THESIS
you are not a hero. monsters do not deserve that title.
ONE: A BRIEF HISTORY
you used to be something bright, something hopeful.
but that was before you had everything you held close
and thought was safe ripped away from you and
torn to shreds and the pieces thrown back in your face.
because when does the universe not mock little boys who hope?
so you’re not a very whole boy. you’re not a very holy boy.
you don’t pray or beg or hope for things. you just
let the world spin on its axis and whatever happens,
happens. you don’t let yourself care.
you learned to just strike a match, and let the world burn.
TWO: TO DEFINE A HERO
let’s take a look at gold. gold is pure. it doesn’t tarnish,
doesn’t rust away to bone. it gets sculpted
into something beautiful and strong, and then it holds true.
heroes are born from gold,
and then they hold true.
THREE: TO DEFINE A MONSTER
how about we put it like this:
if you’re a hero, then you’re made of gold.
if you’re a monster, then you’re not made of gold.
if you’re not made of gold, then you’re not a hero.
therefore, monsters cannot be heroes.
now let’s say that’s valid, let’s say that holds sound.
so if monsters cannot be heroes, cannot be made of gold,
what are they, then?
monsters are something more molten, something more susceptible to rust.
they’re impure, the edges of a shadow.
not the middle, of course, not the darkest part,
that’s more something like demons,
something that never had the chance to be good and right.
but monsters,
monsters are close enough to the light to touch, and they refuse it.
monsters make the choice to be monsters.
you make the choice to be you.
FOUR: A SERIES OF INCIDENTS
now to clarify how you fit that mold, how it is that you are,
definitively, a monster.
you did not have to kill her, but you did.
you did not have to push them to the edge of their lives, but you did.
you did not have to leave him hanging, but you did.
you did not have to let him think you could actually help him, but you did.
these are choices you’ve made. these are things you have done.
on purpose.
these are lives you have ruined.
on purpose.
FIVE: SOME FINAL THOUGHTS
because, see, here’s the thing, you didn’t have to do this.
you really, really didn’t.
but instead you have blood on your hands and a hole in your chest,
and you let it all happen, made it all happen.
so what if you may have saved some of their lives?
you broke more of them into pieces.
you broke yourself into pieces.
TO CONCLUDE
you are a monster. you failed to be a hero.
