It’s my birthday, January 1st. It’s probably my least favourite day of the year. I think about how I, 100%, wasn’t supposed to be here, and how somehow I worked my way into so many people’s lives anyways. I didn’t deserve anything that I was given. A place to stay, people to call family, my brothers. And even though it’s what I was given anyways, even without asking, I wasted it all. I wasted all of their time, effort, promises, care, in a time they could’ve been giving it to someone else. Someone who needed it. Someone who would’ve done BETTER with it, wouldn’t have made a fucking mess of things, but you know what? I went and got killed, I ruined it all. I always do. I always always do, and I’m already starting to do it here. I’m going to wake up and I’m going to remember typing this and feel stupid, I know I’m having one of my moments, just in a mood, but I’m not supposed to be here. I’m not supposed to have this second chance and the people I love aren’t supposed to still care about me. I’m sorry to everyone I knew. I’m sorry to everyone who still knows me. But I’m thankful, anyways, for everything. I’ll have post-meltdown clarity and be alright.
Ace. One Piece introject.
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