#-monitor

[companionwolf]

This is not as inspired as other things I have made but I am trying to grasp at, to communicate, something I feel is not really able to be communicated at all.

[companionwolf]

when the nightmares come

and they always come

you do not

cannot

wake

up

[companionwolf]

Instead of sleeping, I have been doing this: a personal scale of emancipation/elaboration for parts in our system. Based on reading from the Haunted Self and such. Under cut for the length.

Elaboration

Tier 1 Low - CPTSD level, contains trauma reactions/strong emotions/etc, no sense of identity, low range of memory/emotions/etc

Tier 2 Low-mid - may have age, title, non trauma function, opinions, some sense of identity, some range of memory/emotions/etc

Tier 3 Mid - may have a name, a few preferences, a couple relationships, and an internal appearance, some sense of identity, has limited range of memory/emotions

Tier 4 Mid-high - has a name, more preferences, has relationships and an internal appearance, strong sense of identity, has a narrower range of memory/emotions

Tier 5 High - has a name, age, preferences, relationships and beliefs, internal appearance and such, strong sense of identity, wider range of memory/emotions/etc

Emancipation

Tier 1 Low - CPTSD level, no sense of self or identity, can't act autonomously, feels like you in a mood, not distinct, does not act individually, can't front, minimal influence

Tier 2 Low-mid - independent identity, no amnesia, somewhat distinct, doesn't act individually, can't front, some influence

Tier 3 Mid - some sense of identity and amnesia, may feel possessed, can talk to other parts, distinct, sometimes can act individually, can front, some degree of influence and intrusion

Tier 4 Mid-high - sense of identity, amnesia or sense of watching not controlling, distinct, often individual, can front, some degree of influence

Tier 5 High - has a sense of identity, amnesia/watching, distinct, can act individually, can front, high degree of influence and intrusion

Examples (1st # is elaboration, 2nd is emancipation)--

Wolf is a highly elaborated and emancipated part. (5/5)

Church has a moderate to high level of elaboration and a moderate to high level of emancipation. (5/5 or 5/4)

The Monitor has a mid-high level of elaboration and a mid-high level of emancipation (4/4)

D-Wolf has a mid level of elaboration and a mid-high level of emancipation (3/4)

Merger has a mid level of emancipation and a mid level of elaboration (3/3).

Etc etc etc.

Parts at 3/3 and below get classified as fragments personally. 3/5 to 4/3 is less elaborated alter. 4/4 - 5/5 is a more elaborated alter, with higher numbers meaning more emancipation/elaboration. When a part registers as being both at a mid level of emancipation and elaboration, I don't think we personally consider that a fragment anymore.

You can be poorly elaborated but highly emancipated (1/5, for example); we'd still classify this as a fragment personally.

Scales--

From 1/1 - 1/5 to 3/3: fragment

From 3/3 - 3/5 to 4/3: less elaborated alter

From 4/4 - 5/5: more elaborated alter

As demonstrated below:

PERSONALLY CLASSIFIED AS FRAGMENTS

1/1 - 1/5

2/1 - 2/5

3/1 - 3/3

PERSONALLY CLASSIFIED AS LOW ELABORATION ALTERS

3/3 - 3/5

4/1 - 4/3

PERSONALLY CLASSIFIED AS HIGH ELABORATION ALTERS

4/4 - 4/5

5/1 - 5/5

[companionwolf]

but my mind

is mine for now--

i never asked

to be here at all

so why do i have

to face the fear

of losing it?

[companionwolf]

I've decided I like liminal spaces as well, since someone in co-con said 'I bet you'd like the poolrooms and non-Entity In There brand of the backrooms etc'.

[companionwolf]

'Hey, the Monitor like the concept of Lucid Blocks. That makes sense. Kind of funny, actually.' Haha yes the former dream monitor likes dream related --

Someone just screamed really loud and thought 'OH MY GOD HE'S LITERALLY A DREAM AGENT FROM TRIANGLE AGENCY' about me, which I suppose I could be classified as a Dream, but I don't do the associated work anymore.

'WHY DID THE AGENCY CLOCK US SO WELL WITH THIER ARC ASSIGNMENT YEARS AGO' Because it was the real canon Agency, we've established that.

Anyway yes haha dream related media appeals to me, I wonder why. (Sarcasm.)

[companionwolf]

Someone in co con or via passive influence is thinking about making halo machinima. Is it too late for us. Do we need to be put down. Is a one person production even viable.