May 15
oh my captain
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oh my captain
just did the most staggeringly self-indulgent thing ever LMAO but it was so so fun :’3 💗
Cute horror movie date in the manga I'm reading abruptly reminded me of the guy who asked me to go see paranormal activity 2 with him in uni and he worked himself up so much that even though it was still the bright happy part of the film before anything remotely scary happens he was literally shaking with fear and clutching at my hand. I asked him if he wanted to leave and he shot up so fast he ended up dragging me half out my seat. The amount of pitying looks I got as we left was mortifying, I felt like everyone thought it was me freaking out even though I was mostly just fucked off that he'd let me pay for the tickets just to behave that way. We could've seen so many other films!
connected
i received a tarot reading earlier, which loki hijacked fully to force the poor reader to channel a message of aggressive, dismissively phrased support in my desires.
oh you liked how in my fic for him. bucky didn't fall from the train well what if he did?
His phone buzzes. Steve picks it up and sees a text from Hill, then another one comes in. They’re both phone numbers. The first one is Becca’s and the second is Benny’s. Benny’s name is still Barnes, but Hill’s text has Becca’s last name as Proctor. Steve exhales, then he calls Becca.
It rings for a long time. Steve bites his lip.
“Hello?”
Becca’s voice is rough and cracking with age, but it’s her. Steve exhales heavily.
“It’s Steve,” he says quietly. “Hi.”
There’s silence for a moment.
“What flowers were at your wedding?” Becca asks.
Steve smiles, bittersweet, but it’s just like Becca to be suspicious. “Red carnations and daisies. Bucky had a daisy in his lapel,” he adds. “Your ma did all youse’s hair with daisies, too. And you and Betty had matching dresses, little cap sleeves and empire waists and a bow in the back, and your ma bought both of you a pair of kitten heels, even though you were only eight, they were yellow with bows, too. Benny had a dress with a big poofy skirt and she kept grousing about it, even though she tried to get me to wear a wedding gown with a poofy skirt. I let Benny pick the color of your dresses, though. She picked pale yellow because she was obsessed with lemons back then. The wedding cake was lemon because of her, lemon and lavender.”
“Steve…” Becca exhales. “Is it really you?”
“Yeah,” Steve whispers, trying to hold back sudden tears. “Becca, Bucky – Before he – Before –”
“What?” Becca asks gently. “What did Bucky do?”
“‘M pregnant,” Steve confesses.
“Oh, my G-d,” Becca whispers. “Oh, my G-d. You’re pregnant?”
“Three months,” Steve then tells her, his voice almost breaking. “I’m about three months in.”
“Did Bucky know?”
Steve lets out a watery sort of laugh. “Yeah,” he says. “Yeah. He – He said I could go on one last mission, the mission to get Zola, then he was gonna tell Colonel Phillips and get me discharged. We didn’t know for sure, but…”
“Oh, Steve,” Becca murmurs. “Where are you, honey?”
“Brooklyn,” Steve whispers. “Bedford-Stuyvesant,” he adds.
“Okay, honey, I’m gonna come pick you up, alright? I got a spare bedroom, you can have it. Bucky wouldn’t want you to be alone. What’s your address?”
Steve bites his lip hard, fighting back tears. But she’s right.
“Alright,” he mumbles, then recites the address for Barton’s apartment building. “I don’t have a lot of things right now,” he says. “I – I, uh, I’m trying to get the Smithsonian to give back all our stuff…”
“I heard your collar got taken out of the exhibit,” Becca says. “You have it?”
“Yeah,” Steve answers. “I had to get a new key fitted for the lock. Buck–”
He can’t say it. Bucky had had the key on the chain that held Steve’s dog tags. It had fallen with him, to be forever entombed in stone and ice.
“It’s okay, honey,” Becca tells him. “I won’t be long, just an hour. Have you got a nest set up yet?”
“No,” Steve admits softly. “I – I want –” His voice cracks and he swallows. “I want my nesting stuff. It’s all in the Smithsonian. They’re saying it all belonged to some Omega I collared.”
“I’ll sic my grandkids on ‘em,” Becca says. “What have you eaten today?”
Steve groans and drops his head back against the wall. “Protein bars,” he mutters.
“Anything else?”
“No.”
“Bucky’s gonna come back from the grave and take a double-folded belt to your ass if you don’t start taking better care of his property,” Becca offers kindly.
Steve laughs a little again, then wipes tears from his eyes. “You’re right.”
“What have you got other than protein bars?” Becca asks.
“Protein shakes,” Steve sighs.
“Oh, boy, Bucky’s rolling in his grave.”
Steve almost laughs. He squeezes his eyes shut and takes a shaking breath.
“If you need to cry, you should,” Becca says. “It’s good for you.”
“Call me when you get here,” Steve murmurs. “I have to pack.”
“Alright. Just an hour, big brother.”
clous is so fucking cool i need to chat about him more often......
DOES TROYE SIVAN JUST WRITE FOR KLANCE?????
