a short and incomplete list of things that modern day reincarnated patroclus would do that would make modern day reincarnated achilles absolutely furious:
dress up as achilles every single halloween; he thinks it’s clever and hilarious but achilles still isn’t over the whole him dying thing
go out of his way to meet and then introduce achilles to small annoying dogs in their neighbourhood that are named achilles, particularly chihuahuas
keep a copy of troy even though they both hate it and watch it once every couple of years purely for the sake of saying that brad pitt did a good job playing him
stubbornly continue to think that instant rice is an appropriate meal for an adult
fall asleep sitting up on the couch every single night instead of coming to bed
wear all his shirts tucked in no matter what; he says it’s just force of habit but achilles is pretty sure it’s just a way to deflect groping
pretend not to know achilles if he’s being a dick in public
