In relation to the spectrum ask: Wouldn't aspectrum still not include celibate people? And that opens up another question, of a spectrum does exist, to what point do you need to not want to have sex/lack sexual attraction where you'd be in need of resources? I think "asexuality belongs with feminism" is a great take because making the world easier to live in single really does just, help everyone and little to no specific groups. Cause, even non-ace ppl will have a period when they live alone
An a-spectrum would indeed exclude people who choose not to engage in sex or romance. This is why I prefer the “umbrella” language because it’s less about where you fall on a “spectrum” of attraction (which is just so muddy and difficult to define) and more about do you need to be under the umbrella or not? Are these discussions relevant to you? If so, welcome.
For your second question, as far as an ace/aro umbrella goes, I don’t think there is or should be a clear boundary between who is in and who is out. If you find yourself in need of the resources then partake in them. And even if you don’t? Why don’t you still go to a meeting or discussion and listen in, maybe you’ll learn something about your own relationship to sex/romance.
Because you’re right, everyone will probably be single at some point. Everyone needs to know about consent. Everyone needs to be aware of the different kinds of relationships outside of romance. I think cishets especially would benefit from this information and culture an ace/aro community can bring to the table, since cishets are often pressured to stick to tradition, and often just don’t explore different ways of doing relationships (unless they live in particularly liberal families and areas — which I do not, so my friends and family who are cishet are very stuck to traditional gender roles and relationship styles which is why I bring this up).