#aidynawk

[cryingpan]

For Splatoon 4, Nintendo should consider a boy band for the new idol group. They could have such group names as:

- Splatstreet Boys

- New Squids On The Block

- Ns'INK

[cryingpan]

Aidyn to Aidyn 8

(from November 6, 2024, outdated as I'm writing 9, but I saw this in my drafts)

Wow! It's been 8 years since the last time I did one of these apparently? There has been SO much that's changed since then, so strap in and strap on cuz this is gonna be quite the ride.

The last time I wrote one of these, I was in college an ocean away. Fast forward 8 years I'm nearly 5 years into my professional career and have lived a good amount of my young adulthood learning so much about myself.

These days I'm still absolutely queer, not entirely sure what words and flags suit me best as I kinda pick and choose throughout the year. Since the last AtA, however, I've actually swung back around and might consider myself a demigirl. My pronouns currently are they/she, but never he. I guess in recent times I've connected more with my afab-ness and don't resent a lot of it anymore. Maybe I had some internalized misogynistic views that I've gotten over for myself. I am plenty more comfortable in my own body, which may have more to do with accepting certain conditions I have thanks to my parts.

[cryingpan]

I've finally gotten around to playing the demo for Our Life: Now & Forever. Tamarack's excitement for everything and Qiu's natural charisma are so adorable! Also, as a Beginnings & Always girlie, I am very excited to see kid Baxter!

[cryingpan]

I love Dear Evan Hansen dude 😭

[cryingpan]

I'm in such lesbians with my girlfriend

That's it that's the tweet

[cryingpan]

Well, I once again need to log onto desktop Tumblr to fix the age in my profile.

Birthday time.

[cryingpan]

I've found that I'm a jack of all hobbies, master of none. While I've learned so much about my many interests over the years, I feel like I don't know enough or have enough experience to feel like a part of any of the communities for said interests.

I've taken an interest to playing cards and wrist watches, but I couldn't tell you anything about the history of certain manufacturers. I love music but my theory only goes as far as whatever I learned in school. I enjoy playing instruments but can only go so far as playing chords most of the time. I like video games but I'm not good at them even when I'm putting all my effort into trying. Hell, even in my career I feel so inadequate because I don't feel like I'm putting in enough effort to learn more about the field.

In these times, especially online, it feels like I can't consider myself a fan of anything without understanding everything about it. Logically, I know this is not true, but I can't help but still feel lacking in any interests. It makes it hard to connect and relate with others because I feel like everyone seems to know so much more than me to the point where I can't begin to express how I feel about these interests and hobbies. Idk

[cryingpan]

Suddenly personal "damn" moment (tw: deceased family)

My nibling's blog has been deactivated. A shame, honestly. Would've been nice to have some sort of archive of what they deemed worthy of their blog. Fortunately our messages are still here, but it still sucks.

Been thinking about them a lot lately, honestly. It's been four years since their passing. We bonded over Dan and Phil quite a bit, and I've been following their content more actively again. If they were alive I'd do what I could to see Terrible Influence with them.

Fuck cancer.

I would've loved to see how they explored their identity as they grew up. For once I got to be the gay elder, even if I barely knew what I was talking about.

I just went and made sure I had screenshots of all our social media conversations in case they stop existing for any reason. On Instagram in particular they had to leave voice memos because they were no longer able to see and write. I don't feel ready to hear their voice again, but at some point I will so I can screen capture and record their voice. It feels weird but I want to make sure I have those last moments of our final conversation.