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Growing up I use to have a lot of negative feelings about being gay. When I was about 8 or 9 I use to cry myself to sleep because I started noticing that I looked at girls in different way than I normally did, I would tell myself, "I have one life, why would I waste it being like that?" I was absolutely terrified that I might actually be gay so I tried ignoring my feelings for girls as best I could. Around the end of my first year of middle school I got my first real crush on a girl, I was scared to tell anyone but after time I ended up telling my best friend Toter. He made me feel normal, he didn't judge me or anything and I will always be thankful for him being there for me when I needed him. After a while I slowly came out to more people, first i came out as bi till I realized I had no attraction to men whatsoever. I was happy. Even though I was happy deep down I was still ashamed of being gay, it felt like whenever I held a girl's hand in public there was a possibility that someone bigger and stronger than me would decide that they didn't want there to be two girls together and they would try attacking us. I loved girls but I hated how I felt because of it. Even now I sometimes feel ashamed of who I am but whenever I think of her I instantly feel better, I feel like I belong and that I have nothing to be ashamed of. She fills me with so much love and happiness. And if I had to relive all the self-hate and confusion again to be with her, I'd do it in a heart beat 💜💙💜💙

#This probably makes no sense #im so tired and its like hella hard to type correctly but i wanted to do this like now before i forgot to #rip #girls who like girls #lesbians #Im So In LoVe #@raven #💜💙