I’ve always had the title ‘smartest in the class’, and while it’s always bothered me it gets used all the time. There’s always pressure on me to do the best because if I don’t then I feel like a complete failure. It’s getting to the point where these thoughts stop me from remembering exam material, but if I ask people for help they just say I’ll be fine because I’m ‘smart’. I don’t particularly want to tell a teacher or my parents, but it’s too much stress, and I worry about it all the time -Xym
Hey Xym!
I had the same issue during my study years and I absolutely hated it. No one really understood that the only reason I got my good grades was because I felt the pressure so badly that I had to have them, I wouldn’t stop studying, and I got the same response when I asked for help. I know it’s a really difficult situation to be in, and it’s not something that seems easy to reach out for help for. Especially when you really fear for your grades because of these anxious worries and no one seems to take you seriously, it can put extra stress on not wanting to tell teachers or parents.
When it comes to study, try and detach yourself from all of these labels that people are putting on you and just focus on what’s at hand. Believe it or not there is a thing where you can over study. It’s important to try and make yourself a study schedule. Think of the times during the day when you are most focused and use those as your optimum study points. Instead of studying the entire day, use your study schedule. It could look a little something like this: (an example of mine)
8am – Breakfast (it’s important that you don’t skip on your meals and make sure to eat your meals three times a day with snacks to ensure you have enough energy, and to help make sure when you do study that you are as focused as possible)
8.30am – Yoga (I use this because it relaxes my anxiety, when I feel calmer I am able to study better)
9.00am– Study
11.00 – Rest (studies have shown that those who take breaks in between studying are more productive than those who don’t, even if they study for less total hours. This is because when you do study you are 100% there and available, as opposed to studying for say eight hours and feeling anxious the entirety of the time)
12pm – Lunch
12.30pm – Study
2.30pm – Rest
3.30pm – Walk (exercise helps to burn off that energy that may be stored up at this point with anxiety, it also releases endorphins so that when you come back to your study you are feeling good and motivated)
4.30pm – Study
6.30pm – Dinner
7pm – Yoga
7.30pm – Study
8.30pm – Shower and get ready for bed
Everyone’s study schedule will be different but they’re important and have been proven to show results when it comes to getting better grades and remembering test information. Another thing you could use, is making sure you use the same sensory stimulus while studying and then while taking the test. For example, every time you study, but only while you study, you write in black pen and you chew peppermint gum. Then when you take your test you write it in a black pen and chew peppermint gum, the sensory stimulation also helps with memories. Make sure that you are aware of what you will be allowed to write your test with if you do use this example, as sometimes you can only write in pencil, or only a certain coloured pen.
I know you don’t want to talk to people about it, but it may be a good idea to just let your teachers know how you are feeling towards your study and your grades. Let them know that it’s a stressful time for you so that if there are extra supports available you will be able to take advantage of them. If you don’t want your peers to know you are going to extra tutorials or anything of the like just let your teachers know and I’m sure if they understand your situation they will be more than happy to respect your wishes.
Just because you receive good grades doesn’t mean you don’t deserve the supports and extra study, everyone needs it lovely!
Much love, Willow x