1.26 I can’t remember the last few days again but they were good. today I went to my internship which seems like it’s going to be a joke. my preceptor doesn’t really seem to take it seriously. I’m in bed with my love while he plays fallout and I still enjoy it. I like watching and it also keeps him next to me. he did the dishes and rubbed my back and gave me lots of kisses and told someone the mark on his neck was from his fiancé heh even though I told him to say that. he says he’s really happy and I feel bad because I didn’t make him this happy all the time and the only reason it’s going so well is because I just pretend we aren’t even in a relationship. he says he’s sorry for taking the pictures. I don’t know. he deleted them but who knows if he really did. he says he feels dumb for doing it. he says i just rolled over and it just happened and I’m like ok well what else are you gonna do if things are ever in your favor… this whole thought is ruining my night. nothing he is saying about it is helping me feel better. he’s back to playing the game but it’s ok, I don’t want him to feel bad about it even though I still do. eh. getting tired. I just don’t get why he thought it was okay when he knew it wasnt. is this the type of person he is? 1.25 was nice, we just laid around and he kept telling me how he feels more in love with me and how he’s lucky to have me. I let him take photos of/with me, hopefully I won’t be finding anymore photos taken from when I’m asleep. he promised he wouldn’t do that anymore so I’m sad I found them again, even after how upset I was so it makes me feel like my sadness meant nothing to him. he said he took them because he was happy. who knows. anyways I also got drunky that night and we both felt really weird on the car ride to his house but it was good weird.
I can’t even remember 1.24…