hc thinking about pm!skk where Dazai willingly lets himself get captured by the enemy; the enemy, not knowing that it's a deliberate setup, makes a call to Chuuya demanding a ransom for Dazai's release and Chuuya's just like. well no. you can keep him actually
Dazai: my partner will be furious that you've taken me hostage. he would do ANYTHING for me enemy: is that so? Dazai: yes. call him enemy, calling Chuuya: i've got your partner. you'll need to pay a hefty amount for his release Chuuya: Chuuya (already on his way): nah keep him enemy: what
Chuuya: just curious tho. how much is the ransom you're demanding enemy: 5 million. cash only Chuuya: LMFAOOO not even $2. you can keep him fr enemy: what th— Dazai, in the background: WHAT THE HELL Dazai: gimme the phone let me talk to him YOU STINGY SLUG. WDYM NOT EVEN $2???
the enemy standing there confused af holding the phone on speaker and Dazai gets irritated and just removes his handcuffs himself like ugh just give me the phone,,,the enemy doesn't even have enough time to process what exactly is going on before BOOM. Chuuya Has Arrived
bonus is them barely paying the enemy any mind and just bickering while handling the mission (quite efficiently, if i may add) and the enemy's just like. hellaur??? what is going on
Dazai: you absolute cheapo i'd at least pay $2.05 for your release Chuuya: the way you live i'd be surprised if you even have $2 in your bank account Dazai: that's your fault? you're so tiny i had to spend my money buying a microscope to be able to even see your minuscule little form Chuuya: i Shall kill you Next enemy: ??
Dazai, feigning hurt and sulking (dramatic): i would've paid your ransom Chuuya: let's be honest you don't even pay for your own ramen when we go out to eat Dazai: why would i need to when your wallet is right there Chuuya: you're not paying my ransom if it's my OWN MONEY Dazai: it's the thought that counts
