#ada's brainworms

[tteukbyeol]

hi everyone

ive got some not so exciting news to share

after doing a full health checkup, i was determined to have a small brain tumor (has been causing chronic migraines) as well as other chronic conditions that require immediate treatment

i love writing for this blog but i’m afraid i will have to go on rest for a couple of months to focus on my health

if any mutuals would like to keep in touch with me outside of tumblr, please feel free to shoot me a message <33

[tteukbyeol]

vent timeeee

spending a couple of weeks in my hometown in kazakhstan (which is why i’ve been inactive) and i am genuinely astonished by the ginormous cultural gap between me and people my age

you’d think things would have progressed a little bit by now, but no, even people who seem progressive at first glance are full of unchecked bigotry

obviously i cant place western expectations on people of the post-soviet diaspora, but i am genuinely so saddened by how close-minded people are, refusing to acknowledge the humanity in those they do not understand

but it’s genuinely hard for me to hang out and make friends here, considering it’s very unlikely i can meet someone who matches my values

there are things i love about kazakhstan but the more i come back, the more i realize i can never stay here

[tteukbyeol]

can’t believe i just saw someone say hucklerobby is ‘problematic’ bc of the power imbalance when the power imbalance is the whole POINT of the ship like…cmon now this shit isn’t real.

also there’s definitely something to say about some people’s tendency to infantilize whitaker. i might raise my eyebrows a bit at such a big age gap in rl, but at the end of the day, dennis is a grown ass man in his late twenties. you can be thrown by the age gap without having to treat him like a toddler please and thank you.

(tags for my own navigation)

[tteukbyeol]

(rant-ish)

i enjoy watching tv commentary/critique a lot but whenever the video covers a show with a large, active fandom ik it’s gonna pmo

there hasn’t been a single time that videos of this kind didn’t include humiliating/condescending/disparaging jokes about the fandom in their scripts

it is so exhausting. even if i agree with the creator’s critique i can’t afford to hear them out without feeling humiliated.

there is nothing embarrassing about fandom activities such as shipping, theorizing, fic writing. in fact, a lot of people participating in fandom have a solid understanding of narrative structure and provide useful commentary/analysis themselves. many people construct their own worthwhile narratives that sometimes surpass the source material.

i’ve talked about this on here before, but it really rubs me the wrong way when creators that have nothing to do with fandom go out of their way to put us down in their scripts, considering a large percentage of people who are active in fandom are queer/neurodivergent. there is no fucking reason to do that.

[tteukbyeol]

ik nobody’s here to listen to me ramble about the pitt but i just find it hilarious how the most catharsis i felt writing a character (ever in my life probably) is a 54 yo man on the verge of a complete mental breakdown with whom i have nothing in common

[tteukbyeol]

my byler and hollanov wips: covered in dust and haven’t been able to cross the 5k mark

absolutely random hucklerobby wip: over 15k

[tteukbyeol]

crushing on leon s kennedy but only because ‘i’ve got you’ is something i desperately wish to hear in life but never do

[tteukbyeol]

rewatched bojack horseman while sick in bed and was blown away again by how fucking good that show is

it's almost uncanny how accurately they portrayed my familial dynamic with the horsemans i feel so hollowed out every time