Experimental Mice Stage Protest over Dissections
Researchers at the University of Sleepy Hollow were shocked to find that their test subjects for a new intelligence-enhancing drug had let themselves out of their cages and were marching in protest. The escaped laboratory mice held signs saying, “Formaldehyde is Cruel and Unusual” and “In Solidarity with our Fruit Fly Brothers.”
The mice had initially intended to march all the way to the student cafeterias and continue their protest there, but researcher Vivienne Frankenstein placed a few dozen rodent exercise wheels on the planned route. At press time, the protest had extended itself several hours past its original end time as the mice were marching within the exercise wheels. “It was quite a disappointing result really,” Frankenstein said. “We had hoped the mice with the newer drugs would have seen the futility of protesting inside of a hamster wheel.”
Our interview with Frankenstein was interrupted by a student intern saying that several escaped Drosophila were working together as a swarm to carry a DVD copy the 1986 movie The Fly.