“oh my god. i can’t believe you did this.” | beth x dan
♡ valentine’s day starters, fluff edition - still happiest of bdays puta @noshitshcrlock
Word Count: 588
Daniel had at least 45 of those small fake flickering candles from the dollar store all over the floor. He was mindlessly strumming his guitar at the center of all the fake candles, while he waited for Beth to come home from her trip out of town.
He chuckled at the memory of a phone call with Beth a few days prior, when she had asked him to pick her up from the airport today, and he said, “No, I’m busy. I’ll see you Monday night after work.”
He knew full well it was Valentine’s Day and he really felt horrible for making her ride a godforsaken Uber back home on that cute day, but he’d been planning this stupid event since he started being assaulted by red and pink in grocery stores.
“For fuck’s sake,” Dan muttered at the sight of one of the candles going dead for no reason.
A car pulled up in the driveway, and he crouched down to avoid being seen through the windows.
There was a clatter of a suitcase and heels coming up the steps, and the lock turned soon after. That was Dan’s cue to start playing.
As a joke, he started to play and sing the chorus of “Toxic”, and Beth began to laugh as soon as she saw and then heard him.
He held his hand out to keep her outside of this circles of fake candles, and he began to serenade her with Daniel Caesar’s “Get You”.
Beth whistled and clapped when he reached the end of it, and he gave an exaggerated bow in return.
“Oh my god. I can’t believe you did this,” Beth began, “I was convinced that I’d be spending this bloody stupid holiday alone.”
Dan shoved some fake candles out of the way with his socked feet and put the guitar down to get to Beth as quickly as possible.
He hugged her tightly and replied, “What? I am not that bad of a boyfriend... You wound me.” He frowned.
“Of course not, but how can I be mad if you have your boys or something this weekend?” She kissed him on the cheek in appreciation.
“Oh, I do, but I asked them if they’d be okay at home alone for the night. Charlie said that he’d take care of his brother, so apparently, it’s worth putting up with his teenage rebellion,” Dan chuckled.
“God, they’re growing up fast. I swear they were barely up to my hip yesterday,” Beth sighed.
“Okay, you make me sound ancient,” Dan groaned. “Can I show you something else?”
“Wait, hold on, there’s more?”
Daniel smiled in reply and tugged her into the kitchen. On the counter, there was a covered cake holder, and a vase full of red roses.
Beth gasped in response, “Holy shite, they’re beautiful, Daniel. I love it.” She kissed him on the cheek again as they approached the cake.
“Open it,” Dan insisted.
Beth looked at him suspiciously, but she opened it anyway.
She covered her mouth as she burst into laughter. She wiped away some tears as she wheezed, “‘Thanks for the sex’?”
She took a deep breath in before she continued, “Jesus, I think I’ve taken a wee piss.”
Dan laughed with her, “I baked this ugly thing myself because I couldn’t look at the person at the bakery and tell them to put that on a cake without wanting to die.”
“God, I love you, you stupid man,” Beth whispered while she tugged Dan closer for a kiss.
Nonsexual acts of Intimacy - Select from the following for my muse to respond to…
Still accepting!
Dan smiled as he looked up from his book.
Beth was beautiful with their wet hair trailing down their shoulders and chest. Their skin glowed against the numerous candles surrounding the bathtub. They were too engrossed in their book to notice that their fiance was staring at them.
He felt like the luckiest guy to share a quiet and intimate moment with the person of his dreams. High school Dan would’ve never guessed this is where he’d be today. He certainly hadn’t imagined marrying twice when he was sixteen.
Dan quietly put his book down next to the tub and submerged both of his hands into the water to massage Beth’s feet.
“Put more muscle in it Danny boy,” Beth teased while they glanced up from their book.
Dan tried to keep a straight face while he replied, “Yes ma’am” but failed miserably and broke into a loud laugh.
Beth shushed him but she was close to laughing along with him. “Lisette might be a heavy sleeper but c’mon!” she whispered.
He mouthed ‘Sorry, sorry’ before returning to the foot massage.
Beth continued to read until Dan lifted his foot up to their face. They almost let out a shriek before he put his foot against their mouth in a desperate attempt to prevent them from waking the baby.
Beth glared at his foot when he finally moved it away. “Fucking damn it, Daniel,” Beth huffed while they attempted to get the water off the wet pages of their book.
“Oops, sorry baby. I was just gonna say that it looks like a wrinkly old grandpa’s foot.” Dan switched to his grandpa impersonation, “Excuse me, would you mind checking for a toe fungus? It’s been miiiiighty itchy all week.”
Beth’s frown turned into a grin at his stupid joke. “Grandpa, did you just put your toe fungus on my mouth. That’s disgusting!”
“It’s not my dang fault that you’re easily scared!” Dan protested, still in his grandpa voice.
“Fuck off,” Beth laughed quietly while they flicked some water at Dan for good measure.
Dan didn’t break character as he loomed closer towards her for a kiss. “Now give grandpa a kiss.”
Beth would have been rolling in laughter by now, and instead, they were turning red from trying not to laugh aloud. They managed to compose themselves long enough to give Dan a kiss.
“I love you, you cheeky bastard,” she smiled at him.
