Jan 3, 2017
I feel so ugly today
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I feel so ugly today
He made you feel special didn't he?
تشعر بضعفك في كل مره تحاول خداع نفسك بأن أقوى ، تشعر بإنهيارك في كل مره تعتقد أنك لملمت نفسك صموداً ، تشعر بثقلك على نفسك في كل مره تحاول عبور هذه الحياة بخفة ، مرهق ما نكلف به أنفسنا ، مرهقة أحلامنا، أمالنا تطلعاتنا ، مؤلم هذا العالم الذي في كل مره تحاول أن تشعر أن خُطاك في الطريق الصحيح يخبرك أنك تائه ، مخيف شعور التيه لمن أراد أن يكون في طريقه فقط ، قاتل لمن أراد أن يسكن إلى خطاه .
sali
today was okay i guess, at least its raining right now :-)
I think I'm gonna be on Twitter more now. Just to post shit and venting.
Today’s adventures are brought to you by Peace
Well everyone, Perth is AWESOME. From the moment we got to our house the place felt like home. Everyone is incredibly friendly and the style of our living quarters and base feels cozy and familiar to me. I LOVE that everyone here has the same passions as I do. It gets me so excited to hear others going on and on about trafficking and pornography (in a passionately-against-it sort of way). I actually managed to stay awake until 9:30 last night, and then completely passed out until my alarm went off at 7 this morning. (I meant to get up at 6 to get myself into routine, but I set my phone wrong. Oops.) One of the girls made me coffee this morning, and so I had a cup while I read my Bible before breakfast. The feeling in and around me is truly peaceful, and I’ve been praising God for that all day. I know that it won’t last forever —this adventure will get difficult and I’m bound to start missing home— but for today I rest happily in this peace. The day has brought me a new assurance that I am exactly where God wants me, and there really isn’t a better feeling than that.
literally a giant fur ball, it’s adorable
So I dreamt last night for only about a few hours but I dreamt 2 dreams. One was what I was thinking about before I feel asleep. The other was the Taurus. A video of him laughing and smiling and giggling and hugging me and things like that and I was watching a video of him doing that stuff and I was sad but happy. Sad because I really did miss him (guess I still do) happy because I was able to see his face smiling again like he used to laughing like he did and jus oh gosh. It was amazing. I miss being in a relationship I guess but he was the best relationship I've had so far so maybe that's why I'm longing for it back. I have a really bad head ache.