously this is a condensed version of events--didn't get to mention any of my joyous NYC wheel chair adventures--but at least it's something. And hopefully it draws a bit of attention to just how difficult it is to get a damn diagnosis.
Call this morning at 6:30 a.m. Almost didn't pick up because it sounded like my pain-in-the-ass alarm. Bzz Bzz Bzz.
Me: "Hello?"
Overly caffeinated lady: "Hi! It's Dr. Wright's office reminding you of your appointment today at 7:15 a.m."
Under caffeinated me, thinking: What the hell...this dream is vivid...oh yeah, crap, dentist.
Same lady, less chipper: "So will we be seeing you?"
Me: "Of course! Can't wait, see you soon!" [click] Ugh.
Commence speed shower sh*t storm, during which I managed to overlook my entire right calf while speed shaving; then speed dressing from the growing closet on my floor; and finally, flat-out speeding to my appointment. Made it at 7:15 on the dot.
The real point of this story is that I'm annoyed. With myself. This is just the tip of the irresponsibility ice berg. I'm consistently late for dates, I watch too much damn internet TV while I should be reading important books, it took me 10 freakin months to finally get my PA license and register my car, I've been saying I'm going to start writing a book for the past two years and have only managed to scribble a vague outline that I can no longer locate, I don't practice my guitar nearly enough, and for the life of me, I can't bring myself to file reimbursement paperwork for my Lyme appointments. That's potentially free money on the line! I suppose I could be doing it right now, but I decided blogging for a readership of 10 was much more important.
This is not to say I'm totally hopeless. I'm actually quite good at updating my internet dating profile, discovering new and inventive ways to cook cauliflower, writing when no pressure or expectations are involved, volunteering with cuddly creatures, composing witty text messages, and making lists. Ok, so maybe I am a bit hopeless.
So tell me, am I a horrible adult? I just turned 26 and I don't feel a day older than 19. Does anyone ever feel like they have their sh*t together? My dad once told me he still feels like a kid and that his mom used to tell him the same. Which I guess is comforting, but also horrifying at the same time.
Anyway, I hope that by venting about my underachievements I've made you feel a little bit better about yourself on this Tuesday morning. I'm off to make another list. Hopefully I'll cross something off it this time.
So every week, I seem to be able to walk a bit farther. I can make it over 2 miles now. Woot! Take that Lyme disease induced foot pain. I've even been incorporating some jogging intervals and can usually last the length of about 10 telephone poles without my feet giving out. But last night something miraculous happened: My feet outlasted my lungs. Meaning, I finally got that out-of-breath feeling I've been longing for from my days as a runner. It was the first time in about 3 years that my feet could have kept going, but I had to stop because I was aerobically exhausted. I'm incredibly excited about this. I think it means (fingers crossed) that I can slowly start building my stamina and going for longer and longer "runs." I use quotes because, honestly, my attempt at running still looks somewhat pathetic. I'm pretty sure I go at the pace of a speed-walking grandma, but I'll take it.
In other news, I think my antibiotics are starting to make me incredibly itchy. It's like Newton's Law of Lyme or something: For every step forward, there's an equal and opposite surprise shit storm! Oh well, I'll take a little itchy for my new found mobility.
So I visited NYC last weekend. Here's a glimpse of what went down.
Bagels.
Pizza.
Heart A-Frigin-Tack.
Oh, and not pictured above are onion rings and red velvet fro-yo.
Needless to say, I went buckwild Why? Because I decided that starting tomorrow I'm going to do a Whole 30, which is basically a month straight of strict Paleo. Because let's face it, I need to prepare for this horrible thing called swimsuit season (I know, I just gagged too.). I've been doing pretty well with the diet other than what you just saw, but there have been some forbidden foods (a.k.a. jars and jars of peanut butter and "veggie" chips) creeping in. While they don't make me feel awful in terms of aggravating my ankle pain, they do have a somewhat negative effect, making me feel a bit cranky and groggy. I always feel more alert and happier on Paleo. Maybe it's a placebo effect, maybe not. But regardless, it's time to ditch the processed food blues.
Anywho, I'm going to try to stay accountable by giving more frequent updates. Not just about what I eat because, blah, that's boring. But I'll try to list some tasty recipes and fun tid bits about my day. And if there are none, I'll just write you a haiku about my latest online dating experience, which will probably go something like this...
Had a couple drinks
He didn't look much cuter
Time to fake a call
Back to my NYC trip for a quick sec: My feet rocked the sh*t out of that city! Honestly, I was a bit nervous to do a lot of walking, but they held up great. There were subway rides, frolicking around Central Park, walking to bars, and even standing for prolonged periods in said bars. I know! I almost feel like a normal person. And I got to see four of my favorite people: Stacey, Giselle, Ivy, and Heather! Holler, ladies. You rock my world.
Maybe I'll tell you more about my trip later. Maybe not. But right now it's time to hit the hay.
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