#@shmegged

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Because @enjoli-paige told me to post, god I love her 🥹☺️

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You ever feel so anxious, overwhelmed, sense of purpose lost, no idea what your doing and the moment any small thing happens, when you logically know it’s not a big deal, but you’re overstimulation just turns into pure anger which leads to be a “bitch”, “combative”, or “you need to work on it” and you then breakdown crying bc every since you were the ripe age of 9 you’ve taken on everyone else’s burdens which they left in you to rot. you try everyday since the age of 14 of constantly working on yourself, being aware of your stuff and the voice in your head that says “you aren’t doing enough” get reactivated because “you need to try” comes out of someones mouth not knowing how hard I have to try to just get through a day. But reality is if I wasn’t “trying” I wouldn’t have made it this long. I wouldn’t be here. My working on my shit is a 24 hour job; from the moment I wake up and go to bed. IM. FUCKING. TRYING.