TIMING: current LOCATION: the grocery store PARTIES: Daniel @danielabrams & Monica @maybemonica SUMMARY: Out on their respective grocery runs, Daniel and Monica get sucked into an alternate realm where they meet some new...friends. WARNINGS: none...
Despite how clumsily Monica seemed to float through life, she had always been pretty great and surviving on her own. After all, for a doppelganger who didn’t even remember how she first came into existence, who else was there to depend on besides herself? She’d done it for years in Wicked’s Rest, and she did it in Paris while at the academy. Now that she had a roommate though, it felt good to have someone to share the responsibilities with. Sometimes it felt good to get babied too, especially with a dependable real adult around like Luc.
But she had to make sure that she didn’t get too comfortable and pull her weight with chores, otherwise Luc might call her a terrible roommate and leave her forever and Monica would be crushed — partially because she’d miss getting to be a little lazy from time to time, and mostly because she’d miss her roomie. So she was happy to push her shopping cart around the busy grocery store on this Sunday morning, dodging and weaving past high-strung Karens and wandering children.
Monica checked the list on her phone. “Yogurt, yogurt, yogurt,” she repeated to herself as she approached the dairy section. After passing the million types of milks, she spotted the yogurt brand that she and Luc usually enjoyed. Monica hummed to herself as she reached for the container, but her gaze drifted over to a burst of yellow that caught her eye nearby. “Oh my gosh, minions!” She said as loudly as she deemed appropriate in a busy grocery store, eyes widening at the yogurt container that had images of some adorable minions on the front. “This is so cute! Isn’t this so cute?” It was a question for the universe, truly targeted at no one in particular, though she did meet the gaze of the man next to her.
—
Daniel was once again forced to go to the grocery store to buy some groceries. Daniel slipped between two people standing in his way in the grocery aisle, both people focused on their own annoying conversation rather than the other people in the store who just needed to buy groceries. He had a few things in his basket, but he needed just a few more items. But he knew his exact budget off the top of his head, exactly how much he could spend with his cash, because seasonal work did not exactly pay well in the dead of winter when most people didn’t really spend too much time outside hiking. Instead he had to scrounge up money that he saved from the summer months. And the random money he got from the odd jobs he worked around town.
He made his way over to the dairy aisle, dodging two kids who ran out in front of him. He grabbed a carton of milk and looked down at his basket to figure out what else he needed. Maybe some yogurt, depending upon the price. He could maybe afford a couple more things outside of his budget. He went over to the yogurt section and glanced at the price tags, focused only on how much each item cost rather than the brand. He spotted the cheapest yogurt which had some weird yellow cartoon guys on it, and he shoved the yogurt into his basket.
A loud excited voice caught his attention, and he glanced over towards the young woman standing next to him. She looked at the containers of yogurt that he just grabbed, and he raised his brow at her sudden outburst. What the fuck was a minion? Daniel accidentally caught her eye, which he decided was a mistake on his part. He should have just kept moving towards the bread. “Uh, yeah,” he said, uncertain if she was asking him if the minions were cute. Were the minions the weird cartoon things on the container? “But I mean, no, not really. They’re actually kinda ugly.”
—
So what if the Minion yogurt cost a bit extra? Monica only splurged on necessities, and the Minion yogurt was definitely a necessity. Taking one from the shelf, she grinned as she twirled it in her hand and looked at the different minions wrapped around the container. She waved it at the man next to her as if showing off her latest treasure, though the smile was quickly wiped from her face when she heard his next words. “Um, rude! The minions have feelings too! I, for one, think that they are adorable, and I’m sure plenty of Facebook moms would agree with me!” She frowned. Maybe this man just needed to get a closer look?
Shoving the yogurt container into his hands, Monica pointed at each Minion with a renewed enthusiasm. “That one is Bob! He’s, like, the classic Minion. Usually has his little teddy with him. And that one is Buck, who is my personal favourite! He wears a pot of spaghetti on his head, but only when he’s a flight attendant. At least that’s what the Despicable Me Wiki says, which is obviously a highly-trusted source. Hey, that sad-looking Minion kinda looks like y–” Monica cut herself off, literally biting her tongue to refrain from continuing. Perhaps it wasn’t very nice to call random people at the grocery store ‘sad looking’, even if he did look depressed.
“Anyways, I think you should buy one! It’ll be like a shot of serotonin every morning, don’t ya think?” She looked up at the stranger while nodding, as if that would help convince him. Grabbing another container and setting it down in her cart, Monica turned towards the checkout. “Well, enjoy your Minions! I know I’ll enjoy mine, and I ho– wait, where did everyone go?” The store that had just been clamouring with activity was suddenly completely empty save for the two of them, the fluorescent lights in the aisles ominously flickering.
—
Daniel only halfway listened to what the woman said, though she caught his attention at the mention of Facebook moms until he realized she was still talking about the weird yellow things. What did she call them? Min … million … whatever. Yellow cartoon things. That’s how he would refer to them. Not that he would ever refer to them again after he turned away and went to the checkout line.
She shoved the yogurt container into his hands and then just kept going and going. On and on. Fuck, would she ever stop? She knew the names of these yellow cartoon guys? What the fuck? She pointed out a sad guy but cut herself off before stating what he easily finished in his head: the sad guy looked like him. Great. He wasn’t going to argue against something that made sense to him. But he really wanted out of this conversation.
“Yeah, okay. Already got a couple in my basket.” He lifted up the basket around his arm as if that proved the yogurt was already in there. It was, but he really did not care if she believed him. He gave a quick nod of his head at the mention of enjoying his yogurt. He glanced around to remember what else he needed from the store, when he realized at the same time as her that everyone somehow disappeared. He didn’t hear the sounds of other people pushing their carts or walking around the store. Daniel wished that she had disappeared with everyone else too, but no, he was stuck here with her. “What the fuck?” he grumbled as he tried to act surprised again. This was just how things were in this stupid town, and —
At the end of the aisle, behind the woman, a strange short yellow guy ominously stood there, staring at them. “What the shit?” Daniel said, pointing behind the woman. The weird guy lifted up its hand, and Daniel started to reach for one of his weapons when he realized it held a banana. “Ba-na-na,” it said, enunciating each syllable. “Banana.” Daniel stared at it, ready to fight whatever thing this was.
—
She could tell that this guy wasn’t being appreciative of her Minion knowledge, but that had never stopped Monica from talking before. She narrowed her eyes at his basket as he held it up, spotting the teeniest tiniest spot of bright yellow in there. She guessed that would have to do. No matter how much she wanted to convince him about the joy of Minions, there was no use wasting her time on someone who lacked whimsy.
So she put on her most polite smile and prepared to leave that sad adult man behind. Only, he was just as surprised at the slightly eerie change in their surroundings as she was. “Uhh, did the store close when we weren’t looking or what?” Monica tilted her head back to look at the ceiling, some of the lights flickering completely off now. She wasn’t scared. Why would she be scared? At least there was a grown man accompanying her, though he did seem like he would potentially leave her behind to fend for herself. “I’m scared…” she finally grumbled under her breath, hoping that her honesty would make him a little nicer.
The man pointed at something behind her, and she was almost scared to look until she heard a very familiar voice. “No freakin’ way!” Monica whipped around at a speed faster than light, just managing to catch a glimpse of the little guy before he ran off. “STUART! That’s Stuart! Of Minions fame!” She exclaimed at the man, eyes wide in disbelief. Was she hallucinating this? No, the man had clearly seen something as well — but how the hell did a Minion manifest in reality? She had no choice but to follow him.
“Come on! Before he gets away,” Monica gestured to the other man to follow her. She wasn’t sure if he actually did, nor did she care to check as she sprinted down the aisle that Stuart had just appeared in. His loss. “Banana! Ba-na-na,” she repeated, enunciating just as clearly as Stuart had, as if speaking the Minions’ language could lure them out.
—
The young woman admitted to being scared of what was happening. Daniel sighed softly. He struggled with that part of himself that couldn’t ignore someone in need of help—how no matter what he did, it would always be ingrained in him to keep people safe. Even if the person was as weird and annoying as she was. But if she was scared, then he would make sure she was safe, especially from whatever that weird yellow guy–
Oh, she knew the weird yellow guy. She knew him enough to know his name was Stuart. She said that word again, minions, and he looked down at the yogurts on the shelf. Stuart looked exactly like the cartoon character on the yogurt. He grumbled to himself as he decided that he wanted nothing to do with any of this. She would be just fine with Stuart, and he would walk out of the grocery store to leave.
As she rushed after Stuart, Daniel turned around to get out of this place (and get free groceries while he was at it). But standing in his way were two more of these minions—he would remember their species name now. One minion stood taller than the other, had only one eye, and wore the same blue overalls as the other minion that he saw earlier. The second minion was much shorter and had two eyes. Daniel noticed how this one wore a beige cap and overalls with a pink neckerchief. The two minions stared at him, and the shorter one tilted his head to the side. He pulled out two bananas from his overalls’ pockets. “Ba-na-na,” the minion enunciated.
Daniel pulled out one of his knives and pointed it at the two minions. The short minion held the two bananas up to his face and held them above his upper lip as if they were a handlebar mustache. “What the fuck?” Daniel grumbled as the minion repeated banana to him and slowly stepped closer. “Stay the fuck away from me.” He backed away from these short yellow minions. He thought maybe the young woman would be fine with her friend Stuart, but he didn’t trust these minions. He wasn’t familiar with their species and perhaps they were dangerous. He kept his eyes on the two minions though as they moved closer to him, even as he backed away.
He turned the corner and spotted the young woman. “Hey, you,” he called out as he went over to her. “We oughta get the fuck outta here.” He glanced back to see the other two minions had followed him. Daniel looked down at the short one as he came closer. He held the two bananas above his mouth still, but he looked up at Daniel with big sad eyes. “Banana?” the minion asked pathetically.
—
Monica had a lot of big dreams, but she hadn’t realized that meeting a minion in real life had been so high on her list until now. She was unsurprised to see that Stuart was a fairly fast runner, considering how indestructible most minions were (at least, according to the lore). The little guy disappeared around the corner just as she entered the aisle, and the doppelganger picked up the pace with a determination that she only reserved for the most important of occasions.
Heading into the meat section, Monica skidded to an abrupt stop when two figures blocked her path. Stuart beamed up at her with his one eye, now accompanied by a short, stubby minion who she recognized immediately. “Otto! From Minions: The Rise of Gru!” The girl was bouncing on the balls of her feet now, though she remembered to give a polite wave. She shouldn’t let her manners fall to the wayside because of her excitement. The two minions waved back at her, Stuart clearing his throat before stepping forward.
“Welcome, friend! You have entered the minionverse,” the one-eyed minion said, and Monica’s jaw dropped. Stuart was speaking to her…in English? No, minions didn’t know English like that. The yellow guy was indeed babbling in Minionese, yet somehow, the doppelganger was understanding him. “I can, like, totally understand you! How is that possible?!” She said with her mouth still agape, and Otto nodded understandingly. “Those who have faith in the existence of minions are able to understand us,” he said, rather wisely for a minion. Monica could not believe her luck, or her life! She just came here for yogurt, and she was suddenly blessed with the interaction of a lifetime.
Before she could reply, the grumpy man from earlier came stomping up behind her. Oh yeah, she had completely forgotten about him. “Mister, I can’t leave yet! I’m making friends with these minions. It’s as crucial to mankind as astronauts making contact with aliens,” she said, turning to face him with her arms crossed. There were two other minions trailing him — Buck and Brad, obviously — and Monica couldn’t help but let out an excited screech. “That’s Buck! My favourite from the yogurt! He doesn’t have a pot of spaghetti on his head because he’s not a flight attendant right now, obviously. And that’s Brad! Look how spiffy he looks in his little scouts outfit!”
The girl waved at the two new minions eagerly, and Brad moved to hold up a banana in each hand. “This grumpy human man is my twin,” he said, holding the bananas up to his upper lip like a mustache. Monica’s gaze darted between Brad, then the grumpy man, and maybe rather impolitely, she pointed at the man and cackled. “Brad, you are so right! Mister, Brad is saying that he’s your twin. That’s why he’s, like, totally copying your mustache.” She managed to control her laughter into a mild giggle, clapping as Brad did his best grumpy face. Stuart and Otto were giggling too, and Monica clapped her hands even louder. “This is so cool, guys! Isn’t this cool, mister?” She turned her attention to the man, her grin quickly fading into a look of horror when her gaze trailed down to his hand. “A knife! Why are you holding a knife?! Ah!” She instinctively threw her hands out, as if she could protect four minions from one weapon.
—
God, he needed her to not call him mister. He didn’t need that and all the minions nonsense. Daniel rolled his eyes at the idea that communicating with these minions was anything like what astronauts did. Absolute nonsense. Once again, she knew the names of these things and told him all about the two minions following him. She was … saying a lot of nonsense. He tried to follow along, but she lost him at pot of spaghetti on his head. Daniel pinched the bridge of his nose and closed his eyes as he listened to her rattle off information. He needed out of this. He just wanted to buy his groceries and leave. “How the fuck are you understanding them?” Daniel asked, exasperated. Everything these things said sounded like gibberish to him. “No, this ain’t cool. This is …” He trailed off and looked around the meat section at all the little yellow creatures surrounding them. “I don’t know what the fuck this is.”
He almost forgot that he was holding a knife—it was all so natural and normal to hold one in his hands. The young woman seemed protective over these things, which he guessed made sense with the way she knew so much about them. “Uh, I’m holding it because … because I thought they were threatening me.”
The little round one in the scout outfit looked all sad up at him. “Ka polo nopa aincoz to. To're ko mi daddy,” it said, lowering its head and staring down at the tiled floor. The only bit of that that Daniel understood was the last part, mi daddy, and he swore that that thing better not be calling him daddy or he was going to lose his mind. That same sad one held the banana up again, mimicking his mustache. “Ka sola wanna be ko to, daddy.”
“What is it saying?” he asked, glaring at that annoying little thing. It stared up at him with big sad eyes. He didn’t like it. It held out one of the bananas and pointed it at him, as if the banana was like his knife. “Stop it.” Its sad face somehow turned sadder, as it frowned deeply and looked down at its feet. It kicked its foot at the air. “Okay, you can stay here, but I’m getting out of this place.”
“No, to oeput nik nak. To miklo lotnub ta minions een tu la ma nii,” one of the other minions said. Daniel decided he was going to kill that one first.
—
Monica hated making assumptions about people, just as she hated people making assumptions about her before they got to know her. However, judging by what she’d witnessed with her own eyes in the past hour, this adult did not seem to embrace fun or whimsy. It was frustrating to her, especially because her new minion friends were literally right in front of them, but perhaps she could introduce this grumpy man to the equally-as-grumpy Mr. Cortez. Didn’t two negatives cancel out into a positive?
The girl puffed out her chest, a proud expression on her face as she put her hands on her hips. “Understanding them is my superpower. It means that I’m the chosen one!” She was certainly exaggerating that last part, yet her stomach didn’t twist in the telltale sign of a lie. The surrounding minions didn’t protest either, each of them nodding enthusiastically. “You are our chosen one, Miss Monica!” Buck said as he clapped happily, and Monica couldn’t help but join him. “Well I’m, like, so super honoured! I’ve been defending you guys since, like, whenever your first movie came out.” The folder of minion memes on her old iPod Touch was certainly proof.
But it seemed like she was going to have to literally defend the minions if this grumpy man kept waving his knife around. “They welcome us into their home and you assume they’re threatening you? How dare you!” Monica frowned at the man, shuffling over to put her body in between him and her minion friends. Brad, however, did not seem scared. He instead got closer to his newfound human twin, looking up at him with sad little eyes that made Monica want to tear up. “See! You’ve upset him! He just wants to be like you because he sees you as a father figure!” The doppelganger stomped her own foot as Brad just had, her patience with the only other present human growing thinner by the second.
Otto, ever the wise one, stepped out from behind her. “Otto says that you can only leave once you’ve accepted the minions into your heart,” Monica explained, the short, stubby minion nodding at her translation approvingly. “Once he believes, we can do the ritual, and then he can go home,” he added, which Monica subsequently translated too. “C’mon, are you seriously that much of a Debbie Downer?! You’re literally looking at these guys with your own eyes and still can’t accept them into your heart? That’s, like, seriously messed up and a metaphor for our crumbling society,” the girl shook her head at the man, sighing dramatically as she turned towards her minion friends. “I’m sorry that humans have so much hate in their hearts, guys.”
—
Daniel looked back and forth between the young woman and the yellow creatures. They spoke absolute nonsense, but she spoke back and forth with them as if it was nothing. He couldn’t wrap his mind around how she was understanding them, unless she was one of them herself. He scoffed at her suggestion that she was a chosen one, which made even less sense to him. “Fine, sure. Chosen one,” he grumbled as he rolled his eyes.
She moved between him and the creatures, and as she argued against his knife, he rolled his eyes again. (He couldn’t help it; this entire situation was a ridiculous eyerolling event). “They don’t seem to mind much,” he replied. Some of the beasts narrowed their eyes at him, but the weird one mimicking him stayed by his side. Daniel glanced down at it, and it looked up at him with big, sad eyes to rival Tree when she begged him for treats. It held its hands together and swayed sadly. “Father figure?!” Daniel scoffed, turning towards the woman. “I ain’t no father figure to this thing!” The yellow guy tapped on his shirt sleeve, and Daniel jerked his arm away from it. “Don’t make me stab you.” It frowned but stayed by his side, all while repeating and mumbling “banana.”
“I’m sorry, I gotta what?” Daniel asked, narrowing his eyes at this other beast. “Ain’t accepting a damn thing in my heart.” The whole thing sounded too much like some sort of fae bind, and he wanted nothing to do with that. He put away his knife—just for a moment—and folded his arms over his chest. Maybe these were some sort of fae creatures of which he was unaware. The little one by his side poked at him again. “Don’t touch me,” he mumbled at it. “Just because I can see them ain’t mean I gotta accept them into my heart. Don’t make no sense.”
The annoying one held up a banana above its upper lip again, and Daniel considered if screaming was an option. Usually one to keep his cool, the entire situation made him question his sanity. This had to be some sort of fae nonsense. He would have to ask Eve and Diana if they knew anything about weird little yellow fae creatures—minions, he would have to remember that name. They are minions. “Okay, so accept these…things in my heart and then do a ritual. What the fuck is the ritual?” Maybe accepting these things in his heart (whatever that meant) wasn’t a fae bind.
—
Monica wanted to tell the man that his eyes were going to fall out of his head if he kept rolling them like that, but she was not going to waste effort on his poor show of manners when she had literal celebrities in her presence. “Daddy doesn’t love me…” Brad said dejectedly, the minion pulling at the hem of his scouts outfit. Monica had no idea what receiving a father’s affections even felt like, but judging by how sad Brad currently was, not having it was a real emotional hit (especially if said father was threatening to stab his child). “Brad, don’t listen to him! Daddy will come around eventually,” she said as she stepped forward to pat the little guy on the head, making sure to send a glare in the grumpy adult’s direction.
At least he was putting down his weapon, and Monica sensed all of the minions collectively easing up ever so slightly. “I don’t see how you couldn’t accept these guys into your heart with how stinking cute they are!” She said as she gestured to Stuart who was now attempting to balance a banana on his head. “But even so, can’t you just try? Something, something, accepting people…uh, and minions, who are different from you is the kind thing to do.” She couldn’t believe that she was the one having to educate the elderly on basic empathy now. The doppelganger tsked disapprovingly, then letting out another long, dramatic sigh. “Of course, you can just refuse to be nice and live here forever. I guess that’s another option. Maybe you actually love the minions so bad that you never want to leave, which is why you’re throwing your little hissy fit right now!”
Brad held up his banana moustache once more, and Monica could sense the tiniest shift in the man’s attitude. “I sense that the wheels are turning,” Otto said as he watched the other human intently. Finally, the grumpy man showed interest in the ritual, and the girl eagerly clapped her hands together. “He wants to know what the ritual is! Quick! We gotta do it before he changes his mind!” She said to the minions with urgency in her voice, Otto mumbling something to Buck who then scurried away to retrieve something. Now, did Monica have any clue what the ritual was going to be? Absolutely not. The fact that minions were genetically drawn to doing evil things didn’t escape her, but she had faith that they’d changed for the better after so many movies. Hell, she would believe in them enough to cover for both her and the grumpy man.
“This is going to be so fun. I just know it,” she said to him with a grin just as Buck emerged from one of the aisles. He held a very familiar object in his hands — the fruit hat that Donny wore in Despicable Me 2. Buck handed it over to Otto, who then handed it to Monica, and the doppelganger admired the surprisingly sturdy hat. “A crown fit for a king…” she said dreamily, all of them turning to look at the grumpy man. She didn’t think it was quite fair that he got to be their king, but it was just more proof of how kind and generous the minions were, accepting someone who didn’t even want to accept them. Monica paused for a moment, contemplating what to do before kneeling down and holding the fruit hat out for Brad to take. “I think you should do the honours, since he’s your daddy and all that. Hey! Grumpy man! Get down here to crowning level already!”
—
Daddy? Daniel blinked as soon as he heard the young woman say something about daddy, and he really did not want to know what she was talking about. He needed to focus on getting out of this situation. Accepting…the minions into his heart. That was the way out. Fine. He wanted to get out of here, buy his groceries, and get back home. She rambled something about accepting people and that minions might be different from him, but they deserved it too… He slammed his eyes shut, shook his head, and sighed loudly. He sort of saw the point she was making—he had been trying to come to terms with his odd relationships with shifters…
Daniel decided he could ignore this insanity and focus instead on just accepting the weird little creatures. For now. If they kept bothering him after the ritual, then he would have to kill them. One of the creatures scurried away to another aisle. Daniel held his breath, worried about what it might have in its hands upon its return. “Yeah, fun,” he mumbled in reply.
Daniel nearly choked on his own spit as soon as the creature returned with a fruit hat thing. Grapes, apples, oranges, peaches, and a pineapple all attached to each other in a crown. Six bananas poked out at the top of the crown. “Oh, fuck this shit.” The creatures turned towards him and narrowed their eyes in response.
“To miklo lotnub ta minions enta tu la ma nii,” one of the creatures said.
“Fuck you,” Daniel spat back.
Meanwhile the obnoxious woman seemed thrilled by the crown and even suggested the annoying creature place the crown on…his daddy’s head. Daniel was daddy. Daniel was the minion daddy. He groaned as he leaned down enough for the annoying beast to put the fruit crown on his head. If this was the way out, then this was the way out. He tried to not curse again once he was on the same eye level as the creature. Tears welled in its big brown eyes as an excited smile grew across its face. It held the fruit crown in its hands and gently lowered it onto Daniel’s head.
“Okay, I accept minions into my heart. Yadda, yadda, yadda,” he grumbled, as he straightened back up.
“Thank you, daddy,” the creature said, as tears of joy streamed down its face. “I’m your son, Brad.”
“You ain’t my son.”
“I love you, daddy!” Brad wrapped its twig-like arms around Daniel’s leg as it hugged him. Daniel grimaced and awkwardly patted its head, not sure what to do about the creature hugging him.
“I’ll see you again soon, daddy,” Brad said. It pulled away from him and, with the back of its hands, wiped off the tears streaming down its face.
“No, we ain’t never seeing–” Daniel didn’t finish his sentence as suddenly the lighting in the grocery store returned to its bright fluorescents. Squeaky shopping cart wheels echoed throughout the store, and people chatted with each other in each aisle. Daniel spun around as he realized it was all back to normal. Something heavy was on his head. He patted the air above him, and his hand brushed against the soft fuzz of a peach. “Oh fuck me,” he grumbled as he tore the fruit crown off his head. A woman with her shopping buggy gave him an odd look, before deciding that whatever he was doing was not her problem in this odd town.
The groceries could wait for another day or two. He needed out of this place. But at least he had some free fruit.
—
“Hey! Watch your language!” Monica hissed, wanting to cover Brad’s ears for him so he didn’t have to hear such hateful speech. If only she knew where minion ears were located at all. Grumpy Man finally relented though, seemingly biting his tongue as he knelt down for the crowning. She clapped along with Otto, Stuart, and Buck as the fruit crown touched his head, the doppelganger bouncing in anticipation. Although there wasn’t a lot of heart in Grumpy Man’s words, at least he wasn’t outright threatening her new friends anymore. “I’m so happy for you, Brad!” Monica cheered as she wiped the welling tears from her eyes. Seeing Brad and his daddy form a bond in real time warmed her heart — maybe one day, she would get to form a fatherly connection with someone.
She was so wrapped up in her feelings that she almost let the fact that Grumpy Man could understand Brad slip past her. “You’re beginning to understand Minionese! Your heart is growing!” Monica said excitedly, the other minions humming along with approval. “With the ritual complete, we must go for now,” Otto said, the doppelganger whipping around when she heard his words. “No! Don’t leave yet!” She scooted closer to the three other minions as they started to become translucent, as if they were fading from existence. “Do not fret. We will meet again soon.” Otto nodded reassuringly, and Buck and Stuart enthusiastically waved at her until they all vanished into thin air.
Monica was once again blinded by fluorescent lightning, the lively grocery store manifesting around her as if nothing had ever happened. She turned to Brad’s daddy to see if he had returned to the human realm with her; she was overjoyed that he’d not only returned, but with the fruit crown too. “Looks good on you!” She couldn’t help but giggle as she watched Brad’s daddy’s eyes bug out of his head, tearing his crown off and storming out of the store. “Hm, must’ve had a tough day, huh?” She said to the confused woman with an innocent shrug before walking off, back towards the dairy aisle.
Her shopping cart was conveniently where she had left it, and Monica glanced at the one yogurt container that was already in there before turning back to the yogurt shelf. She looked closely at the containers again, making eye contact with the tiny printed versions of Bob and Buck as she reached her hand out. “I’ll come back for you guys, don’t you worry,” she said quietly, fingers grazing their pictures. She forced herself to turn away before she became tempted to buy every single one, but not without one last wave at the multiple minion eyes looking back at her from the containers. “Goodbye, my friends. Until next time.”
