Incorrect South Park Quotes

Where I post funny quotes about the kids of South Park

[stupidsouthparkquotes]

Creek - Crushes

Craig: Ugh, crushes are dumb.

Tweek: I know. Whenever I’m around the person I like, I just start acting stupid.

Craig: But you’re always acting stupid?

Tweek: …….

Tweek: Yeah, don’t think about that too hard.

[stupidsouthparkquotes]

Stan’s Gang - Baking Chaos

Cartman: We can bake these cookies at 400 degrees for 10 minutes or 4,000 degrees for 1 minute.

Kyle: No, that’s not how you make cookies.

Kenny: FLOOR IT!!!

Cartman: How about 4,000,000 degrees for one second ?!

Kyle: YOU’RE GONNA BURN THE HOUSE DOWN—

Cartman: I’M GONNA HARNESS THE POWER OF THE FUCKING SUN TO MAKE COOKIES!

Stan: DO IT!!!

Kyle: NO—-

[stupidsouthparkquotes]

Craig and Those Guys- Drinking

Jimmy: If you took a shot for every time you made a bad decision, how drunk would you be?

Token: Maybe a bit tipsy?

Clyde: Drunk

Tweek: Wasted

Craig: Dead.

[stupidsouthparkquotes]

Style- Holding Hands

Stan: Wow, Kyle, you want to hold my hand before marriage? How awfully lewd of you.

Kyle: Dude, we literally slept together yesterday.

Stan: That’s NOTHING compared to the lewdness of holding hands.

[stupidsouthparkquotes]

Bunny

Butters: Is something burning?

Kenny, leaning seductively on the counter: Just my desire for you

Butters: Kenny, the toaster is literally on fire.

[stupidsouthparkquotes]

Creek- Confessions

Craig: I’m in love with you

Tweek: We called off the prank war last night at midnight, dork.

Craig: I know

Tweek: Ah. Okay. Ack! Cool. Neat. Very cool ack! Cool. Cool. Coolcoolcool—

[stupidsouthparkquotes]

Style

Stan: This date is boring!

Kyle: This isn’t a date. I said I was going to the store.

Stan: Then why did you invite me?

Kyle: I didn’t, I specifically said “don’t come with me” then you said “fuck you Kyle, I’ll do whatever I want!”

[stupidsouthparkquotes]

Creek

Craig: Are you ready to commit?

Tweek: Like, a crime or relationship?

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Style

Stan: Kyle and I have the kind of easy chemistry where we finish each other’s——

Kyle: Sentences

Stan: Don’t interrupt me, Kyle

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Slushies - Creek

Token: Why are your tongues purple?

Craig: We had slushies, I had a blue one.

Tweek: I had a red one.

Token: oh…

Token:

Token: OH

Clyde:

Clyde: You drank each other’s slushies?

[stupidsouthparkquotes]

Stan’s Gang

Stan: Is stabbing someone immoral?

Kenny: Not if they consent to it.

Cartman: Depends on who you’re stabbing.

Kyle: YES?!??!!

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Craig and Those Guys

Token: There are seven chairs and ten kids. What do you do?

Tweek: Have everyone stand.

Jimmy: B-B-Bring three more chairs!

Clyde: The most important ones can sit down.

Craig: Kill three

[stupidsouthparkquotes]

CREEK

*Craig and Tweek skipping stones at Stark’s Pond*

Tweek: It’s such a beautiful night huh, Craig?

Craig: *whispering* Take that you fucking lake.