You've Become the Rain @stormbeforethe-calm-blog - Tumblr Blog

Couple of things: Got a new phone. So I'm gonna be making a new tumblr because this was the only way I could get on this account with that dumb email thing. So if you're actually interested in knowing my new tumblr just reply on this or send me a message and I'll be sure to follow you guys on the new one when I make it. Also, Ryan offered to come stay with me Tuesday night through Friday and I was really excited. Because I work Tuesday today and he was cool with waiting here for me while I worked. we got really slow and work today and I left super early so I could come spend time with him. I got back home, made us some breakfast, and then we were going to hang out all day today and tonight and have some drinks. But then his work called and even though he double checked with them that his shifts for today and tomorrow were covered, suddenly they werent. So I went from having all day today and tomorrow, to possibly at least having a few more hours with him todsy since he's an hour away from work, to having to immediately have him pack and go because they called him back and told him he didn't have a choice. And I'm so fucking sad about it. I wasn't intimate with him this morning because I was planning on kinda going all out tonight. And I'm not really sure the next time I'll see him. And I was going to tell him I love him. But, maybe this is the universe telling me it's not time yet. It's just the past two nights and mornings when we're laying in bed together, it's all I think about. I woke up early to get ready for work and I wanted to let him sleep, and I got to just kinda look at him for a few minutes. And I realized that I'm just so fond of him. I just want to be with him, and make him happy and I just care about him alot. He does so well at taking care of me and I just want to do the same for him. I'm just really sad that he had to go. Our time got cut so short so suddenly and I hate it.

amortizing

You can’t just sit there and put everybody’s lives ahead of yours and think that counts as love.

The Perks of Being a Wallflower (via amortizing)

amortizing

You can’t just sit there and put everybody’s lives ahead of yours and think that counts as love.

The Perks of Being a Wallflower (via amortizing)

glysunflower

I hope things work out between you and your boy. I know distance can be a pain but if you both really want it, then I'm sure y'all can make it work! :)

Thank you, I appreciate this.Distance/time apart has just never worked out well for me. The guys always ended up cheating on me, so it just makes me really nervous. I'm hoping it works out too.

I've gone from feeling super secure to feeling how I felt over a year ago.

#I don't know what to do #I don't know if this is my mind or not

dogecoin-verycurrency

agentumbls

it tap dog

blizzardbitch-schnee-archieve-d

@xylophil

#dogs

peachfacee

pls don’t stress over your body so much that you let it consume you. your body does so much for you and we’re all perfectly imperfect, and that’s what makes you special and unique.

if u were a gifted/talented child who grew into an anxious adult w fragile self worth and a perfectionist streak that makes u abandon things if ur not good at them immediately clap ur hands

He's trying to be so supportive and positive about it all. He's telling me not to worry about it, that he wouldn't have decided to date me if he couldn't handle us not being able to see each other all the time. He's telling me he really likes me, and that he'll want to see me just as much as he does now, and probably even more. He's telling me that if we don't get to see each other as often as we do now, it'll make seeing each other that much better when it does happen. He's saying "I understand" when I tell him situations like this have never ended well for me. "It's all going to be fine." And I want to believe him so bad. I believe that he genuinely feels that everything will be okay, and that this isn't a big deal, but I am so afraid that he's not going to get what he needs from me and he's going to stray. Or just leave. I'm just not ready for this to get all fucked up. I just started to realize how deep my feelings are getting and now I want to hold back on it even more. This makes me want to put up an even bigger wall because I'm so fucking scared. I don't want to be hurt like that again.

Lol I should have fucking known something was gonna fuck up soon. He's covering someone at work next week, which is why he can't come next week either, and he might be getting a new job soon. He has an interview on Tuesday. It's a better paying job, but it's also a job that probably won't allow him to have Mondays off anymore. And I'm not sure if it's a Monday-Friday thing either. So. We might be fucking screwed and it's going to get really hard to see him and I'm freaking out. Literally freaking the fuck out. I'm nervous for how it'll affect our relationship. Of course I get something good and shit hits the fan lol

Looks like I'm going to go two weeks without seeing him now and I'm really fucking disappointed and starting to worry he's avoiding me.

Lol what the fuck.

Hahahahah oh my God so basically I had to search for tickets for the pit for Green Day, and I ended up using the same site I did for Halsey but I wanted actual tickets this time instead of having it on my phone because it was kind of a pain in the ass. So after two tickets, and the service fee, and shipping.. $430 later Hahahahaha. That's like $100 more than I was expecting I'm BROKE. But I want to see Green Day too at some point in my life, it was one of the few bands I never got to see when I went to concerts all the time. This dude better put a fucking ring on it. Just kidding. I wanted to do this for him, I just hope he's excited and not upset at me for buying them. I have a feeling his reaction is going to be more of him feeling guilty instead of him being excited and that makes me sad 😔

itsborderlinebitch

note to self

- stop checking who’s watching your story compulsively, or at all - stop checking if theyve read your message - stop deleting posts and pictures when they dont get enough attention - who cares if they can hear your music blasting through your earphones, turn it up - stop comparing yourself to her. you are enough - stop apologizing for being sick - stop refreshing your notifications, my fingers are so sore - ignore the urge to conform to their expectations - stop talking, listen - do not let people tell you to calm down - stop trying to get them to want you , if they want you they will ask - stop making the same mistakes - stop feeling bad about thinking of his body against yours - stop refraining from appreciating yourself - stop explaining yourself - create. - you dont need people - stop feeling everything so damn much

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