I guess this could be summarized as: Who was Min Yoongi?
This is Hobi’s POV. For Yoongi’s click here. It can be read in any order, but it may be better to read this first.
Warning! Angst ahead.
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His day was just like any other. His job was normal, his friends were normal, everything was normal. He was happy.
Boring.
It was at night when he’d toss and turn in bed. Nightmares of running somewhere, nowhere. But there was always a light, faint and sometimes visible. At first he thought it was a street lamp, guiding his way. Though, Hoseok could never reach the end, the light always moved. Then, he realized it was the moon. Big and bright. Always out of reach. It was only there for him to admire from afar.
Then there was a boy who stood under the moon’s light.
Hoseok’s nightmares consisted of running towards the boy. Though, like the moon, he could never reach him. The boy stood with his back turned to Hoseok, so he never saw his face. One night he got close enough to see the boy properly, only to wake up in a cold sweat. He clutched his shirt, something dragged him down, he couldn’t get out of bed. It was as if his heart was replaced with lead that he carried throughout the day.
And his days were normal, his friends were normal.
It had been a month since the nightmares appeared. Frankly, he was fed up with being lead somewhere only to wake feeling unsatisfied everyday. And everyday the boy would taunt him during his waking hours. He wanted–no–he needed to know who this boy was.
“Tonight,” he decided, “tonight I will find out who he is.”
“What are you talking about, Hoseok?” Seokjin, his co-worker, asked him.
“N-nothing.”
Hoseok never looked forward to his nightmares, but with a new determination to find this boy, and possibility to have a good nights sleep, he was ready to face his fear. The only problem was, he couldn’t fall sleep. He tried counting sheep, singing to himself, and thinking about nothing. After hours of tossing he finally wore himself out. The last conscious thought he had was how pretty the moon was.
This night was just like any other. Hoseok stood in the middle of a road, oblivion surrounded him. There was no beginning, no ending. If it weren’t for the moon, he’d be lost. There was the boy, back turned, staring up at the moon, miles away. His body acted before his mind, Hoseok felt the concrete pound against his feet as he ran towards the boy. He sprinted faster than ever and it seemed like it actually had an effect. The boy stayed where he was, his figure crept closer and closer as did the moon. The weight in Hoseok’s heart lessened as he neared the boy, this freedom compelled Hoseok to run even faster. His breaths were getting shorter, legs already feeling the pain of running for so long. After what seemed like hours he surpassed the other night, where Hoseok could see the boy clearly. He saw that he wore a black ensemble from head to toe, not an inch of skin showing. The boy blended in with the night. Though, his hair was silver. At some point, Hoseok ran so fast he felt like he was flying, his feet would leave the ground for seconds only to pound at the ground beneath him. His legs were burning as were his lungs, but he didn’t care. He was going to see that boy.
At last, at last, after an eternity he was close enough to touch the boy. Though, he was doubled over, heaving, sweat dripping from his forehead. Somehow, he stood firm on both feet and faced the boy in front of him.
“You.”
When the boy turned around, all air was sucked out of Hoseok’s lungs. He was ethereal, skin as pale as the moon, face softer than clouds. Hoseok tired to find what color the boy’s eyes were, though all he could see the night sky dotted with stars. Calling him pretty was almost an insult.
“It’s actually Yoongi.” The boy said. Tone darker than dusk, colder than snow.
Though, Hoseok found comfort in winter.
“Yoongi.” He liked the way his name felt on his lips. “I’m–”
“Hoseok. I know.”
He clicked his tongue. “If only you knew how long I’ve been looking for you,” Hoseok bit back.
He saw the slightest twitch of Yoongi’s lips. “If only you knew how long I’ve been waiting for you.”
This dynamic was natural, as if he had known Yoongi all his life. This life, the previous one, the next one. He knew Yoongi.
“You’re telling me that every night I ran to you and you just waited for me?”
He didn’t expect Yoongi to smile. The corner of his eyes crinkled.
“If I could, I would’ve ran to you, too.”
“Why can’t you?”
Yoongi looked up, where the moon was supposed to be. Hoseok didn’t realize that it was absent, the only light source seemed to be the boy in front of him. Skin glowing a pale white.
“I just can’t,” was Yoongi’s answer.
“You can’t move?”
“No.”
“So, why did it seem you kept getting further?”
“Because you were too.”
A beat passed.
“Well, I’m here now. If you can’t move, I’ll stay right here.” Hoseok dared to step closer.
When Yoongi laughed, it was like the night woke up. Stars blinked into existence around them, illuminating what was once pitch black.
When Yoongi laughed, it made Hoseok want to never wake up.
“You can’t stay here forever, though,” Yoongi said.
“Why not?”
“Because, you’re supposed to be out there.” Yoongi nodded behind him, somewhere in the distance.
“Well, then, I’ll stay here for however long I can be. It took forever to find you and I’m not letting go.” Hoseok smiled.
There. Right there was there color on Yoongi’s face. He tried to hide it by turning away, but it stood out against the monotony. A faint pink, but it quickly faded from his cheeks.
The boys eyes wandered on each other’s face, silently. It was as if seeing each other for the first time, but they both knew it wasn’t.
Hoseok studied Yoongi, as to remember every single detail about him. There wasn’t much to remember, just his entire face. The true color of his eyes was an impossibly dark brown, his face was mark free, and his nose was as cute as a button. The only color on his face was his lips, chapped and red. Hoseok unintentionally licked his own lips.
Yoongi was perfect, at least he seemed to be. The only issue Hoseok had was that Yoongi would fade in and out of the world. He would become blurry if looked at for too long. So, Hoseok focused on other things on his body, but his eyes would always stray towards those lips. He just had to make sure Yoongi was real. Despite him being in a dream, despite everything he knew, Hoseok felt Yoongi’s presence.
The pair were silent as he slowly raised his hand to touch Yoongi’s face. When he closed his eyes, Hoseok saw just how long his eyelashes were, which was another thing to remember. Yoongi didn’t move even when Hoseok finally cupped his cheeks. But all he felt was absence, as if he was caressing the wind.
“I’m sorry,” Yoongi said.
“But I can feel you,” Hoseok brushed his thumb against his cheek, but it only felt like his finger went through fog. “You’re faint, you’re like a mist, but I feel you.”
“It’s only because you want to,” he whispered.
“Then, I want to feel you more.”
Yoongi smiled, face downcast. “You can’t will me into existence.”
When Hoseok brought his other hand up to his face, Yoongi stiffened. His eyebrows scrunched in concentration, it was his turn to remember everything about Hoseok.
“I’m real,” Hoseok said, “describe me.”
“You’re…” Yoongi sighed and let a tear fall. He couldn’t meet his eyes, but didn’t need to in order to describe Hoseok. “You’re warm. You’re full of life. You’re the exact opposite of me.”
“Yoongi.”
“You have brown eyes, a smile brighter than the sun. You have a stupid mole on your top lip. When you smile, your mouth turns into a heart.” Yoongi brought his hands up to meet Hoseok’s. More tears fell.
“You’re kind,” he continued, “you would stay with me, a stranger.”
“But I know you.”
Yoongi nodded his head.
“Please,” Hoseok begged, “look at me.”
He saw watery eyes, tears brighter than diamonds that fell. He saw red lips, quivering. He saw the boy he loved, Min Yoongi.
When more tears fell from Yoongi’s face, Hoseok heart ached. It was tugged by invisible red strings that only the man in front of him controlled. And those strings pulled Hoseok closer to Yoongi’s face. He was afraid of embracing Yoongi, as if he was porcelain, ready to break at the slightest touch. His hands stayed on Yoongi, whose hands tried to grasp Hoseok’s. He studied Yoongi’s face once more, but his face was already too blurry. So, Hoseok closed his eyes and closed the gap between them.
Jung Hoseok woke with tears streaming down his face. He didn’t know why, nor could he remember his dream. Or was it a nightmare? He remembered that he had nightmares, but not what they consisted of. That was the worst part, he forgot everything. It sucked.
His lips felt cold, as if something had just left them. There was also his heart, which seemed strangely fine. That was the one thing he remembered, he would always wake up with pain. This morning, it felt fine. This morning, he felt fine.
His day was just like any other. His job was normal, his friends were normal, everything was normal. He was fine.
Empty?
It was at night when he felt something. He’d stare at the moon for hours, a faint feeling of warmth spread through him even at the coldest of nights. He didn’t know why, but he was drawn to the night. Hoseok was often compared to the sun but he yearned for the moon.
