#052116

[storlyghtbabyz]

I don't know how to deal with loss.

[diehae17]

One of the coolest! #SpongeCola #052116 #lateupload @yaelyraz

[kpoppluskdramafangirl-blog]

#TKC16

k, so i havent posted in awhile and i just wanted to say that i went to tkc16 yesterday!!!! so basically ill just wanted to let u ppl know abt how io felt abt it. basically first off, one of the most exciting things thats happened in my life so far lol bc i got to see gfriend!! yuju is the cutest thing ever irl btw, but anyways besides the actual concert and fanmeet that i found was pretty exciting just bc of gfriend there wasnt much else there to be overly excited about except for the plushies they were selling there and stuff like albums from sarah & tom. the canada dream stage was pretty cool too and i guess it wasnt bad but theres honestly not much to get excited about the actual convention.\

but on to the concert part, it was rlly cool cuz gfriend was like right there and when the lights turned off in the theatre and i saw their shadows i literally burst in tears and was like omg is my bias gg right in front of me???? like i actually couldnt even cuz umji was being the cutest thing on stage!!!!

also the cons tho cuz basically there was a few things id like to mention abt my experience...after the concert and fanmeet we were supposed to get presigned posters and apparently they hadnt had signed posters so they actually got them to sign them after the concert and all us buddies waited outside near registration for like a half hour and i was getting bored and it kinda sucked so poor planning on their part for that but tbh whatever cuz gfriend could honestly have taken all the time in the world and bc im a pretty deep into the gfriend fandom buddy i didnt care as much as i shouldve...

also there was actually a no camera policy in the theatre which okay fine... i get a little cuz u only want the vid for urself to advertise tkc for next year like geez but i tried taking fancams only to have to turn off my camera every few minutes bc i was scared someone would catch me taking a vid of gfriend so yea they kinda sucked but anyways it was generally okay i guess and btw ill upload a vid sometime on yt (kpoppluskdrama fangirl) if i get the chance to and btw ill upload the bigbang fancam that i uploaded before and deleted for a reason that i forgot lol but yea so look forward to it sometime

[joy2thestars]

thoughts.

I wish I were stronger. I’m so confused.

I love him. I absolutely love him. He broke my heart but I think I can forgive him. What he did was wrong and he needs to learn his lesson but its so hard to stay mad at him. I can’t resist him either. I feel used and I’m not sure if he’s totally taking advantage of me or if he simply just can’t resist me either. I know I can’t take him back but all I want to do is be with him. I can’t imagine not being with him. I hate that I’m still so attracted to him. Every time I look at him, it feels like I’m looking at him for the first time. When I’m out with friends, trying to shake the feeling, I can’t help but miss him. I just want to come home and see him. When did I become this pathetic.

I wish you’d realize that you love me too. You’re this confused puppy dog that doesn’t know what love feels like. Just because we’ve been fighting and it seems like we fell out of the honeymoon stage, it doesn’t mean you stopped loving me. You don’t just stop loving someone just like that. Someone new comes into your life and you get that infatuation feeling again and you’re stupid enough to throw away everything we’ve built together for this infatuation. Of course she’s nice to you, you barely know her! I gave you a second chance but you chose her. You can’t even imagine how much that hurts.

However, I can’t be with someone like you. You broke my heart, my trust. You asked me to lie for you if things ever happened with her. That’s fucked up. When you asked me that, all I could think was “who are you?” She did the right thing in rejecting you. I still can’t get over the fact that you dumped me for someone less attractive, and is still figuring herself out. You went into this knowing that she might not even like you that much. Haven’t we already established that you’re not a good gambler?

Yes, it does make me feel better that you got rejected. Hurts, doesn’t it? So, your crush rejected you. It really doesn’t hurt as bad as being rejected by someone you gave your heart to. At the same time, I feel hurt because I just feel like a second choice now. The sad thing is, you don’t even want to still be with me. I really hope it’s just the guilt because I really don’t believe I was that bad of a girlfriend. I keep asking myself, “what the fuck did I do to make you stop loving me?” I just don’t understand.

We had a year and a half with absolutely no problems. You made me confident and happy and our love seemed so impenetrable. At one point, the word “boyfriend” wasn’t a strong enough word to describe how important you are to me. I was talking to friends and the word “husband” slipped out instead. You almost called me your wife in front of your friends too. We were mutually in love with one another. What the fuck happened. Things don’t go downhill so fast in just a month. I really got blindsided.

I’m sorry I said shit that were low and mean. I just wanted you to talk to me. I knew something was bothering you. I never meant to hurt you. You need to understand that I was going through a lot at the time. You think it’s bullshit but all I needed was your support and you couldn’t even give me that. I know I need to learn how to control my emotions and I can work on that. It’s obviously not me if I’ve only been this way one month out of the entire year and a half we’ve been together. Your own father is on my side on this breakup. Everyone can tell you still love me and that you’re just being stupid right now. WAKE UP.

Thank you for being adamant on splitting. Your guilt prevents you from hurting me some more. As much as I know that we shouldn’t be together, I really wish we could just forget everything happened and just stay together. I don’t want you to move out. I don’t want to come home and not see you. I don’t want to sleep on a bed by myself night after night. I thought I was ready to let go but I really am not. Please don’t go...

[cubbcore]

well that’s EXACTLY what I needed, some shitty post about being old. Birthday’s coming up, moms dead, and now that. fan-fucking-tastic. fp is going out with or without me, he doesn’t seem to care how I feel about it. Yesterday I didn’t drag him home because it’s not his fault I suddenly got sad. it’s not his job to come rushing over every time I get upset. I don’t want to be that kind of wife. But now he knows. He knew ahead of time and he’s still basically saying “fuck you” and going out without me. I don’t know why I’m surprised, he’s make it clear he cares about smoking more than he cares about me. shown up by fucking cigarettes. ha. ha. ha.

[twodayiis]

Today is a desperate plea