NSFW, Vent about being aspec
Being aegosexual, iamvanosexual, and sex-ambivalent feels so. Challenging. Not to mention my romantic orientation, lithromantic, and platonic orientation, caedplatonic. It just feels so challenging to figure out what I want, when what I want changes. Sometimes I feel like I want a sexual relationship. I want sexual acts done to me. I want to feel the pleasure. The thing is, I want someone else to pleasure me.
It can be really challenging to know what to do with these feelings and unmet libido stuff, especially when I don’t experience sexual attraction. So anyone becoming sexually intimate with me is going to have to start with me trusting them, which is hard when I also have trust issues. I don’t know, sometimes I feel so incredibly unstable with what I want, however it’s also hard to figure out what I want at the same time.