#aasuperstar

[maxmundan]

My acting career has gone into free fall The commercials and bit parts have all run dry My agent isn't taking my calls anymore And residual checks when they finally arrive aren't enough to squeeze out a latte What's a has-been never was got to do to pull his sweet ass out of turnaround? Now, I've heard of a place where a man can relax schmooze with the bigwigs make some blockbuster Hollywood deals No, there ain't no acting class with this kind of juice This ain't no casting director workshop I'm going to willingly hand in my Screen Actors Guild Card for a brand new career as an A.A. Superstar After a brief stint in rehab with Lindsay Lohan I'm guest speaker at a Beverly Hills meeting Look, Sir Anthony Hopkins Over there, it's Tim Allen After the meeting at the Rock 'n Roll Denny's Christian Slater asks to buy me a coffee I hear even Downy, Jr. knows who I am Looks like I finally made it as a big fish in a champagne filled bathtub Look at me now, Ma I'm an A.A. Superstar I hear it's never to late to sleep my way to the middle So I starfuck my way down the D list I've done one of the original MTV veejays and a chick from "Designing Women" There was that time in the bathroom with that woman from "Star Trek" and a night bumpin' uglies with Charo Now, that may not sound like a whole bunch o' fun but them's the perks of the job as an A.A. Superstar Now I'm working the circuit and selling my tapes for $3.99 a pop Everyone on the west coast can recite from memory every salacious detail of my story It does break my heart that I'll never play Hamlet but I'll never need to set my sights high as an A.A. Superstar

Max Mundan. A.A. Superstar

© Max Mundan 2015

Get your very copy of my new book, I’ll Only Write Poems for You, by clicking right HERE!

[maxmundan]

My acting career has gone into free fall The commercials and bit parts have all run dry My agent isn’t taking my calls anymore And residual checks when they finally arrive aren’t enough to squeeze out a latte What’s a has-been never was got to do to pull his sweet ass out of turnaround? Now, I’ve heard of a place where a man can relax schmooze with the bigwigs make some blockbuster Hollywood deals No, there ain’t no acting class with this kind of juice This ain’t no casting director workshop I’m going to willingly hand in my Screen Actors Guild Card for a brand new career as an A.A. Superstar After a brief stint in rehab with Lindsay Lohan I’m guest speaker at a Beverly Hills meeting Look, Sir Anthony Hopkins Over there, it’s Tim Allen After the meeting at the Rock ‘n Roll Denny’s Christian Slater asks to buy me a coffee I hear even Downy, Jr. knows who I am Looks like I finally made it as a big fish in a champagne filled bathtub Look at me now, Ma I’m an A.A. Superstar I hear it’s never to late to sleep my way to the middle So I starfuck my way down the D list I’ve done one of the original MTV veejays and a chick from “Designing Women” There was that time in the bathroom with that woman from “Star Trek” and a night bumpin’ uglies with Charo Now, that may not sound like a whole bunch o’ fun but them’s the perks of the job as an A.A. Superstar Now I’m working the the circuit and selling my tapes for $3.99 a pop Everyone on the west coast can recite from memory every salacious detail of my story It does break my heart that I’ll never play Hamlet but I’ll never need to set my sights high as an A.A. Superstar

Max Mundan, A.A. Superstar

© David Rutter 2014

Follow me on twitter @dmr226

[maxmundan]

AA Superstar

My acting career Has gone into free fall The commercials and bit parts Have all run dry My agent Isn’t taking My calls anymore And residual checks When they finally arrive Aren’t enough To squeeze out a latte What’s a has-been never was Got to do To pull his sweet ass Out of turnaround?

Now, I’ve heard of a place Where a man can relax Schmooze with the bigwigs Make some blockbuster Hollywood deals No, there ain’t no acting class With this kind of juice This ain’t no casting director workshop I’m going to Willingly hand in My Screen Actors Guild Card For a brand new career As an A.A. Superstar

After a brief stint in rehab With Lindsay Lohan I’m guest speaker At a Beverly Hills meeting Look, Sir Anthony Hopkins Over there, it’s Tim Allen After the meeting At the Rock ‘n Roll Denny’s Christian Slater asks To buy me a coffee I hear even Downy, Jr. Knows who I am Looks like I finally made it As a big fish In a champagne filled bathtub Look at me now, Ma I’m an A.A. Superstar

I hear it’s never to late To sleep my way To the middle So I starfuck my way Down the D list I’ve done one of the original MTV veejays And a chick From “Designing Women” There was that time In the bathroom With that woman from “Star Trek” And a night bumpin’ uglies With Charo Now, that may not sound Like a whole bunch o’ fun But them’s the perks of the job As an A.A. Superstar

Now I’m working the the circuit And selling my tapes For $3.99 a pop Everyone on the west coast Can recite from memory Every salacious detail Of my story It does break my heart That I’ll never play Hamlet But I’ll never need To set my sights high As an A.A. Superstar

© David Rutter 2014

Visit me at http://www.maxmundan.com/

Originally published in issue #5 of the Dressing Room Poetry Journal

dressingroompoetryjournal.com

[maxmundan]

One of the more outrageous Rehab Stories. Originally published by Dressing Room Poetry Journal.