InterventionTimes
„Ilvin? Really? You are staging the intervention?”
The man looked a little distraught, but straightened his jacket and cleared his troat: “Well!”
Richard leaned back and spun one round in his chair.
Ilvin cleared his throat louder: “WELL, yes. I am really here to stage an intervention, you can’t-”
He stopped himself by holding onto his desk: “Is it because you’re so down to earth and into computers? Computers are very much not down to earth”
“Err”
“They are full of porn and cat videos. And you make a good cat. But the hair goes everywhere, it’s very distracting,” he tapped his pen on the table, taking a deep breath, “But that’s not what you’re here for. You want to talk to me about my private life. About my relationship with Trinity… she doesn’t like cat hair distractions either, you know?” He frowned. Maybe she would make an exception if it purred on her belly. Once a month. He opened a browser to look.
“Boss? Your love interest is the Metatron, king of angels. Currently unaware of that circumstance. It… might be worth a thought, that”
He returned to twirling his pen, raising both his brows at his employee: “Oh? You think? You think it would be ill advised to intrude on the private life of high ranking people? High ranking in the kinda celestial part of our lives? That it?”
Ilvin, lower ranking demon, office worker in his employ and mere messenger to this little social disgrace, looked supremely uncomfortable.
Richard narrowed his eyes at him: “… it’s cause you’re easy to persuade to do it, huh? Not because you’re grounded. Did they just order you? You know what. You’re doing good work. I’ve seen your personnel calculations. And recommendations for seminars for each of them. They were spot on. IT requests became fewer. People relaxed. Less stress. You know them all pretty well, your colleagues, don’t you? Even if under pressure? Want a promotion?”
When the young man looked even more uncomfortable, Richard sighed. No promotion, then. He threw him an amulet with his insignia. Should help the guy in the long run.
Of course, his eyes went wide and Richard could see how he warred with himself. It was a surprise, when the boon was put it back on the table.
“We… with all due respect. We really are worried about you, boss. Of all the people. This one is dangerous. Really dangerous. Maybe… think about it? For a spell?”
“Heh. Spell. Magic. She can’t even do that right now…”
The kicked, unhappy puppy look did not really suit his guest.
“Okay, puppy. What do you even want to hear from me, mh? ‘Oh, you’re right, she’s dangerous! I’ll break up with her right now!’? Is that it? It sounds a bit stupid, doesn’t it? You’re not stupid. Evan is. Damn that boy, seriously. And not in the good way. Who steals from another greed person, it’s ridiculous!”
The puppy cleared his throat. He wasn’t a puppy. Still Ilvin. Ilvin looked unhappily worried this time and said: “We… are worried. You… get distracted easily. You might accidentally wake them up? IF they wake up, it’s… not going to be pleasant? They’ll know you tricked them? Played with them? Smiting you is not off the table, then…”
“So what,” he shrugged.
The scandalised look spoke of actual loyalty. It was somewhat endearing.
“Oh, please. I made sure to have a proper structure. I sometimes fuck off for weeks! Iceland is beautiful. The reception horrific next to the volcano, it’s fun. You should go there, the hot springs are wonderful, even slightly sulfuric, perfect for your skin. It’s great to sit in the warmth in the middle of snow. Polar opposites so close together are always exciting”
Another clearing of throats, another look. Oh.
“What I wanted to say: It would be an inconvenience. I know I’m the face of the company. But really. There are others almost as brilliant as I am, and they know who’s my direct stand-in, no dire arguments there. I’d lose my body for a while. It’d be fine”
“You’d lose your status, too!”
Richard laughed: “Ah, it’d be worth it”
“That… you can’t actually be serious about that, sir”
He threw the pen in the air to catch it again and point at him: “Ey, no ‘sir’ing in my presence. We’re all humans here. Mostly. When no one comes in to question my relationship choices”
“Well, boss then please tell me how this doomed relationship could be possibly worth it”
One deep breath later, he frowned at Ilvin: “You’re getting mighty personal here. BUT. You’re lucky. Because it makes me happy. To talk about her, that is. Or them. Maybe. Her right now, definitely. The relationship, too. But that’s probably not what you want to hear. So!”
A few seconds passed, Ilvin looked at the hands his boss had slapped on the table: “… yes?”
He relaxed back into his chair, hands hanging down the armchair: “Trinity… calms me. Her entire being does. I don’t lose focus when I’m around her” He closed his eyes, imagining her smile. “I can be around her and it’s… I don’t have to be on my toes”
Richard sighed: “I’m sure you are aware I’ll make sure won’t remember anything of this, yes?”
“Pretty sure, yeah”
“Good. Well, she doesn’t want my money. Sure, she takes it, but she’s almost angry about it. She mostly knows what I’m doing by now… and just doesn’t care. I make millions with all you people’s expertise, I’m the boss of a lot of employees. But we’re cuddling on the couch and eat chicken nuggets and it’s great. We squabble. About fish. Fish! She made me chicken soup when I was sick. There are potted plants on her roof. Potted plants, Ilvin! It’s no garden or anything. But there are fruits and we have salads and it’s good. I’m listening to Jane Austen when she reads it to me. We live entirely different lives. I can’t help her with hers and she can’t help me with mine and it’s nice to just be able to be there. Listen to the stupidness the other had to endure. Or tell them how wonderful a small thing was. Or try a homegrown tomato. Or invite her to a vacation or shopping spree. Just be there and be able to touch and kiss and cuddle and it’s not calculated in any way at all. And if we fear it is, or there is any other problem, it’s addressed and it’s fine. It’s just fine. I trust her. And I believe she trusts me as well”
He opened his eyes again to see a perplexed employee.
“… and the sex is pretty damn great, too,” because that was really an amazing part of this. Really.
Ilvin nodded in a wobbly, matter of fact way, not quite making eye contact.
“And… yeah… while I was… not quite serious in the beginning… and saw seducing her as more of a challenge, it… changed. So. Now you know. And you’ll forget all this and remember that I have a brilliant strategy of influencing the king of angels. Good?”
“Eh… good, yes”
“… do I have to make sure you remember that… or can you do that all on your own?”
“I think I can manage, s- Boss”
Richard threw him his amulet again: “Good. Now shoo. No more interventions, there is plotting to do!”
And he left.
And he plotted. Either some land or how to surprise Trinity, he wasn’t sure yet.
